


As the World Falls Down

by BigBandBombshell



Series: The WinterMiracle Chronicles [2]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, BuckyXan, F/M, Fluff, Non-MCU compliant, Playlists Available, Recovering!Bucky, Roughly in line with Civil War, Telpathy, WinterMiracle, fan novel, mostly sfw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2019-10-28 11:33:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 57,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17786591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigBandBombshell/pseuds/BigBandBombshell
Summary: Six months ago Bucky’s brain unmade itself. Six months ago Alexandria “Xandria” Wesson learned that she could be just as dangerous as the man she loves. They’ve been able to hide behind the Avengers while Bucky healed but SHIELD still hasn’t risen and time is up. With Ross circling and their future in doubt, Xandria and Bucky have to go back out into the world. They’ve promised to protect one another, but the price will be higher than anyone could have guessed.





	1. The World is Waiting

Cold air spilled over Xandria's skin. Something was wrong. The air in their room was kept cold enough to suppress her mutation but Bucky's warmth usually drove away any sting the chill might cause. If Xandria was cold enough for it to wake her, Bucky wasn't in bed. She cracked her eyes open and glanced around the room. Bucky was nowhere to be seen, but a faint sliver of light glowed underneath the bedroom door. Her first instinct was to reach for him telepathically but if he had snuck out of bed in the middle of the night he probably wasn't in a good place. At least not one good enough to have another person show up in his mind. Not even her. His doll, his Doc.

 

Xandria kept her senses reeled in close as she slipped out of bed. Her footsteps were faint whispers against the hardwood as she crept to the door and stopped with her ear against the seam between door and frame. If Bucky was in a bad place he would probably be pacing. If he was in a really bad place, she wouldn't hear anything at all and that would be her cue to worry. But as Xandria listened, she realized she could hear voices. Two of them, to be specific. Only team members were allowed in their apartment which meant that whoever else was in the living room would feel Xandria's scan as soon as she touched their minds. And at this point, she was curious enough to eavesdrop.

 

“Are you sure this is a good idea, Stevie?” Bucky's whisper was husky. He hadn't been awake long.

 

“Not really, no. But that's where the team needs to go and I know you've been eager to get back out in the field.”

 

“I wouldn't call it **eager** ,” Bucky hedged. “I gotta admit, it's pretty nice just spending time learning how to live again. Reading books, watching movies.”

 

“Listening to music. Spinning Xandria around the common room like it's a swing hall.” Steve's smile was clear in his voice. Bucky chuckled and Xandria smiled, soft and sweet.

 

“Exactly. A little bit of the good life.”

 

The two men sat in silence for a moment before Steve cleared his throat.

 

“Look, Buck, I wouldn't ask you to go if I didn't think it was important. SHIELD is still under wraps which means they can't protect you as well as we had hoped.” Another silence fell between the two men. A sudden wave of Bucky's bitterness rolled over Xandria and she pressed the back of her hand to her mouth to stifle a sharp, surprised gasp. She drew it away from him and hid it away, a frown chasing away the last of her smile.

 

“Six months, Stevie. I've had six months to rest up since that mess in Siberia.” Bucky's bitterness spilled into his voice. “I still break sometimes, ya know? Even with Xandria there it...it gets pretty bad. I lose time and there's still those nightmares. Fuck, those nightmares...” Bucky's bitterness twisted into pain. Xandria couldn't leave him out there alone anymore. Not even with Steve.

 

She cracked the door open and peeked out. Steve and Bucky were both rigid with surprise, their eyes trained on the bedroom door. Bucky sat on the couch, his back mostly to the bedroom, while Steve leaned forward in the matching armchair, his elbows on his knees and a glass of ice water clasped between his hands.

 

“Did we wake you up, darlin'?” Bucky was off the couch in one fluid twist. Xandria barely made it out of the bedroom before Bucky was in front of her, one arm around her shoulders and his other hand on her hip. She didn't bother hiding the shiver that pebbled her skin as the warmth rolling off him chased away the chill that had followed her from the bedroom.

 

“The cold woke me up.” Xandria shrugged as she brushed his mind with affection and concern. The last thing Bucky needed right now was guilt over leaving her alone in their bed.

 

“Have you...I mean did you...” Steve sat up a little straighter in his seat.

 

“I was eavesdropping.” Xandria blushed faintly but refused to look away. “There are only a few reasons Bucky gets out of bed in the middle of the night and none of them make telepathy a good way to reach him.”

 

Bucky pulled her close, his lips against her hair. Xandria closed her and smiled, her fingers curled softly against his chest. Steve let them have their moment but Xandria opened her eyes before it went on too long.

 

“You want to take him back into the field.” She didn't bother pretending to ask. Steve nodded all the same. “You know better than anyone that he's not ready. His brain scrambled itself on top of that tower **six months ago**.”

 

“It isn't a question of whether or not he's ready, Xan.” Steve set aside his glass and rubbed absently at the stubble that had grown in since that morning. “Ever since SHIELD fell, part of what we do is public relations. And nobody knows Bucky as anything but the Winter Soldier.”

 

Xandria didn't normally think about the effects of Natasha's decision to dump all of SHIELD's files on the internet, but right that second she could have throttled her for it. Bucky's thumb rubbed absently against her waist and she quickly pulled her agitation back.

 

“He's got a point, doll.” Bucky slid his arm from around Xandria and caught her hand in his. She mulled over Steve's words as Bucky led her to the couch and pulled her down beside him, her body tucked into the crook of his arm. Uncertainty radiated from his mind and she took his free hand in hers.

 

“So we take him back into the field and show the world that he's on the right side now?” Xandria looked over at Steve and he nodded.

 

“That's the general idea. We've got a new mission and it's pretty straight forward. A terror cell is going to blow up a police station in Lagos. We just have to keep that from happening.”

 

Xandria glanced from Bucky to Steve and back. Both men had closed their minds to her.

 

“And the part you're not telling me?” She glanced back up at Bucky. He kissed her temple but wouldn't quite meet her eye. Steve shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He wouldn't quite meet her eyes either.

 

“Tony's been talking with Ross. They don't think you're, uh, stable enough for field work.”

 

Heat laced up Xandria spine as if to reaffirm the point.

 

“If Bucky's stable enough for field work, then so am I.”

 

“That's not what Tony thinks.” Steve grimaced at the glass in his hands.

 

“I don't particularly care with Tony thinks.” Xandria's tone was clipped and Steve looked up in surprise. “I like Tony, I really do. He's the goofy uncle I never had. But Bucky is my priority. And if Tony thinks that he's going to send Bucky out into the field without me right there beside him, he's wrong.”

 

“Darlin', I don't think -” Bucky cut off as Xandria brushed her mind against his. He opened to her just enough to let his fear slip out. Fear for her, fear **of** himself. “I don't want you in the field. Not yet.”

 

“You're not going alone.” Xandria tightened her jaw as she held Bucky's gaze. His jaw tensed and the hand on her shoulder took a tighter grip than was strictly comfortable. Fear lapped at her mind as he opened himself more fully to her and Xandria soothed him as best she could without slipping fully into his mind. Their emotions ranged back and forth from one mind to another until Bucky sighed.

 

“Is Wanda going?” Bucky dragged his eyes from Xandria to look up at Steve.

 

“Both Maximoffs are on the mission roster.” Steve gave a short nod. Bucky looked back at Xandria.

 

“Wanda can stabilize me.” Xandria spoke loud enough for both men to hear but she didn't look away from Bucky. “And that's assuming she'll even need to.”

 

Fresh fear brushed Xandria's mind as Bucky frowned.

 

“And who's going to stabilize me if you get hurt?” Bucky's fingers tightened on hers.

 

“I will. Because with you right next to me, nothing will hurt me enough for it to take me out.” Xandria poured every ounce of her confidence into the connection between their minds. It left her a little exhausted but it eased the tension in Bucky's shoulders. Steve cleared his throat and they looked toward him almost in tandem.

 

“I'll add your name to the roster.” Steve's shoulders slumped and a frown drew small lines at the corners of his eyes.

 

“I know you don't like anything about this.” Xandria gave him a small smile as a peace offering. Steve didn't smile back. “But where Bucky goes, I go. It's the only way to keep him safe.”

 

“I know, Xan. I know.” Steve didn't sound any happier. The three of them let the silence build until the ice clinked against Steve's glass. He set it aside and pushed up from the seat.

 

“We leave in twenty-four hours,” he said. “I suggest you two both get some practice in before then. Buck, firing range. Miracle, work with Maximoff.” He gave them each a nod, then showed himself out.

 

Bucky waited to speak until the door clicked shut behind Steve.

 

“Are you sure you're ready for this?” Bucky pulled Xandria into his lap and pressed his lips to her hair once more.

 

“No.” She had never lied to Bucky and she wasn't going to start now. “But I am absolutely not letting you walk into battle without me there to patch you up.”

 

The set of his jaw made it clear that Bucky wanted to argue. Xandria curled into him and closed her eyes, her head on his shoulder.

 

“Can we argue in the morning?” She murmured. “Today was rough and we're both still tired.” Bucky's arms tensed and a wave of irritation swept from his mind to hers. But tenderness followed close after and he nodded.

 

“Alright, doll. We'll argue in the morning.” Bucky stood, Xandria's weight easily cradled in his arms. She couldn't help but smile. Judging by Bucky's faint smirk, it was the reaction he had counted on. He carried her back to their room, the lights in the living room automatically dimming behind them.

 

Xandria expected Bucky to set her down and slide in beside her. She didn't expect him to crawl up onto the bed, her body still held against his.

 

“In twenty-four hours at least one of us is going to be in Lagos.” Bucky murmured as he laid her down, his body warm above hers. “By the time we're done arguing and training tomorrow, it'll be wheels-up.”

 

His lips were soft and warm when they found hers. Xandria's hands curled into the front of his shirt and pulled him down until his weight warmed her from head to toe.

 

“We're not sleeping tonight, are we?” Xandria whispered the words against Bucky's mouth and he smiled.

 

“Not for a while, doll.” His hands found her waist and slowly slid her nightgown up. The silk of it tickled her thighs and Xandria sighed happily. Bucky growled low in answer. “Not for a good, long while.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's companion playlist can be found at:  
> https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/the-world-is-waiting
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	2. In the Small Hours

“It's not going to happen.”

 

“Bucky, you're being -”

 

“You're not going.”

 

“I don't take orders from you!”

 

Bucky and Xandria glowered at one another over the kitchen island. Bucky's hands were planted flat on the marble countertop while Xandria perched on her stool, arms crossed over her chest. Neither of them had touched their breakfast.

 

“It's not an order, Doc. It's me trying to keep my girl safe.” Bucky clenched his jaw but the tension didn't reach his eyes. They were still soft. Worried. His mind moved against hers and Xandria sent a reflexive tendril of comfort across the bridge that connected them. Bucky drew in everything she gave him and Xandria couldn't help but soften. Her arms relaxed slowly until her hands rested in her lap.

 

“We're both part of the team, James,” she said softly. Bucky's shoulders relaxed a fraction of an inch as his name crossed her lips. “If we're going to be in this line of work and we're going to be together, we have to keep each other safe. It has to go both ways.”

 

Xandria slid off her stool and moved around the island. Bucky kept his hands pressed flat to the counter as his shoulders tensed once again. He never wanted her too close when they argued. He just didn't trust himself. Xandria harbored no such fears, even as Bucky's hands tightened on the marble.

 

“Bucky, please.” She stopped a few steps away, one hand on the counter. Bucky glanced over at her, then sighed and looked away again.

 

“I'm fine in the field. I'm not as breakable as you are, doll.” His face twitched as something flashed across his mind. He hid it away before Xandria could track it and she frowned faintly, brows drawing together.

 

“Not physically, no.” Xandria took another step closer. “But we've barely started cleaning up what was done to you. One wrong trigger in the field and -”

 

“And I'm a weapon again.” Bitterness pooled in Bucky's voice and spilled into Xandria. She pushed it aside and held back the anger that flared in her own mind, then flooded their connection with compassion. Her anger was not meant for Bucky. It was for his tormentors but he wouldn't see it that way, not without more of an explanation than was wise this morning. Steve gave them a few extra hours than was normal on mission days before he had FRIDAY wake them up. It hadn't been quite enough to make up for the late night Bucky and Xandria had shared. And while neither Bucky nor Xandria would have rather slept instead, they were both a little more tired than was ideal. It made them both short-tempered.

 

“That's not what I was going to say.” Xandria was careful to keep her voice soft. Bucky glanced up at her, a frown drawing his expression down. “I was going to say that one wrong trigger and you're vulnerable. Our last mission – our only mission with the team – was in Siberia. You lost yourself, James. I watched you fall apart. And if I hadn't been there, if we hadn't been together...” Xandria cut off and tightened her control of the bridge between them.

 

Fear washed over her, dark and deep. Most of it wasn't hers but there was no way she was going to give it back to Bucky. He saw it on her face, she couldn't help that. But none of it seeped back into his mind and that was all Xandria cared about. She swallowed it down and hid it away where it could never touch him.

 

“C'mere, babydoll.” Bucky pushed off from the counter and pulled Xandria hard into his chest. She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face against his shirt, eyes closed and breathing forcibly even. Bucky stroked her back, his lips against her hair. Xandria's fear ebbed under his touch and she pushed it down further until she could trust her voice not to shake.

 

“I can't let you go alone.” Her voice was carefully neutral as if that would fool him. The way she hid against his chest gave her away, telepathy be damned. “We can stay out of the way, but I can't let you go alone.” Bucky tensed and Xandria closed her eyes, praying. His hand stilled against her back and for a moment neither of them breathed.

 

“Alright.” Bucky's voice was flat, but he held her tighter. “Alright, I won't fight you on this.”

 

Bucky's hands slid to Xandria's shoulders as he took a step back. His frown was still firmly in place as his eyes searched hers.

 

“But we stay out of sight unless Steve calls us in. And **you** stay out of firefights. Full stop.” He arched one brow and waited for her to answer.

 

“I go where you go, Bucky. So if you want me to stay out of firefights, you'd better make sure you're right there beside me.” Xandria gave him a small smile, trying her best to ease the tension that tightened his shoulders. “Besides, if I don't get to shoot anyone, how can I use the rifle you got me?”

 

Surprise lit up Bucky's mind, throwing off the rhythm of irritation and worry that had been looping through his head. His frown faded a second later and his hands relaxed on her shoulders.

 

“You're unbelievable.” Bucky's smile was slow in coming but it was bright and warm when it arrived. Xandria beamed up at him and Bucky laughed low under his breath. His hands found her hips and squeezed gently. The argument was over, at least for the moment.

 

“What can I say? I have a soft spot for men who teach me how to shoot.” She hooked her fingers into the waist of his jeans and pulled them back against one another.

 

Steve's incoming call interrupted them a few minutes later. His face appeared on the door of their fridge, courtesy of Stark smarthome technology. Xandria grumbled against Bucky's lips as the incoming-call tone rang through their kitchen. Their breakfast sat abandoned, pushed aside to create the space Xandria now occupied on the counter.

 

“FRIDAY, voice only.” Bucky threw the order out between kisses.

 

“Voice only is never a good sign. Tell me you two are about ready to join us?” Steve's vaguely annoyed voice filled the kitchen.

 

“The meeting isn't for twenty minutes, Stevie. It'll take us five to get there.” Bucky didn't even turn to face the refrigerator. He was too intent on Xandria's mouth under his.

 

“Yep, five minutes door to door. But if you two are in the middle of something -”

 

“We're not, Captain.” Xandria winked when Bucky drew back to arch a brow at her. They were technically in the middle of something, just not the something Steve had assumed. “We're dressed and ready.”

 

Steve mumbled something under his breath and Bucky snorted a short, choked laugh. It was Xandria's turn to arch a brow but Bucky only shook his head.

 

“I'll tell you later, doll,” he promised.

 

Xandria was telling the truth, despite what Steve might think. They did have all their clothes on. The fact that she was perched on the edge of the counter with Bucky's hands in her hair and his hips between her knees didn't mean that things were going to go much further. Not when they had a meeting to attend, at any rate.

 

“Just don't be late. Things are already -”

 

“Tense? Yeah, we gathered that.” Bucky smirked faintly but he took a half-step back all the same. “We'll be there early, Stevie. We're leaving in ten.”

 

“See you then.” Steve cut the call without another word.

 

“Ten?” Xandria asked. Bucky nodded and shifted his hands to her waist. He didn't even blink at her weight as he lifted her from the counter and set her back on her feet.

 

“I mighta done some damage to your curls there, sweetheart.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, a completely unrepentant grin on his face.

 

“It's not going to take me ten minutes to fix them, Bucky.” Xandria laughed and stole a brief kiss before she turned toward their room. Bucky's hands caught hers and spun her back into his arms.

 

“I might have plans to ruin 'em a little more before we go.” He danced them back toward their room and the en suite where Xandria would have to fix her hair. Xandria laughed again, softer this time. Lagos loomed in front of them but, for the next few minutes. they could pretend it was just another morning.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's playlist can be found at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/in-the-early-hours
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	3. Tides of Change

Bucky's POV

Nobody smiled when Bucky and Xandria walked into the room. Wanda must have reached out to Xandria, based on the small glance the two shared, and Steve nodded toward Bucky. But the room was otherwise silent. It was enough to draw Bucky's shoulders in on themselves. Xandria's mind was against his almost immediately, soothing sensations brushing against his awareness. Bucky nudged her mind as they sat down and she opened their connection.

Nothing about this feels right. Bucky's hand found Xandria's under the table. Her hand felt small in his, too fragile for the force it could unleash. Too fragile even for the recoil of the rifles he had personally trained her on. She shouldn't have been sitting at that table.

It's our first real mission briefing. Our first mission since Siberia. The tension is right where I expected it to be. Xandria gave his fingers a gentle squeeze. Bucky fought the urge to look at her. Nobody looked thrilled to have them there and the last thing he needed was the team to see how nervous he was. Lagos scared him, but Steve was right. Bucky needed to put The Winter Soldier in his past if he had any chance at a future. If he and Xandria had any chance at all.

“Everyone here?” Steve spoke up from the head of the table. The team stared back. There were eight seats at the table, all of them full. “Good, let's get started.” Steve nodded to Tony.

“We have received intel that a terrorist cell, likely Hydra, is planning to blow up a police station in Lagos.”

“There are several vulnerable and high-value buildings in the area,” Steve added. “We can't assume that the police station is their final target, but it's the basic premise we're going in on.”

“Well, it's the basic premise you are going in on.” Tony pointed a finger at Steve with a small lopsided smile. “I'm going to be at MIT doing a little public outreach.”

“I thought the mission was public outreach?” Xandria spoke up. Even Bucky felt the tension in the room rise a few notches.

“Layers, Xanadu. There's layers to these things.” Tony winked at her. Something in Bucky bristled but Xandria's touch filtered through his mind like a ghost and the agitation faded away. He glanced at her but she was still focused on Tony.

Steve glanced at the screen over his shoulder and an image of the police station appeared.

“This is the target as we know it. There's a series of apartment buildings and small shops that take up the rest of the block. Natasha and Wanda will set themselves up at one of the cafes. They're going to be our ground troops. Piet, you're going to stay on the move and scout the alleys that Sam won't be able to see from his position on this roof.” Steve tapped the table in front of him and the image zoomed out. A red circle appeared where each team member was supposed to wait for their target, but something was wrong.

“We're not ground forces, Stevie.” Bucky frowned at the screen, then dropped his gaze to Steve's. Bucky's circle was just to the left of the police station in a small stall that, in the image, stood empty.

“You are.” Tony cut in before Steve could respond. “Xanadu isn't going.” Xandria leaned forward in her chair, back straight and tense. Bucky couldn't feel a thing across their bridge, but she had war in her eyes.

“Steve said -”

“He's been overruled.” There was no humor in Tony's voice now.

“By who?” Xandria slowly released Bucky's hand to clasp hers together on the tabletop.

Bucky knew his girl could take care of herself. She had gone toe-to-toe with Fury more than once when Bucky had still been lost to himself. But that didn't mean he liked sitting back while she tried to put herself between him and something she felt was dangerous.

“Secretary Thaddeus Ross. You might remember him from his recent news conference?” Tony tapped a phone in his hand and Thaddeus Ross replaced the mission diagram. There was no sound, but the ticker across the bottom of the screen announced him as the new Secretary of State.

“The name rings a bell,” Xandria agreed with a small nod. “If I recall, he was directly responsible for the 'incident' that leveled Harlem and sent Banner off the grid the first time.” Tony's hands flexed on his phone, eyes tight and jaw clenched. Xandria didn't even blink.

“Xan -” Steve cut in and Xandria glanced up at him, her expression softening.

“Ross had me booted from the mission because he thinks I'm not stable enough for fieldwork. But this is the same man who had someone irradiated just to try and stop Banner. Banner, who wasn't hurting anyone. Forgive me if I don't necessarily trust his judgment.”

“What about my judgment?” Tony sat back in his chair, his arms crossed over his chest. Xandria turned her gaze back to him. Bucky slid his hand to her thigh under the table. He could feel bits of her mind laced through his but she had locked herself down.

“Do you really think I can't handle field work?” Xandria glanced over her shoulder at Bucky, then turned back to Tony. “Do I seem unstable to you?”

“You blew up Barnes' apartment, Xanadu.” Tony tapped his phone again and images of Bucky's original on-base apartment appeared on the screen. Chunks of drywall littered the floor and a band of carnage ringed the room just above the height of the bed.

Pietro snickered but nobody else made a sound. A blush flooded Xandria's face and Bucky abandoned subtlety to cover her hands with one of his.

“That was a unique situation, Stark. It's been five months and it hasn't happened again.” Bucky glared across the table but Tony only arched a brow.

“Oh really? How are the lamps in your room doing? You know, the ones linked in into the Smartsystem your quarters are equipped with? They went offline last night. Any specific reason that might have happened?”

Sam ducked his head but it didn't hide his grin. Pietro tried and failed to smother another snicker, but Wanda looked almost as mortified as Xandria did.

“A couple of lamps, really?” Bucky squeezed Xandria's hand. Her eyes were fixed on Tony and, despite the livid red of her cheeks, she felt ice cold at his side. “If she was unstable, the room would have been demolished.”

“Now you're just bragging,” Sam cut in.

“Cap said you didn't want her to go.” Tony jumped back in before Bucky had to respond.

“I don't.” Bucky frowned at Tony. “But I'm not going to let you label her 'unstable' just to keep her off the mission.”

“I'm going to Lagos.” Xandria shrugged and sat back in her chair, one hand turning over to interlace with Bucky's. Tony's gaze flicked to their joined hands before he turned to Steve.

“Back me up here, Cap.”

Steve sighed and shook his head.

“I can't, Tony. I don't agree with you.” The two men stared at each other. Xandria's hand went slack against Bucky's as her temperature spiked and he held tighter in answer. Her defenses rose around his mind as the same ghost of her touch slid through his awareness. The urge to reassure her was overwhelming.

I'm okay, doll. How are you holding up? Bucky flicked his eyes over at Xandria. She jerked in her seat, her surprised gaze sliding to him for a second before she looked back at Tony and Steve.

I'm fine. A firmer sense of her mind rubbed against his awareness and Bucky felt his shoulders ease down an inch. Are you sure you're okay? You don't normally check in like that.

Bucky threw her a confused frown but Wanda's voice cut through everything.

“I'll bond with Xandria.”

The silence in the room shifted as all eyes turned to Wanda.

“I'm sorry. You'll what?” Tony shook his head faintly.

“I...I'll bond with Xandria. We can link our minds during the mission. I can stabilize her if she needs it.”

“Do you mean when -”

“I mean if.” Wanda cut Tony off, a thin frown on her lips. Xandria's mind shifted and Bucky glanced over to see Wanda's posture relax a little. “Xandria's control during practice has gotten much better. I'd trust her to have my back in the field.”

“Seconded.” Pietro held up a hand.

“I've got no problem with it.” Sam threw Xandria a wink then shrugged as he looked over at Tony.

All eyes turned to Natasha. She looked Xandria over, then glanced at the destruction still hanging on the screen over Steve's head.

“Xandria went from gutting a room to breaking a couple of lamps in just five months. An unstable person couldn't pull off that kind of control that fast.” It was the closest thing she gave to a ringing endorsement. Tony looked from person to person before throwing one hand in the air.

“Fine. You guys want to go up against the Secretary of State, be my guest. But if one thing goes wrong with those two, he's going to put boots on the ground here and I'm not going to be able to stop him.”

“We'll just have to run that risk.” Steve shrugged. “He wanted Bucky back in the field and this is the price.” Xandria nodded, her fingers tightening on Bucky's once more.

Tony stood up from the table. His phone vanished into an inner pocket of his suit as he shook his head.

“Just remember that she's not a soldier. She hasn't seen the combat we have.” He looked at everyone but Xandria on his way out of the room. There was no door to slam, but the fading sounds of his footsteps had the same effect. Tension spiked around the table. Almost on cue, Bucky felt Xandria's soothing presence flood the room.

“We're fine, Xandria.” Steve threw her a tiny, tired smile. Xandria nodded and pulled the sensation back, though her quick glance at Wanda revealed she hadn't pulled it back from everyone.

“Change in plans. Buck, Miracle, you two are going to be on this balcony. It's got a view of three different ingress points and is shielded from view. You two stay up and out of the way unless things go south.” Steve moved the circle that had represented Bucky up the side of one building and overlaid it with another one for Xandria. The two of them nodded and Steve shut off the screen.

“Any questions?” He glanced around the room. Nobody said anything and he nodded.

“Get in some training, get some rest. We go wheels-up in twelve hours.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a companion playlist!  
> https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/tides-of-change
> 
>  
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	4. Energy Based Attacks

 

 _You're not focusing the way I showed you_. Wanda's voice was a faint but insistent reminder at the back of Xandria's mind.

 

“I'm trying,” Xandria grumbled. Her eyes were closed and she squeezed them tighter. Her arms shook as she pushed them out in front of her, brilliant red streaking her skin. The streaks grew thicker until her hands were almost entirely red, her fingertips glowing like embers. Sweat speckled Xandria's brow and she ground her teeth together as the pressure in her shoulders built, her ears ringing with it.

 

 _Let it go. Feel it flow at your command_. Wanda's confidence warmed the reminder.

 

A soft whine started in Xandria's chest, building and deepening until a roar erupted from her mouth. Deep red rivers of pressure burst from her fingers and the steel beam in front of her spun away across the hangar without taking any of the smaller weights nearby with it.

 

“You did it!” Wanda cheered. Xandria slumped against Wanda and grinned. She couldn't catch her breath and her fingers ached, but she had done it. Her power had gone where she had wanted it to. Only where she had wanted it to.

 

“Couldn't have done it without you.” Xandria slowly shifted her weight from Wanda's shoulder. She swayed on her feet for a moment and Wanda steadied her with a hand on her elbow. Xandria's smile was tired but grateful.

 

“Pretty soon we'll be unstoppable.” Wanda grinned as Xandria caught her balance.

 

“Let's hope so.” Xandria's smile faded and Wanda's grin faded with it. A brief apology flashed from Wanda's mind to Xandria's. “You didn't do anything wrong, Wanda.”

 

“I could have been a little more sensitive.” Wanda gave Xandria a small smile and turned toward the beam they trained with. She moved it back into place with little more than a few flicks of her fingers and a slight furrow in her brow.

 

“You're the most sensitive person I know.” Xandria dropped onto a bench and fished her water bottle out from underneath. They didn't move much when they trained but every muscle in her body ached and sweat darkened the fabric of her training uniform. “It's not your fault everyone thinks Bucky is a criminal.”

 

“Not everyone thinks that, Xan. And you know it.”

 

“Enough people do.”

 

The last trace of Xandria's elation vanished. Nothing could override the fear in her belly for very long. Xandria leaned her elbows on her knees, water bottle loosely clutched in her hands.

 

“I'm scared, Wanda.” Xandria bit her lip and looked down at her shoes. Wanda's mind brushed hers with sensations like a cool autumn breeze and Xandria shut her eyes.

 

“Steve isn't going to let anything happen to Bucky. Or to you.” Wanda settled onto the bench beside Xandria and slipped her arm around her friend's waist. Xandria leaned in to Wanda as the other telepath nudged at the bridge that could connect their minds. Reassurance flooded through Xandria as she opened the link, Wanda's head on her shoulder for extra contact.

 

“I hope you're right,” Xandria muttered with a sigh. She rested her cheek against Wanda's hair and took a deep breath. “Everything seemed so easy six months ago. Bucky had his mind back. All we had to do was clean up the mess and everything would be okay. But that's not how it works, is it?”

 

“No, it isn't.” Wanda tightened her grip on Xandria's waist before she eased her head off her friend's should and sat up. Xandria sat up as well and lifted her water bottle to her lips. “But maybe this mission is just an extra step. Enough little missions like this and they'll leave you guys alone again for a while.”

 

Xandria felt the worry under Wanda's reassurances. They both knew that there were factions of the US government that weren't really happy with Wanda and Pietro's amnesty within the Avengers, either. None of them had a cut and dried pass to a normal life.

 

“You're probably right.” Xandria buried her fears under a sheen of determination. Wanda's brow arched faintly but she didn't say anything. Not even as Xandria slowly withdrew from the link between their minds. “Everyone else had to go through something like this. It's just Bucky's turn.”

 

“And he'll have you there to help him.” Wanda's smile brightened a little and Xandria warmed hers in response.

 

“Absolutely.”

 

Wanda stood and offered Xandria her hand. They had another hour in the training room before they had to rotate to other stations and prepare for the mission. They had another ten hours until the jet left for Lagos. Xandria tried to shake the unease that had settled between her shoulders. Tried to bury it in the energy she threw at the pipes and concrete blocks that Wanda taught her to move at will.

 

Her unease only grew. Relief finally came in the form of Bucky when he and Steve appeared at the end of the hour. Xandria felt him before she saw him, her mind shifting toward his without any intention on her part. He was anxious, his mind spinning around itself until he felt her reaching for him. They brushed together and Xandria sighed softly. Wanda glanced over Xandria's shoulder. Her mind reached out a moment later before a frown flashed across her face.

 

“How did you feel him that soon? I can barely register him.”

 

“Familiarity, I think.” Xandria couldn't help but blush as she shrugged. A quick glance down reassured her that it was just a blush. No crimson danced under the skin of her hands.

 

“I don't think that's it.” Wanda's frown deepened. “Pietro's mind is as familiar as my own and I still can't feel him at that distance unless I am actively connected to him. Connected or searching.”

 

Xandria shrugged again, her cheeks burning a little darker.

 

“Bucky and I are...our connection is different.” Xandria crouched down to tighten the perfectly tied laces of her shoes. Anything to avoid Wanda's eyes.

 

 _Different how?_ As deep as Wanda's frown was, there was the barest hint of amusement in the words she sent to Xandria. It only made Xandria's cheeks hotter.

 

_We're...together...for one._

 

 _Fair. But that's not what you meant, is it?_ Wanda leaned back against the wall beside Xandria.

 

 _No, no it's not._ Xandria reached her senses out and found Bucky was still a minute or two out from the training room. _Our connection has a more...intimate side to it_.

 

 _Intimate. Wait wait wait, like..._ _ **Intimate?**_ Wanda's shock was almost its own voice in Xandria's head. Xandria could only groan and cover her face with her hands.

 

 _How does that even work_? Wanda began to laugh as she sank down to sit beside Xandria.

 

“It's not funny” Xandria flicked a few jolts of power at Wanda. Her friend's laughter only took on the soft shriek of someone being tickled before Wanda shook off Xandria's energy.

 

“It's **hilarious**.” Wanda looked over at Xandria's mortified face and bit her lip. She stopped giggling but amusement still sparkled in her eyes. “How...why?”

 

“It's just...more...”

 

“Intimate?” Wanda supplied and Xandria flicked another spark at her. Wanda shot one back and Xandria's scowl vanished as the energy crawled across her ribs.

 

Bucky and Steve found the two women sprawled on the floor, starbursts of energy flashing back and forth as their laughter bounced back from the walls.

 

“Uh...ladies?” Steve stopped just inside the door, his shield dangling from one hand and his brow arched. Xandria and Wanda froze, neither looking at Steve as their eyes went wide. They wore identical expressions as they struggled to stop laughing, their lips pressed into thin lines and their eyes round as coins, unblinking as if their lack of movement would render them invisible. Bucky cleared his throat when neither woman moved for a five count.

 

“Everything alright, doll?”

 

“Yeah, Buck. Everything's fine.” Xandria finally moved. She rolled onto her belly and pushed up to her hands and knees. A quick glance at the two soldiers revealed amused smiles, though Bucky's was a few shades warmer as he watched Xandria roll to her feet.

 

“I was stressed out and Wanda was -”

 

“Teasing her,” Wanda finished. “Xandria's the one that escalated to energy-based attacks.”

 

“In self-defense!” Xandria spun on her heel, mock outrage on her face. Wanda's fingertips crackled with fresh energy and the two women began to laugh all over again.

 

“Pre-mission jitters. I get it. They're different for everyone.” Steve shook his head with a faint smile. “Just don't be late to the firing range. Or the next prep station.”

 

“Yes, sir.” Wanda and Xandria chorused their agreement. Steve looked them over. He found only sincerity and nodded before he moved into the training room. Bucky hung back to slide his arm around Xandria's waist.

 

 _Are you sure you're alright, babydoll?_ He smiled down at her as his voice slipped into her mind. Xandria answered in impressions, her mind slipping around his just long enough to leave behind the relaxed happiness that lingered from goofing around with Wanda. Bucky nodded and pressed a kiss to her forehead before moving away to follow Steve.

 

Xandria watched him go until he was out of sight behind one of the huge concrete blocks she had been moving around earlier that afternoon.

 

 _Intimate, huh? I'll have to remember that._ Wanda's hand circled Xandria's arm.

 

 _You're the worst._ Xandria grumbled, but her grin softened any bite the words might have had.

 

 _You adore me!_ Wanda protested. Xandria couldn't argue with that.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The playlist for this chapter can be found on 8tracks!  
> https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/energy-based-attacks
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	5. 398.2

Xandria groaned and tipped her face back into the spray of the shower head. Her muscles felt loose in the warm, liquid way that meant she was going to be sore and stiff for days after they got back from the mission. But it also meant that she was going to be limber and endorphin-fueled when they touched down in Lagos. She was primed for the mission. The cost would just have to be paid later.

 

“You're alone in there, right?” Natasha's gentle mockery cut under the sound falling water and Xandria laughed.

 

“Yeah, Nat. I'm alone.” Xandria didn't give voice to the rest of her thoughts. It was one thing to clue Wanda in on bits and pieces of her private life with Bucky. It was something else entirely to trade dirty jokes with Natasha. Xandria loved Natasha, but Bucky had a past and Natasha was part of it. Certain things were just off-limits.

 

“At least we can be alone together.” Natasha's voice came from the stall beside Xandria's.

 

“Clint still off on a solo mission?”

 

“Third one this month.”

 

Natasha wasn't the type to bemoan the call of duty. Xandria could hear the sadness in her friend's voice all the same. She sent a tendril of comfort through the wall between them but Natasha declined it.

 

“I'll be alright, Miracle.” A smile tinged Natasha's voice. “Save the psychic hugs for Barnes.”

 

“I've got plenty of psychic hugs to go around, you know.” Xandria smiled and shook her head.

 

“Normally I'd agree, but Lagos has you both freaked. You might want to stockpile whatever emotional supports you use with him.”

 

“We're that obvious, huh?” Xandria's smile vanished. Natasha hummed but it wasn't a yes or a no.

 

“You're not shattering the lamps or anything.” The smile was back in Natasha's voice, if only for a moment. “But Barnes didn't even crack a smile on the gun range and you're trying so hard to keep your nerves together that you're practically vibrating.”

 

“And here I thought we were playing it cool.”

 

“Playing it cool usually doesn't entail putting Tony in your crosshairs.”

 

The water in Natasha's stall shut off and Xandria cut hers off too. She'd long since washed away the grime of practice and the smoke of the firing range.

 

“He said -”

 

“I was there, Xan. I know what he said. And you were right, you're stable enough for the field.”

 

The women met at the benches just outside the showers, both wrapped in towels with another towel on each of their heads. Natasha's eyes darted over the few lingering marks Bucky had left on Xandria's skin. If she had thoughts on them, she kept them to herself.

 

“I'm sensing a 'but' here.” Xandria gave Natasha a pointed look and crossed to her locker.

 

“Ross is Secretary of State. He's supposed to speak to and for the people when it comes to things like The Avengers. After the fall of SHIELD and everything in Sokovia, the last thing we need is to look like we're at odds with the US government.”

 

Xandria spun around, towel slipping from her hand in shock. It floated down slowly before snapping back up into her hand, though Xandria barely registered it leaving her fingers at all.

 

“Is this **your** opinion, or Tony's?”

 

“Both.” Natasha turned from her own locker to frown faintly in Xandria's direction. “He said it first but he's not wrong. If we want to have a home in America, we have to play ball with the federal government.”

 

“Playing ball, in this case, could mean handing Bucky over for a trial. He's a POW, Nat, but Ross is looking at him like a criminal.”

 

“I didn't say I agreed with Ross on everything.” Natasha's frown deepened. “Just that he has some valid points.”

 

The two women stared at each other across the narrow locker bay. Natasha broke first though her shrug made Xandria well aware that the other woman had chosen to relent.

 

“You're going to protect James no matter what,” Natasha said. She turned back to her locker and pulled out her jacket, the only thing left inside. “And that's good. He'd do the same for you. Just make sure it doesn't get to the point where the price is higher than anyone else is willing to pay.”

 

Natasha's steps didn't make a sound as she left. Xandria watched her go, her stomach tight. The argument felt wrong but she couldn't put her finger on the reason. Of everyone on the team, Natasha was the last person she had expected to side with Ross, but it was more than that.

 

Xandria finished dressing with a bitter taste in her mouth. She cast her mind out for Bucky and found him in the team's common room. He was clear across the base and several floors up but she felt his mind react to her touch. Her phone buzzed on the shelf of her locker a minute later.

 

“What's wrong?” The edge in Bucky's voice was oddly soothing. He was a fighter. They both were.

 

“I just had the weirdest fight with Natasha.” Saying it out loud soured Xandria's stomach all over again.

 

“About Ross?” Bucky's voice changed as he moved from the common area to somewhere smaller.

 

“Yeah. Did she talk to you too?”

 

“Kinda. Said something about keeping an open mind and not letting -”

 

“Prices get too high?” Xandria finished his sentence and Bucky growled low in confirmation.

 

“I told you this was giving me a bad feeling, babydoll.” Bucky sighed. Xandria could picture him as he scrubbed one hand over his face.

 

“I know, Buck. I'm getting one too.” Xandria pulled her phone away from her ear and glanced at the time, then finished putting on her boots. “We've got an hour until we go wheels-up. Meet me in the library?”

 

“398.2?” Bucky's smile carried in his voice and Xandria couldn't help but smile too. Even from here she felt him tugging at her, calling her back to him. He shouldn't have been able to, not from this distance and not without a solid psychic connection to boost his limited abilities. But she felt him all the same.

 

“398.2”

 

 

* * *

 

Five minutes to get across the base, three minutes to get to the proper level, and another two minutes to wind her way through the massive library meant that they had fifty minutes left by the time Xandria was pressed against Bucky's chest.

 

“Natasha, of all people. Huh.” Bucky shook his head faintly and Xandria grumbled in agreement.

 

“I thought the same thing.” Xandria's words were muffled in Bucky's t-shirt. She felt more than heard him sigh.

 

“We can talk to her after we get back. See if she still thinks we should play ball after we ace this mission.”

 

“If we ace the mission.”

 

The cold metal of Bucky's finger curled under Xandria's chin and tipped her face up until she looked him in the eye.

 

“We're going to be okay.” Bucky wouldn't let her look away until Xandria nodded faintly.

 

“I know, Buck. This whole thing is a bad idea, but we've been through worse.”

 

“Siberia?” Bucky asked.

 

“Siberia.” Xandria nodded a confirmation and stood up a little straighter to steal a kiss. Bucky's hand slid to the back of her neck and held her close, asking permission to take control of the moment. Xandria let him have it with a smile. Bucky deepened the kiss, gathering Xandria close against his chest as he sank one hand into her hair and pressed the other into the small of her back. He kept kissing her, kept brushing his thumb over her lower back until the tension melted from her shoulders.

 

“This won't be like Siberia,” Bucky murmured as his lips left hers.

 

Xandria didn't say anything. She could make jokes about the weather or her training or a million other differences between the missions but she was too scared. She laced their fingers together instead and led Bucky to a bench under a nearby window. The view looked out over one of the base's huge gardens, a spot of calm nature on a complex of chaotic military machines.

 

“Hey, look at me.” Bucky pulled her up short in front of the bench. Xandria turned to face him and tried for a smile. It just wouldn't come and she dropped her gaze to his chest.

 

Bucky cupped her face in his hands and pressed his lips to her brow. Xandria's hands wrapped around his wrists as she closed her eyes.

 

“We're going to be fine. You've got my back and I've got yours.” Bucky whispered the promises and Xandria nodded along to each one. She felt him shift back and she opened her eyes to find him looking down at her.

 

“I'll always protect you, babydoll. Whatever it takes.”

 

He pulled her into his arms before she could think of something to say. She wrapped him in her feelings instead. Her affection and trust and the need she felt to protect him too. Bucky's mind soaked it in. He gathered her into his arms and arranged them on the bench, his legs down its length and Xandria on his lap. The sun shone outside their window, highlighting the beauty of the garden. They didn't speak, mentally or physically. They didn't need to. They had forty minutes left. Forty minutes to sit together and enjoy a place that brought them peace. Forty minutes until things would change, one way or another.

 

Forty minutes until Lagos.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's companion playlist can be found at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/398-2
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	6. Flight Plans

Bucky's arm around Xandria's shoulders tightened a little more with every step they took toward the jet. He held her so tightly that her arm had nowhere to go other than around his waist by the time they reached the boarding ramp.

 

 _I go where you go. We're both safer that way. Okay?_ Xandria wrapped Bucky in her thoughts as she threw small smiles to the rest of their teammates. Nobody was happy with the mission but they were all doing their best to pretend things were normal.

 

Bucky didn't respond and she glanced up at him. The Winter Soldier looked back down at her.

 

 _Don't do that._ Xandria warmed her words with affection, soothing his reactionary flinch before he ever moved. _Things aren't that bad. Don't go down those roads unless you have to, James_.

 

Xandria wasn't sure if it was her warmth or the use of his name that brought life back to his eyes. One minute a machine stared down at her and in his next breath he was her Bucky again.

 

 _Sorry, doll. Old habits are easier than new fear, apparently._ Bucky pressed a kiss to the top of her head, then guided them to a pair of seats next to where Wanda waited.

 

 _There's nothing to be afraid of. As long as we stay together, everything will be fine._ Xandria grabbed the front of Bucky's jacket with her free hand. He let her touch swing him around until they were toe-to-toe. His arms slipped around her waist, pulling her flush against him as she went up on her toes just enough to press her lips to his.

 

“Am I going to have to separate you two?” Natasha teased from the pilot's chair. Bucky growled low in his throat, soft enough for Xandria alone to hear.

 

“I'd advise against it,” Steve answered as he boarded the jet. “Bucky gets testy when he's away from Miracle for too long.”

 

“We're right here, ya know.” Bucky smiled against Xandria's mouth despite the growl lingering in his words.

 

“That's arguable.” Steve clapped a hand on the back of Bucky's shoulder, then squeezed past him to drop into the second pilot's seat.

 

“If you two wrap it up, we can get this show on the road.” Natasha winked when Xandria looked at her over Bucky's shoulder.

 

 _You're in so much trouble when we get home_. Bucky's voice teased across Xandria's mind and a flush rose to her cheeks. He found her hands with his and guided her to her seat before dropping into his own.

 

_So you keep saying. Careful with your promises, sergeant._

 

Bucky growled aloud in response, earning an arched brow from Sam and pointed silence from the rest of the team.

 

Wanda managed not to smile but she couldn't hide her mirth when the two telepaths linked minds.

 

 _Are you two done being 'intimate'?_ Wanda's laughter tripped under her words. Xandria's cheeks flushed but her smile did not change.

 

 _That was just your run-of-the-mill affection_. Xandria rolled up the cuff of her loose cotton shirt and laid her wrist across Wanda's knee. _You're not going to find out anything else about me and Bucky unless you go digging. I would strongly advise against it_.

 

 _Noted_. Wanda shook her head with a grin. She traced Xandria's wrist with two fingers, searching for the strongest pulse point. Her finger pressed down as soon as she found it, both women closing their eyes at the same moment.

 

“Do either of you want to explain what you're about to do?” Steve called back. Xandria waited until the ramp finished whining to a close before she answered him.

 

“Jean and the Professor have been working on a way to boost my control since they came to visit me after Siberia.”

 

Bucky reached for Xandria's free and laced their fingers together, then squeezed gently. Xandria squeezed back and kept her grip tight.

 

“The last time Wanda went back home with me, Jean figured out that we could create a durable, elastic link between our minds. If Wanda has the dominant role, she can suppress my secondary mutation when my control fails.”

 

“It's not a permanent solution,” Wanda added. “It's exhausting, but it might keep her from letting loose at the wrong time.”

 

“So it's a fail-safe?” Natasha asked.

 

“At its core, yes.” Xandria nodded, her eyes still closed.

 

“Fury would be so proud,” Steve muttered. Someone snorted back a laugh.

 

 _Why are you thinking about pixies_? Wanda's confusion brushed across Xandria's mind. Xandria almost laughed.

 

 _I'll explain after the mission_. _Let's get this link settled_.

 

The women began to breathe in unison, their heads back and their bodies slowly relaxing into the seats save for Wanda's grip on Xandria's wrist. Xandria's awareness shivered as a red haze slid over everything, Wanda's power extending to include Xandria.

 

 _You're less resistant to this than you used to be. You've been practicing_. Wanda squeezed Xandria's wrist gently.

 

 _Sort of_. Xandria tried and failed to suppress a small cringe, her cheeks warming once again. _Bucky and I...sometimes I let him take control of our bond. It feels a lot like this._

 

Wanda's surprise washed over her before her friend remembered to reign it back in. Connected like this, with Wanda in control, Xandria had little choice in how much of Wanda's output she received.

 

 _So that's what you meant by intimate. I am definitely going to have to remember that_.

 

Xandria tightened her grip on Bucky as Wanda's awareness found his connection to Xandria's mind. All three of them held their breath as Wanda worked to form her shield for Xandria without cutting off Bucky's connection. Long seconds ticked by and with each passing breath Xandria's fingers pulsed a little tighter around Bucky's.

 

 _Got it!_ Wanda cheered. Her shield snapped into place around Xandria's mind, Bucky's connection intact.

 

The red haze around Xandria's awareness faded as the edges of her senses feathered into Wanda's. Both women opened their eyes in the same moment and Sam jerked in surprise when their eyes focused on him. He looked from one woman to the other and frowned.

 

“Why do I get the impression that I'm only talking to one person right now?”

 

“We're still two people,” Xandria said.

 

“Our senses are just blended,” Wanda added.

 

“Sort of like getting a fish-eye view all the time,” they finished together.

 

“Oh yeah,” Sam said with a nod. “Because the Doublemint twin thing isn't creepy at all.”

 

“What's wrong, Sam?” Xandria asked. Wanda's fingers slid from her wrist to her hand and interlaced with Xandria's as the women stood in tandem.

 

“Don't you like twins?” Wanda added as she and Xandria tipped their heads to the side at the same moment, identical smiles on their faces.

 

“Oh, hell no. Steve!” Sam shooed the women away with both hands. They turned in the same moment to look at Steve, their smiles fixed and cold.

 

Steve looked from one woman to the other, then past them to Sam.

 

“You gave them an opening. They ran with it. I'm not getting involved.” He grinned and shook his head. Sam frowned at him, confused. His gaze snapped back to the linked telepaths as they turned their fixed stares on him once more. Xandria and Wanda exchanged a glance before breaking down in giggles.

 

“Haha, real funny. See if you're still laughin' when one of you needs an extraction and I don't feel like sharing my wings,” Sam huffed. The effect was ruined by the faint twitch of a smile on his lips.

 

Wanda only grinned at him as Xandria dropped onto Bucky's knee, shoulders shaking with suppressed giggles.

 

“Don't tease the bird, doll. That's my job.” Bucky slid an arm around Xandria's waist and grinned at Sam across the jet. Wanda hummed softly as the ghost of Xandria's happiness slid through her mind. A sense of Bucky chased it and Wanda's laughter slowly faded. Bucky wasn't looking at her, wasn't connected to her at all. His eyes and focus were on Xandria as the two murmured back and forth in low tones.

 

“What's wrong?” Pietro was at Wanda's elbow a breath later.

 

“I felt him,” she murmured. “Bucky. But I shouldn't be able to, not unless he's in her mind.”

 

“He can do that though, can't he? With her at least?” Pietro glanced over at the couple and rested a hand on his sister's shoulder.

 

“Not when I'm in control like this.” Wanda's frown deepened. “It's like he's part of her, or she's part of him, literally.”

 

“Is that dangerous?” Pietro squeezed his sister's shoulder before guiding her back toward their seats.

 

“I don't know.” Wanda shook her head. “But I'm worried, Piet. Something's not right.”

 

“Talk to her after the mission. Then the two of you can call Jean if there's a problem. Maybe she can figure it out.”

 

The twins dropped back into their seats and Wanda gave her brother a small, grateful smile.

 

 

“Right,” she murmured. “After the mission. We'll have plenty of time after the mission.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The companion playlist for this chapter can be found at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell/flight-plans
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	7. Dawn

_Am I still coming through?_ Bucky's voice rang across the connection between their minds. The teasing lilt to his tone had a smile on Xandria's face before she thought to stop herself.

“Buck, Miracle, minds on the mission.” Steve snapped from across the map the team had huddled around.

“Sorry, Stevie.” Bucky's actual voice held none of the teasing tone that his mental voice did. Xandria dropped her eyes to the map, cheeks red. She felt Steve's eyes on them a few moments more.

“Everyone knows their positions?” Steve went on. A general murmur went around the group as a few people nodded. “This should be fairly straight-forward. A PR move. Just like Tony said.”

“And if it goes south?” Bucky reached for Xandria's hand as he spoke. Their minds were connected enough that she knew he was unaware he'd reached out. It had simply been instinct.

“If it goes south, you and Miracle head back to the jet. The rest of the team will meet up after we secure the area.” Steve leveled his gaze on Bucky. “I don't want either of you to see combat. Today is not that day.”

Bucky nodded but his fingers tightened around Xandria's. His mind pulled in on itself. He would have read as unconscious to a telepath unless they could see him. Xandria's own mind seemed to buzz faster in response. It was an uncomfortably familiar sensation and Xandria blinked fast to will it away.

 _Are you okay?_ Wanda's voice whispered through Xandria's mind. The buzz faded and Xandria took a deep breath.

 _Yeah. It must be the stress getting to me. For a second there it felt like...like..._ Xandria struggled to put it into words but her friend answered for her.

Images and memories of early life, of the struggle each woman had faced at the onset of their abilities. New telepaths never find their way easily, humanity filling their minds like the buzz of angry bees. Xandria caught Wanda's eye across the map and flashed a small smile of thanks. It was good to have a friend that truly understood.

A beep cut through the cabin as the jet neared Lagos. Steve and Natasha moved to the pilots' seats and switched control back to manual. The rest of the team found their seats, eyes down and hands busy with weapons and equipment checks. Bucky pulled Xandria's rifle from its case and looked it over.

“I checked it twice before we boarded, Buck,” Xandria murmured.

“Always check three times.”

“Why three?”

Bucky glanced up at her, his cheeks flushed.

“Just an old superstition,” he mumbled. “My ma always said to check three times. Didn't matter if it was a roast or missing keys or … anything, really. You always did it in threes.”

“Must be an old Irish thing,” Xandria murmured.

“Probably. A lot of folks carried over stuff like that with they immigrated.”

Bucky's voice was low and even. His mind was calm. Xandria smiled as she leaned in and brushed her lips across the stubble on his cheek. Surprise shivered across his mind and a blush warmed the skin beneath Xandria's lips.

“A kiss just for checking your rifle?” He teased. “What do I get if I pack you a parachute?” He laughed at his own joke, a heavy rumble low in his chest. Xandria could only sit back and smile, warmth sinking into her bones for the first time since finding Steve in their living room the night before.

“A kiss for being you.” She slowly took the rifle from his hands, checked the scope, then set the weapon aside. “Six months ago you never would have told me about your mother.”

“Six months ago I could barely remember my mother.” Bucky glanced around at the rest of the team. When he found nobody looking he dragged Xandria into his lap. “But I got lucky and found you.”

It was Xandria's turn to blush. She wanted to tell him she loved him. It felt like something she should say before they stepped out of the jet and into the mission. But the jet landed before she could gather up her courage. Bucky slipped one hand into her hair and drew her in for a kiss, trapping her words between their lips.

“Am I going to have to separate you two?” Steve shook his head as he moved to the back of the jet. Bucky chuckled again even as Xandria felt a flash of irritation trip across his mind.

“We're ready to go, Steve. But you can't fault me for giving my best girl a kiss before this whole thing gets going.”

“Can I fault you?” Sam flashed a grin when Bucky met his eyes.

Steve opened the rear ramp and cute the banter short. Early morning sunlight spilled into the cabin as the ramp lowered. It felt like a small sun was rising just for them, but it didn't feel like a fresh new day. Xandria watched the sunrise over Steve's shoulder and couldn't help but feel like something was about to end.

She reached for Bucky's hand and held on tight, even after Bucky glanced down at her, brows drawn. His mind nudged hers when she wouldn't look at him and all Xandria could do was shake her head. She couldn't explain her fear to him, not when she couldn't explain it to herself. All she could do was hold on tight to Bucky's hand as Steve led them out into the light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	8. Lagos

Xandria shifted from one knee to the other. The world bobbed on the other end of her scope.

“Lock it up, Miracle. I can see your scope glinting from here.” Sam's voice crackled into her ear.

Xandria settled the rifle more firmly against her shoulder.

“You're literally across the street from me, the sun at your back. I'd be worried if you  **couldn't**  see my scope.”

“Hear that, Buckaroo? Your girl worries about me.”

Bucky snorted thought he didn't move an inch. The heel of his boot pressed firmly into the heel of Xandria's. It helped them keep track of the other person for tactical reasons but it also reassured him she was still there. Xandria didn't want him to know how much it reassured her too.

“She oughta worry. Keep talkin' like that -”

“And Xandria will knock him off the roof?” Wanda cut in. Xandria grinned as Sam chuckled into his radio.

“Somethin' like that.” Bucky's grin carried into his voice. His mind reached for Xandria's, rubbing against hers like a cat before he pulled back once more.

 _No need to get possessive, soldier_ , Xandria teased.

 _Not possessive. Just feeling a little amorous is all_. Bucky pressed his boot against hers more firmly and Xandria settled into her rifle as an odd kind of contentment bounded back and forth across their bond. Neither of them wanted to be in Lagos. But a little bit of teasing and a little bit of territorial affection felt natural enough to calm their nerves.

The team had been in place for two and a half hours. Wanda and Natasha were staked out in a cafe close to the assumed target while Sam kept lookout on top of one of the taller buildings. Pietro was off somewhere running laps and Steve was holed up in an apartment across from the police station. Bucky and Xandria were on a balcony across from Sam's position. The building stood on a corner which left Xandria and Bucky belly-down on the balcony, each with a rifle sighted down either side of the intersection.

Wanda's voice crackled over the radio as she began her report. Xandria tried to pay attention but it was the same report she'd given every half hour since they'd settled into their positions. Natasha cut in at some point and Xandria took a second to squeeze her eyes shut and let her head hang. She bit back a sigh as the muscles in the back of her neck slowly relaxed.

“You alright, doll?”

Xandria looked up and found Bucky watching her over his shoulder.

“Just a sore neck. I'll be alright.” She flashed him a smile and he grinned.

“How about I rub it for you when we get back? You, me, the tub, a massage -”

Bucky cut off as Steve's voice came across the radio, harsh and sudden.

“Sam, see that garbage truck? Tag it.”

Bucky tensed against his rifle. His mind skittered like a needle jumping across a record as he shifted his attention back to the mission.

“Yeah, that truck's loaded for max weight. And the driver's armed.” Sam's report sent a chill down Xandria's spine.

“It's a battering ram.” Natasha's voice confirmed Xandria's fear. The spy was too neutral, too calm. A battering ram didn't fit with the reports they'd had. Which meant the mission had just gone wrong.

“Go now.” Steve's order had both Bucky and Xandria on their feet.

“What?' Wanda's voice dimmed into static as her mic picked up the rush of Pietro's arrival.

Sam launched himself off the roof. His wings flashed red and silver the late morning light and then he was gone.

“He's not hitting the police.” Even from this distance, Steve's mind shrieked with alarm.

“The Center for Infectious Disease? Really? Why wasn't that our  **first**  guess?” Sam growled.

 _Jet. Move. Now_. Bucky's voice was in Xandria's mind. His clipped tone matched the iron grip of his fingers around her arm.

“The police station houses Hydra assets seized by the local government. Ross was sure Hydra would want them back.” The thud of Steve's boots was the only indication he was running. His words came out just as clearly as when he stood still.

“Can we stop listening to Ross? Please?” Xandria, on the other hand, sounded more than a little winded as she and Bucky made their way down the three flights of stairs to the ground floor.

Nobody answered her. Steve, Sam, Wanda, and Pietro had made it to the invasion point. Their coms link filled with updates on the number of hostile targets, weapons, and collateral damage.

“Buck, Miracle, you guys are running solo. We need the twins here.” Strain crept into Steve's voice as his shield clanged off something that thudded to the ground a second later.

“Copy.” Bucky's reply was as sharp as his thoughts.

“Buck. Bucky.” Xandria tried to pull her wrist from his grip. His fingers only tightened against her skin. “James!”

Bucky pulled up short. His face bore no expression when he turned to her but his mind was a blur. Xandria couldn't even pick up individual thoughts. Just impressions and fear. And rage.

“James.” Xandria grabbed a fist full of his shirt and tried to pull him closer. Her mind wrapped around his but should couldn't find a way in. He had closed himself off.

“It's not safe.”

“The team has Hydra covered. My concern is you -”

“Not the mission. Here, me.” Bucky tapped the side of his head. “I'm not slipping, doll. I promise. But I'm... I'm not me, either. So stay out, okay?”

Xandria flinched. Bucky's mind skipped over and his eyes softened for the briefest moment. But his expression hardened the second they picked up the sound of gunfire

“Just until we get home.” He turned away and scanned the street in front of them. “It'll all be okay when we get home.”

Another round of gunfire had Bucky's pistol in his hand. He still wouldn't let go of Xandria's wrist and she growled under her breath in frustration. She shrugged her rifle across her back and lunged ahead to grab Bucky's second pistol. He didn't even slow down.

_Did you add this one for me?_

Her thought bounced off the shield around his mind. And that scared her more than every Hydra agent in Lagos.

The crowd parted in front of them, fear on every face. Xandria desperately dug through her memories until she found a store of calm resolve. It rolled out from her like a shockwave. The faces they passed no longer held terror, but the people still ran away from the destruction billowing out from the battle.

But the calm did nothing to slow Bucky's pace or ease his grip on her wrist. His fear thrummed around him like an aura. It made Xandria's stomach roil and her shoulders ache.

They turned a corner and found the road blocked by more of the yellow trucks Hydra had used to invade the Center. Four soldiers guarded the trucks. Bucky dropped two before any of them registered his arrival. Xandria cast her mind against the remaining soldiers and grimaced.

“Hydra to the death,” she growled. Bucky dropped them too. Xandria did her best not to look at them as they ran past the blockade and into the intersection beyond.

“Buck, update.” Steve's voice cut into their flight.

“Half a mile from the jet and moving fast. Dropped the guards at a blockade. ETA -”

Bucky jumped back as an armored car screeched around the corner and stopped. Shock loosened his grip and Xandria pulled her wrist free.

“Bonus round.”

Xandria knew that voice. It haunted enough of Bucky's nightmares that it was burned into her brain.

“And you have your pet freak. This is too good.” Rumlow's voice was unmistakable even through his mask. He hoisted himself out of his spot behind the machine gun atop his truck.

“I've got eyes on Rumlow.”

Steve swore as Bucky called in his report.

“Too late, tin man,” Rumlow laughed.

Minds rushed toward them. Xandria wheeled to find a line of Hydra soldiers blocking the way back to the trucks.

“By the time Rogers finds us, we'll be gone.” Rumlow advanced toward them. “You and your little girlfriend. There's someone who wants to meet you two.”

Bucky's mind stuttered again. Xandria waited for it to get back on track. It didn't. Panic bolted up her spine as Bucky's mind began to spiral. She wrapped her mind around him but he was still locked down tight.

“Stay with me, Sergeant.” Xandria shifted until she and Bucky stood back to back.

“Don't worry, sugar. We'll keep you two together. Wanna see how you made him into a real boy!” Rumlow moved closer. He didn't even look at the gun in Bucky's hand.

“Shoot him, James!”

“Too many.” Bucky's free hand reached back for hers. “I shoot him, they shoot you. Can't risk it.”

“Smart move. Good to see someone in your outfit has brains.”

Panic narrowed Xandria's vision. Heat burrowed under her skin. For one brief second, she wished they were back in Siberia. It was easier there. She just had to let go and let her fear take over. But Lagos had too many civilians.

Her gaze locked onto the yellow trucks that had barred their path. Heat pooled in her fingers and she channeled as much of it away from Bucky as she could. She pushed at Bucky's mind one more time and he finally cracked his awareness open to hers. Chaos spilled out, coated in violence and fear. Xandria waded through it until she found Bucky – her Bucky – at the core of it all.

_On my signal, throw us left. Your left._

Confusion swirled into the mix of his emotions but his fingers tightened on hers.

Xandria's fingers burned.

“Holy shit!” One of the soldiers spotted the livid glow as Xandria dropped the pistol and raised her hand.

She felt Wanda pull on her mind and struggled against her friend's control. Wanda's awareness reached for Xandria's and understanding loosened Wanda's grip.

_Now!_

Bucky threw himself to the side and his grip on Xandria dragged her along. His body rolled over hers and she struggled to keep her arm free. Brilliant crimson force snapped out from her fingers and wrapped around one truck. It shot forward. Three soldiers screamed as the vehicle mowed them down. The rest dove out of the way and the truck flew straight at Rumlow.

“Bitch!” He dove away, body tucked in a roll. But he wasn't fast enough. He screamed all the same as the truck's front wheels caught one leg and dragged him forward a few feet before Xandria's powers lost control. The truck slid to a stop. Rumlow's curses filled the street as he pulled himself free and limped up to stand on his one good foot.

“Fucking freak!”

Bucky pushed up onto his knees. He twisted and brought his gun up in one swift motion. The report of his pistol seemed to echo back. It wasn't until fire blossomed between Xandria's ribs that she realized what had happened. It wasn't as bad as she expected, at least not at first. She pressed her hand to the entry point as all the heat fled from her fingertips.

“Buck, Miracle,  **move**.” Steve sprinted around the corner. Xandria caught a glimpse of him as he leapt off the hood of the truck and dragged Rumlow to the ground. Rumlow cursed again, Bucky's bullet still lodged in his shoulder.

Bucky reached back for Xandria and she let him pull her to her feet. She got three steps before pain burned through her from head to toe and she hit her knees.

“We gotta move -” Bucky turned to her and froze.

Xandria felt it when his eyes found the blood on her shirt, on her hand. Hatred, rage, disbelief. And fear. So much fear that it choked Xandria like a hand around her throat.

“Buck,  **NOW**.”

Steve beat Rumlow back to his knees as the man struggled to regain his feet. Wanda appeared overhead, the aura of her power surrounding the Hydra agents Xandria hadn't managed to crush with the truck. One of them had shot her, Xandria was sure of it. Their minds beat frantically against her control and then they were gone, frozen in whatever personal nightmare Wanda had found for them. She touched down a few feet from Xandria, heading for Steve.

“Get to the j-” She stumbled to a stop when she processed the blood on Xandria's hands. Wanda's mind reeled as she called for Piet. All Xandria could do was close her eyes as her mind reeled too.

“Stop, please.” She thought her voice sounded slurred but she couldn't be sure. “I can't... the pain...my shields.”

Calm flooded Xandria's mind as Wanda asserted her control.

 _It'll be okay_. Wanda's voice in Xandria's head was much more assured than the look on her face.

“Hate to break this up. But I gotta go.” Rumlow crawled to his knees and stopped. “And I'm not going alone.”

Panic filled the street as he primed the bombs strapped to his chest. Xandria's own fear resurfaced as Wanda's focus shifted from her friend to the massacre Rumlow had planned. Wanda's hands snapped out and her power surrounded Rumlow as a fireball erupted out from his chest. His scream of pain echoed back from every building but not one face held pity. Not from the team, not from the people huddled in doorways and behind vehicles.

Wanda grimaced and her hands began to shake. She glanced at Xandria and waited for a nod before her control vanished from Xandria's mind. All of her focus was on Rumlow as she sent him hurtling into the sky. Away from the huddled people. Away from the team. But not far enough away.

He exploded before he cleared the building. Debris and paper rained down as the people inside screamed. For all the chaos above them, the square was thrown into stunned silence. Steve broke it first, his eyes on the flames and the victims silhouetted against them.

“Sam, we need... fire and rescue... on the south side of the building.” He took off running. One hand waved back at Wanda. “We need to get up there.”

Wanda stood frozen in place, one hand smothering the silent scream of horror that contorted her features. Pietro appeared at her side, a hand on her shoulder for half a heartbeat before he took off after Steve.

“We gotta... the jet. Gotta get you to the jet.” Bucky glanced up at the building, then back at Xandria. His voice tugged Wanda from her horrified revery and she turned back to them.

“I'll.. help. I can help.” Her voice trembled with tears.

Bucky took Xandria's rifle and slung it across his back, then gathered Xandria into his arms as she reached for her friend.

“Help them. They need heroes. That's you. The structure... make it strong. That sort of thing.” Xandria gave her a friend a shock-drunk smile.

“Where's Ste – oh shit.” Sam touched down at Wanda's side.

“He's inside,” Wanda answered, though she didn't look away from Xandria until her friend's mind nudged her toward the fire.

“I'll be okay. Helen can handle this. Go!” Xandria waved both of her friends off. They cast one look back at Bucky, then took off toward the fire.

“Stevie, I'm taking the jet.”

“Tony already has another on its way. We'll meet you back at base.” Steve didn't ask for details and Bucky wouldn't have changed his mind even if Steve had.

“Does it hurt?”

Xandria thought for a moment, then shook her head. Bucky swore and shifted into a sprint. The speed jostled Xandria against Bucky's chest and she knew it should have hurt but it didn't.

“Hold on, okay? Don't go anywhere.”

“I go where you go, Sergeant.” Xandria bit back a giggle as she realized she had said the same thing to Steve the night before and to Bucky that morning in their kitchen. Though it didn't feel like that morning. It felt like last week or last year.

“I'm going home. So you're gonna go home with me and then we'll go to the medics and they'll fix you up. Right as rain, babydoll.”

They reached the jet. Bucky gently laid her across the benches in the back. He hesitated, his hands hovering over her wound, and she nudged his mind with hers.

“Go,” she mumbled with a smile. “Go fly us home.”

Anguish filled his mind and overflowed across their bond. Xandria drew it in, away from Bucky.

“I'll still be here when we get there, soldier. I promise.”

“Keep your promises, babydoll.” Bucky leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead. She felt his frown and realized how cold she felt. Then he was gone, up in the pilot's seat, and the jet rumbled to life beneath her.

The ramp whirred to a close as Bucky guided the jet up into the air. Xandria watched as the doors gave her an early sunset until the darkness settled in around her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	9. Hard Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is where the angst really starts to kick in...

“Your team had one objective, Mr. Rogers.”

“Captain Rogers.”

Ross ignored Pietro's interjection as easily as Pietro ignored Steve's warning glare.

“Your team was to go in, stop a small Hydra cell, and get out. Maybe Barnes and Wesson get a few photos taken as they arrest Hydra agents.”

Bucky shifted against the leather of his seat. Xandria's blood had left dull streaks across the silver of his arm and stiff stains down the front of his shirt. But there hadn't been time to change. Helen's team met them the moment he opened the rear of the jet. They'd rushed to the medical wing and Bucky had stayed at Xandria's bedside until Steve showed up and dragged him into this meeting.

“We had bad intel.” Steve's voice was quiet and controlled when he replied. Bucky marveled that Steve could sound so calm even when the man's fists were clenched against his thighs.

“Bad intel should not have led to the casualties we saw in Lagos. Bad intel is no excuse for Wesson to take a bullet.”

Bucky flinched and pressed a fist to his mouth to stop his retort in its tracks.

 _My fault. All my fault. Keep her safe. My only job was to keep her safe_. The blame had looped through his head for the last hour.

“Something to say, Mr. Barnes?” Ross stopped across the table from Bucky.

“ **Sergeant**  Barnes.” Pietro cut in again, a faint edge to his voice. Ross ignored him again.

Bucky looked up over the fist still pressed to his mouth. He wanted to say something, but nothing helpful came to mind. Everything that did come to mind was not something he should say to the Secretary of State. Not when the man had a half-dozen armed guards posted around the room.

“Buck and Miracle were heading back for the jet -”

“Miracle. That's her codename, right?” Ross gave Bucky a final dark look before he rounded back on Steve.

“It's technically Miss Miracle, but mostly I just call her Xanadu.” Tony spoke for the first time. He bit absently at the corner of one thumb nail, his gaze distant.

“Well do you want to know what Professor Xavier calls her? Or Jean Grey? Or Logan, the one they call Wolverine? Incredibly powerful mutants, every single one of them. They call her family.” Ross stopped and tapped on the end of the table. A camera feed came to life, the lens focused on Xandria as she slept in one of Helen's regeneration units.

“Their kin was shot working with the Avengers. That's the sort of thing that leads to city-leveling incidents.”

“Xandria knew the risks when she joined the team. So did her family.” Steve leveled a cold look on Ross but the man seemed unmoved.

“That won't stop them from leveling this base if they feel like it.” He turned back to Bucky. “What happened, Mr. Barnes? You're supposed to be an expert tactician.”

Rage boiled up in Bucky's chest. He opened his mouth to speak and stopped as Xandria's presence filled his senses. His eyes flicked to the monitor above Ross' head. Xandria was clear across the compound and still asleep but Bucky felt her winding around his mind as if she sat beside him. His rage faded as his mind reached for hers. But every time he got closer, the sense of her faded a little more.

“I'm waiting, Mr. Barnes.”

Bucky forced his gaze away from the screen and back to Ross.

“The video from the surrounding cameras was clear enough. Bucky didn't fail the team. Our intel did.” Steve shifted in his chair. It looked casual enough but Bucky knew his friend. Steve was ready for a fight.

“Barnes has fought his way out of worse. I don't see -”

“With all due respect, Mister Secretary, I don't think you've seen the things Bucky has. He did the best with what they were given.” Steve slowly leaned forward in his seat. “Both he and Xandria tried to tell us something was off about this mission. We didn't listen. That's not on them. That's on us. And on the intel.”

The meaning of Steve's words finally hit the older man.

“Do you think I deliberately give you bad intel, Mr. Rogers?”

“Not deliberately, no. But bad intel comes from somewhere. It might be a good idea to check your supply line.”

The words were casual. That didn't stop the tension in the room from climbing several degrees.

“I think that's enough for one day. Steve, why don't you and Manchurian -”

Bucky didn't hear the rest of Tony's sentence. He was already out the door on his way to the medical wing. Xandria's presence danced just out of reach, hurrying him on. Footsteps sounded behind him but he didn't slow. Not even when Steve caught up with him.

“Buck, what's going on?”

“I can feel her, Steve. But...but it's not right. It's like she's a...” Bucky couldn't say the word  _ghost_. The meaning was too final. Steve understood all the same. He grabbed Bucky's arm and forced his friend to stop as he came around to stand before him.

“She's going to be fine. Helen said as much before we went into the meeting. You saw her on the screen. She's alive, Buck. She just has to sleep off the sedative.”

“This time, Stevie. She got out alive  **this time**. But what about next time? Or the time after that? She's not safe with... with...”

“Don't do this, Buck. I know what you're going to say but you're wrong.”

“What if I'm not? What if I'm right and she... and next time -”

“We all knew the risks when we signed on.” Steve frowned when Bucky shook his head.

“She never signed on for battle. She came here to fix me. She stayed here because I -”

“Because she chose you. And you chose her. You both knew where it would lead.”

“I don't want to do this anymore, Steve. The battles, the death, the risk.”

Bucky tried to step around Steve but stopped when his friend grabbed his arm again. Steve led him to a darkened meeting room and closed them inside.

“That's the price of staying here, Buck. SHIELD isn't in control anymore, not like we thought it would be. So now have to play ball -”

“What if we left? Just took off and disappeared?”

“You can't be serious.” Steve's frown deepened.

“I can't stay, Steve. They're gonna keep pushing me into fights until I crack.”

“That's what Miracle is -”

“Don't call her that!” Bucky's fists clenched before he caught himself. “She's not a goddamn miracle, she's a person. A woman. Just...just a woman.”

“She's your woman, Buck. She loves you.”

Bucky flinched. They had never said the words but he knew. And that's why he had to do this. Even though it was going to kill him.

“I know she does. And that's why I'm leaving. Because one day her luck is going to run out and she'll die trying to protect me.”

“That's no -”

“It's exactly how it'll end, Steve. The best I ever could have hoped for would be watching her grow old and die while I stay just like this.” Bucky waved at himself, disgust in his eyes. “No kids, no family. Just me. And that's our  **best**  ending. People like me don't get happy endings. And with Ross gunning for me, it's almost a guarantee. She'll die and it'll be my fault.”

“So what are you going to do about it? What  **can**  you do about it?”

Bucky hung his head. Tears pricked at his eyes but he blinked them back with a bitter laugh.

“No.” Steve heard everything in Bucky's laugh. “You can't go out there alone. They'll think you went rogue and hunt you down. Or Hydra will catch wind and then you'll never be safe.”

“It's better than painting a bullseye on Xan's back. I can't do it to her, Stevie. I... I love her too much for that.”

“Have you told her that?” Steve sighed when Bucky shook his head. “Are you going to?”

“Why? So she'll have that to hang on to when I leave? So she can get herself killed or captured coming to look for me? No. No, she doesn't know.”

“She's a telepath, Buck. I'm sure she picked up on it.”

“Telepath with a conscience. She taught me how to shield my thoughts, even from her. She's never had a clue.”

“This is wrong.”

“It's the best I can do, Steve. I promised I'd protect her, whatever it took. Lagos showed me that I can't do that and stay with her. If I take her with me, Ross and Hydra will both go after her. This is the only way I can keep my promise.”

They stood in silence. Bucky's harsh breathing filled the space between them. Steve stared at his friend, willing him to change his mind. But Bucky only stared at his boots and tried to ignore Xandria's bloodstains on his shirt.

“When did you want to leave?”

Bucky's head snapped up. He frowned until Steve shook his head. Neither man was going to change his mind.

“In the morning. I can't...I need one more night. With her.”

“I get it.” Steve sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Don't tell anyone, okay? They'll either report it to Tony who might report it to Ross or they'll tell Xandria. And then this whole plan blows up. I'll leave a message that will deliver when we're clear of the compound or...something. I'll figure it out.”

Steve turned to open the door but stopped when Bucky's hand landed on his shoulder.

“Am I doing the right thing? Leaving her?”

“Honestly? I think it's the dumbest idea you've ever had. And I think you're going to regret it for the rest of your life. But something tells me that isn't going to change your mind.” Steve shook his head. “My guess is you make it a month before you come back to her. And that's if she doesn't find you first. What you two have... it's not the kind of thing you can walk away from.”

Sadness clung to Steve's every word and Bucky knew Steve's own heartbreak brought this all too close to home.

“It's for the best, Steve. For her and for the team.”

“We'll see, Buck. We'll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	10. Keeping Promises

Xandria felt Bucky's mind before she felt anything else.

“Hey, soldier.” She smiled as she opened her eyes. Bucky rocked forward in his chair at the sound of her voice. He forced a smile as he rested his brow against hers.

“Hey, babydoll.” His whispered words teased against his lips and Xandria tipped her head back. Something about Bucky's kiss set off a flicker of alarm in her mind. It was too hard, too hungry. But Xandria pushed her fear away and chalked it up to the drugs.

“I hate to interrupt.”

They drew apart and looked over to find the doctor standing in the doorway to Xandria's room.

“We noticed Xandria was awake and I wanted to check in.” Dr. Cho smiled as she came moved to the free side of Xandria's bed, a tablet in her hands. “Your vitals are all stable. There was some internal damage but we took care of that.”

“Do I get a battle scar? I've heard guys dig chicks with scars.” Xandria threw Bucky a half-awake wink. He couldn't help but laugh softly when it came out more of a blink. Xandria giggled.

“No scars, not this time anyway.” Dr. Cho laughed. “Though the drugs should stay in effect for a little while longer. So you at least get that much!”

“Oh goody!” Xandria turned to Bucky as Dr. Cho began to check her wounds. “This will be just like that one party Tony made us go to. The one where I drank too many sidecars. Do you remember?”

“I remember, darlin'. You were a giggly mess all night.” Bucky brushed his lips across her forehead. “It was adorable.”

“Well prepare for act two, mister.” Xandria reached for him, then stopped at a soft tsk from the doctor.

“Hold still, Miss Wesson. I need to make sure the wound healed properly.” Dr. Cho threw out a small smile to soften the words. “And the drugs will only last a little while. You'll be back to your usual self in an hour or so.”

* * *

 

It turned out that Doctor Cho and her team needed about an hour to get Xandria fixed up and discharged from the medical wing. Steve called once while Bucky waited at Xandria's bedside but Bucky let the call go to voicemail. A text message popped up a moment later. It simply read “+1” with Wilson's picture attached.

“Something wrong?” Xandria asked when Bucky frowned at his phone.

“Nothing, babydoll. Just wrapping up the mission's fallout.”

Xandria let it go until they were back in their own apartment.

“Buck, about that text...” Xandria bit her lip as Bucky closed the front door. “They're not blaming you, are they? It was all my fault and -”

“Your fault?” Bucky frowned. Xandria looked away with a blush as she nodded.

“I tried to grab both trucks but I just didn't have the control. If I'd trained harder I could have -”

Bucky stopped her words with a kiss, his hands buried in her hair. Her mind pushed gently at his but he only deepened the kiss and pressed closer against her body until she relaxed into him.

“You were amazing.” Bucky whispered the words against Xandria's lips. He drew back just enough to meet her eyes and brushed one thumb across the softness of her cheek. “You shouldn't even have been there, babydoll. But you went, just to keep me safe. You had my back and you were amazing.”

“Of course I went.” A frown tugged at Xandria's lips. Something felt off. But Bucky's shields, the drugs, and her own fatigue made it impossible for her to pinpoint what it was. “Bucky, what's wrong?”

Bucky opened his mouth, then closed it again. The smells of battle still clung to them both and he was suddenly very aware that Xandria would see her own blood every time she looked at him until they cleaned off.

“I'm just tired, darlin'. I thought I was gonna lose you there for a minute.”

“I'm not going anywhere, Sergeant.” Xandria wrapped her arms around Bucky and laid her head on his chest as if to assure him she was telling the truth. “I told you: I go where you go.”

Her reassurance calmed Bucky, but not for the reasons Xandria envisioned. The battles would never stop for him and Xandria meant what she said. She would follow him into every single one of them until her luck ran out. And it would be his fault. Her promise proved that he had made the right choice. Leaving was the only way to keep her safe.

Bucky cradled Xandria in his arms, nose buried in her hair to find her true scent under the smoke and iron. She smelled so good, like vanilla and the faintest hint of coconut. She smelled like home. Bucky was going to miss it.

“Let's get cleaned up, huh?” Bucky forced himself to smile when Xandria looked up at him. He'd never lied to her before but it was all he could give her now. At least until he made sure she was safe.

“Only if you come with me.” Xandria slipped from Bucky's arms and his heart twisted until her fingers caught his. She tugged him toward their bedroom. “I don't feel like being alone right now.”

Her words lodged in his chest and Bucky hated himself even more for what he was going to do to her. It would be better in the long run. He was sure of it. But she wouldn't see it that way, not right away. Maybe not ever. All Bucky could do was show her what she meant to him while he was still here. He would show her and hope that she understood when she woke up alone in the morning.

"After all of that, I need my Bucky." Xandria smiled up at him and tugged again on his hand.

"All yours, babydoll." Bucky meant it. He was hers and leaving didn't change that. But he couldn't quite look her in the eye when she went up on her toes for a kiss.

He let her lead him to the shower. He pulled her borrowed shirt over her head before she could say another word, his mouth slanting over hers the moment her head cleared the garment. Surprise flitted across their bond and Bucky chased the sensation. He would miss this too. Their closeness. The knowledge that she truly saw him and loved him all the same.

Xandria tried to speak when Bucky released her to pull his ruined shirt over his head. But Bucky reclaimed her lips before she got out more than a few soft sounds.

 _Bucky?_ Concern rode over her words.

_It's alright, babygirl._

_Are you okay?_

_I just...I need you, Xandria. Need to know you're okay_.

Xandria broke from the kiss and turned aside to dodge him when Bucky leaned in again. She turned back and scoured his face as her mind searched their bond for whatever it was that made her uneasy.

“Please, doll,” Bucky spoke aloud. He didn't trust their mental connection to keep his secret until she was safe. “Please.”

Xandria hesitated a moment, then nodded. Bucky's hands found her jeans as his mouth slanted across hers once more. He tore her clothes from her body and shifted so she could do the same for him. His hands palmed her ass as he lifted her up and she settled her legs around his waist. It felt natural and right. And Bucky knew he had to walk away.

“Shower, on. Setting four.” Bucky growled the words between kisses. Water rained down as he carried Xandria into the shower. It was too cold to cause steam and that was exactly how he wanted it.

“Bucky...” Xandria whined when the cold water hit her skin but it wasn't from the cold. Bucky knew that whine.

“Patience, babydoll. I want to do this right.”

 _You always do_. Xandria's voice wove into his thoughts and Bucky groaned.

Every reply on Bucky's lips was a lie. He wanted to promise that he'd never leave her. Or that he would always take care of her. But those lies were a step too far. That wasn't the memory he wanted to leave her with. So he loved her with everything he could give. From the shower to their bed and for hours after, until Xandria fell asleep curled into his chest, loved to exhaustion. Her happiness glowed across their bond, woven through with her love for him even in her sleep. Bucky looked down at her, so fragile in his arms.

“I love you, Xandria.”

He pressed his lips to her brow as if he could press the words into her memory. She whimpered in her sleep, fingers curled against his chest. And it nearly broke him. But he pressed his hand to the place where the bullet had nearly taken her away from him. It was a reminder of why he had to do this. That staying would only be selfish, in the end.

Then he slipped from the bed and crept through their room. Steve had left a rucksack in the back of the closet, as promised. It was half-packed and Bucky silently filled it with the rest of his things. He did his best not to look at Xandria until he had packed nearly everything. His hands hesitated on the framed photo that sat on his bedside table. In it, Xandria's smile was luminous. Bucky's was only marginally softer as he faced Xandria instead of the camera.

Jean had taken it on their first trip up to Xavier's school. She'd told him that he was part of their family and the photo was proof. Now Bucky wasn't sure he deserved to take it with him. Not when Xandria would wake up alone. But he couldn't bear to leave it behind. It was all he would have of her once he walked out the door. So he pulled a sweater from his rucksack and carefully wrapped it around the frame before slipping it back into his bag.

He paused at the door and looked back. Xandria didn't even take up a third of the oversized bed they shared. Her curves were obscured by the blankets he'd covered her in when he rose, but Bucky's eyes traced them from memory. The auburn of her hair gleamed faintly in the artificial moonlight that came through the windows on either side of their bed. He ached to forget the whole plan and crawl back in bed with her.

“Ready to go?”

Bucky turned. Steve and Sam stood just inside the apartment, identical rucksacks on their shoulders. They were reminders of why Bucky had to do this to Xandria.  **For**  Xandria.

“Yeah.” Bucky took one last look at Xandria. His mind nuzzled against hers before he forced himself to let go. He felt her reaching for him and backed away from the bedroom.

“This is a stupid idea. I just want to make that clear,” Sam grumbled when they made it to the hall.

“Then why are you coming with us?”

“Because I'm next on Ross' short list when you two turn up missing. Things are changing around here and I'd rather stick with my team than watch Ross twist it.”

Bucky had no response for that. He'd lost his connection to Xandria when they left the apartment, though he could still feel her against his mind in that way he struggled to explain. Part of him was sure it would fade with distance. But as the three men piled into a truck and sped away from the base, Bucky didn't think he wanted it to.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	11. Control

Xandria shivered. A faint frown appeared on her lips as she curled in on herself. One hand quested out across the bed in search of Bucky. She found nothing but empty sheets. Warning rang at the back of her mind but even in her sleep, she pushed it away. Bucky would be here, just not in bed. Xandria's mind swept out through the apartment and bounced back when it met the shielding embedded in the walls.

Her frown deepened and she sent it out again. Then again. And again. She slowly opened her eyes.

“Buck?”

Xandria waited but there was no reply. She sat up and winced as pain pounded to life at the back of her skull. Her legs shook when her feet hit the floor and she managed a small smile as she thought about how tight Bucky had held her when they finally made it to bed. But the smile vanished as fresh pain welled at the base of her neck.

“Bucky?”

Again she waited and again there was no reply. Fear chased away the chill that had woken her. She ignored the way her legs shook and slowly made her way to the bathroom. She was sure she'd find Bucky on the floor or some other awful thing. But the bathroom was empty except for the clothes they had scattered across the room.

Pain exploded behind her eyes. Xandria choked off a sharp cry and pressed her hand against the forehead.

“Bucky? Something...somethin's wrong.”

Xandria blinked but stars still danced in front of her eyes. She pushed off from the door and staggered toward the living room. Another burst of agony nearly sent her to her knees. Crimson rippled under her skin as her mutation answered her fear and pain with power.

“Bucky...I need...I need you.”

Panic joined the pain as Xandria finally staggered into the living room. It was empty. She could see the kitchen from and the second bathroom from their bedroom door. Both empty.

“F-Friday... Friday!”

Xandria gasped as pain set fire to her mind. She lurched toward the door and her legs gave out. She crumpled to the floor, hands on her head as the fire spread down her spine.

“I've called for assistance, Miss Wesson.” Friday's voice barely made it through the next riptide of agony.

“Need...Bucky. My c-control is... I'm not...”

Xandria choked on something between a sob and a scream. She couldn't breathe, couldn't think. Nightmares danced in front of her eyes. Hydra agents, dead soldiers. Every nightmare she'd ever drawn from Bucky's brain crowded into their living room. Pain and panic and fear filled her mind, her lungs. She couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. She needed Bucky. And he wasn't there.

Her body jerked as she flared crimson from head to toe. She finally screamed an inferno of agony and terror erupted from her throat but she didn't hear it. There was no sight, no sound. No Bucky. Every guard and shield she had crumbled under the weight of the despair and the pain. Every horror she'd taken from others during their treatments. Everything she carried from her own past. It swamped her, drowned her. And her mutation answered in a torrent of brilliant force that reduced their furniture to ruins.

Walls cracked. Plaster fell in chunks to reveal the protective alloy beneath. Every door in the apartment blew off its hinges until only the reinforced front door remained. Xandria lay among the shattered furniture and shards of glass, buried in all the pain she'd ever touched.

 

* * *

 

Bucky jerked awake as the truck rounded another curve in the road. Sam jumped in the shotgun seat as Bucky shot upright behind him and twisted to look back toward the base.

“What's wrong?”

“She – I – just... just a nightmare.” Bucky forced himself to take a deep breath. His head ached faintly, something it hadn't done since he'd started on his recovery. But as soon as he'd noticed the pain, it was gone. And the barest trace of Xandria's presence lingered in its place.

“She'll be fine, Buck.” Steve glanced at Bucky in the rear-view mirror. “We'll reach out to Natasha in a week or so if Xan hasn't tracked you down by then.”

“Or you don't go back on your own.” Sam and Steve shared a knowing look.

“I'm not goin' back.”

“We'll see how long that lasts.” Sam shook his head, settled back into his seat and closed his eyes.

“If I go back, she'll end up dead in a firefight. That life's not for her.”

“So you've said. I've heard a lot of bullshit in my time, Barnes. I know what it sounds like.”

Bucky glared at Sam but the other man ignored him. Bucky had no response. He hated himself for leaving Xandria without warning but she would have followed if he'd told her. And then she'd be in danger all over again. No, this was the only way.

But the fear and the doubt wouldn't leave him alone. He looked for traces of her in his mind and nuzzled against them as he found them. They chased off the bitter taste his nightmare had left in his thoughts. She'd be furious, but she'd be fine. She was strong.

 

* * *

 

“What the hell is going on?” Natasha met Tony outside the door to Xandria's apartment. Pietro and Wanda appeared a moment later, woken by Friday when she failed to find Bucky anywhere on base.

“Bucky's gone AWOL. Rogers and Wilson went with him.” Tony's jaw tensed and released as he tapped at the display screen next to the door. He swore when the apartment's cameras refused to come online.

“Are we supposed to search the apartment or something? Barnes wouldn't have left -”

“We have to get  _in_  before we can search it. Xandria's completely lost control.”

“Wait, Barnes  _left her behind_?” Natasha tensed from head to toe.

Tony glanced over though he never stopped working at the screen.

“Apparently. Rogers left a message saying they'd be in touch but that Bucky thought this was the only way to keep Xandria safe.”

“Son of a bitch.” Natasha closed her eyes and shook her head. She took two deep breaths and looked back at Tony. “James has done this before. The whole 'I'm a magnet for trouble, it'll get people around me killed' vanishing act. I would have warned her but I thought – I mean they ... I never thought he'd leave her behind.”

Wanda moved to the door and pressed her hand against the heavy wood. She shook her head after a moment, anger in her eyes.

“I can't feel anything, not when she's in there. I have to go in.”

“I'd advise against it, Miss Maximoff. Miss Wesson has lost complete control. Structural integrity is down 15% and there is no -”

“I'll be fine, Friday. I can shield myself against the worst of it.”

“I don't understand  _why_.” Pietro shook his head when the other three frowned at him. “Why would she lose control like this? It's not like her.”

“I'd bet it has something to do with Barnes' recovery.” Wanda's mouth set in a grim line. “She was always so tired after the therapy really got underway and their connection was... it seemed off. Stronger than it should have been.”

Tony and Natasha shared another frown.

“Should we give Professor Xavier a call?” Tony turned back to Wanda, deferring to her in matters of mutant relations. Wanda nodded.

“He might already be on his way. His powers are a bit uncanny like that. But it's best to call him just to be sure. I don't think she lost control on purpose. And that means she won't be able to regain control on her own.”

Natasha nodded and marched back down the corridor, her phone already in her hands. Wanda reached for the door and Tony stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

“You need to put her under. I'll get a quarantine room set up, but we can't move her when she's this destructive.”

Wanda nodded.

“You two should get behind the door. It'll shield you until I'm inside.”

Tony gave the display panel one more frustrated tap before he backed away and joined Pietro behind the door. The twins shared a worried glance and then Tony keyed the door open.

Crimson tongues of fire-like force licked out around the door. Wanda slid inside, her hands out as her own mutation created a protective bubble around her.

“Xandria?” She called for her friend but no answer came.

The lights were off but would have been dark even if they'd been on, the fixtures smashed into shards that crunched under Wanda's shoes. She called up a small ball of power in one hand and held it out like a light. It cast the room in a ruby glow. Coupled with the crimson waves of Xandria's powers, it gave Wanda just enough light to find Xandria's crumpled form on the living room floor.

Wanda dropped to her knees beside her friend, hands shaking. Xandria's eyes were wide and staring, pupils blown so nothing of her natural hazel remained. Just blood-shot irises and the black void of her pupils. She whined under her breath, her throat too damaged for real screams.

“Oh, Xandria...” Tears pricked at Wanda's eyes and she blinked them back. Xandria didn't respond to her voice. Terror held her mind hostage.

Wanda could feel it. The fear tried to invade her too the moment she connected her mind to Xandria's. Wanda's wards beat back the terror but her stomach turned over as she found her way too easily into Xandria's mind. All of it – every ward, every protection, everything that kept telepaths anchored – was gone. Fragments and ruins were all that remained. Crumbled and torn as if they'd been ripped away.

 _It's going to be okay. I'm here, we're here. It'll all be okay_. Tears slipped past Wanda's lashes as she wrapped her mind around the broken mess Xandria's had become.  _Xavier is on his way. He'll help you put it all back. You'll be better soon._

Wanda closed her eyes and ignored the tears that now freely fell down her cheeks. She gingerly wrapped her control around Xandria's mind. Then she found the core of her friend's power and pushed it back. Over and over she folded it in on itself until she could wrap another layer of her control around it to hold it in place.

 _Sleep. It'll all be better when you wake up_. Wanda touched two fingers to Xandria's head and willed her friend to obey. It shouldn't have worked, Xandria's wards should have stopped her. But there were no defenses left and Xandria's eyes rolled back as she went limp, the crimson finally fading from her skin.

Pietro appeared a moment later. He rested a gentle hand on his sister's shoulder and crouched at her side, a flashlight in one hand.

“Xavier is on his way. He's got Doctor Grey with him. They'll fix this.”

Wanda only shook her head. She'd told Xandria the same thing. But here among the destruction, her own mind wrapped around the ruins of Xandria's, she just didn't know if she believed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	12. Family Ties

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying out a new spacing format. If you feel so inclined, please let me know if you prefer it this way or the way I usually format things!

Tony and Pietro stood on the tarmac and watched as the two jets came in to land. One sleek and the other bloated by comparison. What remained of the team waited inside the base. Wanda refused to leave Xandria's side in the quarantine room and Vision went where she did. Natasha was busy trying to find Bucky, Sam, and Steve. And Rhodey was with Bruce in whatever lab was furthest away from Secretary Ross.

 

The Secretary disembarked nearly at a run, eager to catch Professor Xavier and Doctor Grey before they got too far ahead of him. For his part, the professor had little interest in talking with the Secretary of State.

 

“I won't have answers for you until I see to Xandria myself, Secretary Ross.”

 

“Doctor Grey, maybe you could spare a moment?” Ross' voice left little room for argument. The doctor only smiled.

 

“Think of us as trauma surgeons. We need to get in and see what's going on before we can tell you anything.”

 

Pietro led them into the base and Ross standing on the tarmac.

 

“I don't like this, Mr. Stark.”

 

“Well, they are her family. _And_ the people most likely to put our little Humpty Xumpty back together again. Can't _imagine_ why they'd be in a rush to go see her.” Tony shrugged and followed Pietro's path inside. Ross had little choice but to follow behind and wait wherever Tony put him.

 

* * *

 

Wanda sat at Xandria's bedside, one hand wrapped around her friend's wrist. Her eyes snapped open when Pietro's mind brushed hers ahead of the group's arrival. She glanced at Xandria and gave her wrist a gentle squeeze.

 

_They're here. Everything will be alright soon. Just hang on a little bit longer._

 

A rush of wind stirred Wanda's hair before Pietro's hand came down on her shoulder.

 

“Miss Maximoff, I cannot thank you enough.” Professor Xavier rolled to a stop in front of Wanda and took her free hand in his. His brow furrowed when he felt her exhaustion. “Is she really so far gone that you've given this much?”

 

“I...I don't know.” Wanda stuttered around the sudden lump in her throat. Her shoulders sagged as Professor Grey took Xandria's other hand and some of the burden shifted to the older woman.

 

“Oh, Charles... Charles, this is bad.” Jean's eyes lost their focus for a moment as she delved into the ruins of Xandria's mind. Her free hand came up and absently stroked the hair back from Xandria's forehead.

 

“Show me.”

 

Xavier gently patted Wanda's hand as Jean reached for his wrist.

 

“You can let go now, Miss Maximoff. You've carried her this far, you can rest.”

 

“I want to see what you do. I can't... if it happens again...” Wanda shook her head and let a wave of explanation roll out from her mind. The professors glanced at each other before Charles nodded.

 

“We'll teach you as much as can. But we may not be able to fix her here. She might have to come home with us.”

 

“Then I'll go too. I won't abandon her, not when Bucky already has.”

 

They all knew it was unkind. And they knew it wasn't entirely accurate. But that did little to wipe away the anger they felt. Professor Xavier let them sit with their anger for a moment, then turned to Xandria.

 

“Should we join together before we enter her mind?”

 

“There's no need.” Jean's gaze focused. She turned a worried frown toward Professor Xavier. “She has no wards, Charles. None.”

 

“Oh, dear...we need to begin. Now.”

 

Wanda glanced from one professor to the other and closed her eyes when they did the same. Xandria whined softly as Wanda loosened the control she had wrapped around Xandria's mind and the three telepaths slipped inside.

 

* * *

 

All three telepaths materialized as thought-forms in the desolate waste Xandria's mind had become.

 

“Where is she? She's had a thought-form since she was five.” Jean spun slowly on her heel and scanned the blackness for some sign of Xandria.

 

A sense of Professor Xavier washed over the women as he cast his senses further than the others could.

 

“I...I don't feel her. I feel fear and pain but not Xandria.”

 

“It's not all hers.” Wanda blushed when the other telepaths looked at her. She motioned to the swirling mists further into Xandria's mind. “I tried to find her before you got here. A lot of what I found doesn't belong to Xandria.”

 

“Are you saying someone did this to her?”

 

“Not intentionally, no.” Wanda shook her head to stave off the anger brewing in Jean's eyes. “I can't be sure but I think... I think this is because of Bucky.”

 

“Mr. Barnes has neither the skill nor the desire to do something like this.” Xavier shook his head.

 

“He didn't mean to. I don't think he even knows what's happened. We – the team, that is – we haven't been able to reach any of them.”

 

“What do you think happened?” Jean prompted.

 

“Bucky's recovery was fast. Faster than anyone expected. He still had bad days, but they were further apart and they were getting easier. But their connection – the bond he and Xandria shared – it was too strong. Every time something went wrong in Bucky's mind, it was like Xandria was already there to fix it before even Bucky knew something was wrong.”

 

“How do you know this?”

 

“I...I could feel her. Her presence was always part of his, even if she was on the other side of the base. Bucky would get an odd look in his eye or his mind would read wrong and then it would just... get better.”

 

“You don't think... is a permanent link even possible?” Jean turned to Xavier.

 

“I'm not sure.”

 

The professor moved further into Xandria's mind.

 

“She has to be here somewhere. The negative emotions must be masking her. We can build her some temporary wards until she can replace them with her own. After that, we can free her.”

 

“We need to lock up her secondary mutation first. Otherwise, she could destroy the entire quarantine unit.”

 

Wanda spun her fingers through the air and a brilliant orb appeared at her fingertips. The deep pink crimson of Xandria's energy pulsed and writhed against the brighter red bonds of Wanda's magic.

 

“We read the damage report on the flight over. How long was she alone in the apartment?”

 

“Rogers did something to Friday's sensors so we aren't quite sure when the three of them left. But Xandria was awake for maybe two minutes before she lost control.” Wanda swallowed, the destruction still too fresh in her mind.

 

Jean held out her hands and Wanda flicked the ball of energy into her waiting palms. The professor looked at it for a moment, then slowly uncoiled the layers of Wanda's control. Xandria's energy seemed to calm as Wanda's control weakened.

 

“The negative energy wasn't hiding her from our senses,” Jean murmured. “She was hiding herself.”

 

Jean set the ball of energy on what passed for ground. Tendrils spread out like roots as the ball slowly grew in size. Wanda's eyes widened. Xandria's form slowly materialized within the orb. At least, she thought it was Xandria. The thought-form's skin was a roiling mass of wounds and colors. It had no hair, no clothes, and no definition to its limbs. It was little more than the outline of a person curled into a ball on the ground. Wanda moved toward the form but Charles held out a hand to stop her.

 

“May I, Miss Maximoff? You're her friend – I daresay her family. But I saw her through her first wards. I may have more luck.”

 

Wanda's jaw tensed but she nodded. The professor had a point. He was the closest thing Xandria had to a father. So Wanda stood back as the professor rolled forward and put a hand on the shell of energy that surrounded the form.

 

 _Alexandria?_ His voice rang through the chambers of Xandria's mind. The form in the bubble curled in tighter on itself. _You need to come out of there. Hiding inside this chaos will do you no good_.

 

All three of them felt a hint of pressure as Xandria tried to push them from her mind. Wanda swallowed back tears. It wasn't anything like the force Xandria normally had. It felt like little more than a light breeze against her hand.

 

“I'm going to raise a ward and see if that helps bring her out of her shell.” Jean settled down on the ground and closed her eyes. Wanda felt helpless as she stood between the two professors, her hands dangling at her sides.

 

 _I know you can feel Jean and Wanda. We're here to help you. You're not alone_.

 

Anger swirled around them then burned out as fast as it had come on.

 

 _No... Bu..._ Fragments of Xandria's voice whispered through the silence.

 

“No bu?” Jean frowned as she tried to piece together a meaning. Wanda didn't hesitate.

 

“Not Bucky. She's saying she wants Bucky.”

 

 _We will find him in time. Right now we need to get your wards back in place_.

 

Chill confusion wrapped around each of them in turn as Xandria searched for answers. Wanda's hands flew to her mouth as realization dawned.

 

“How can she not know?” Wanda looked from one professor to the other. “How can she not know how exposed she is?”

 

“Her mind is lost in the chaos of her concussive mutation. She must have retreated on instinct when Barnes took her wards with him.”

 

“Is that really what happened?” Wanda turned to face Jean. The older woman frowned as she nodded.

 

“I can still find traces of Barnes' mind intertwined with Xandria's. We'll have to ask her to be sure, but I don't think she did this on purpose.”

 

“I can find out once you've placed new wards and we draw her out of this chaos,” Professor Xavier mumbled. Both women glanced at him but he had his eyes closed, his hand still pressed against the energy shell Xandria hid beneath.

 

_Alexandria, we can't help you when you hide from us. You know I can't drag you out. But if you stay in there, you will be all alone._

 

The energy shell shivered. Cracks spiderwebbed across the surface. Xandria slowly uncurled, though the chaos of her form didn't slow.

 

_Let us help you, Alexandria. Give me your hand._

 

Professor Xavier leaned on the bubble as Xandria slowly sat up. Her head swiveled from side to side as she searched for something. She finally turned toward Professor Xavier's hand. Confusion rippled across them once more, fear close on its tail.

 

 _There is nothing to fear. We only want to help_. Professor Xavier opened his eyes and smiled down at Xandria's thought form. Her hand flexed. Then she slowly reached up and pressed her palm to the professor's.

 

The shell of energy shivered again. A heartbeat passed. And then it splintered into nothing. Wanda expected a rush of wind or the crash of an explosion. She wasn't ready for the soft tinkling sound of falling glass. Or the wave of sadness and exhaustion that flooded her senses.

 

“Oh, Xandria.” Wanda rushed forward. Xandria's thought-form held out its free hand. Wanda wrapped it in both of hers as she knelt beside her friend.

 

A faint sense of pressure was their only warning before Jean's wards popped into place. Xandria's mind slowly stilled, the chaos held at bay by Jean's wards and Xandria's connection to both Wanda and Xavier.

 

_Bu....cky..._

 

“We'll find him. As soon as we can safely wake you up, we'll set about finding him.”

 

 _Find?_ Panic filled the space around them before Charles swamped it with his own sense of calm.

 

“He is fine. He just isn't available at the moment. That's all I meant.”

 

Wanda frowned. Not just at the professor's lie but at the fact that Xandria couldn't see it for the falsehood it was. Here, in her mind, Xandria should have been able to see through the lie in a heartbeat. But her thought-form only nodded and slowly laid its head on Professor Xavier's knee. The professor stroked his hand over where Xandria's hair should have been. Wanda moved closer and slid her arm around the form's shoulders.

 

The longer Xandria's thought-form remained between the two of them, the clearer the projection became.

 

“Miss Maximoff, would you be so kind as to focus on the way Xandria was prior to this incident? Your contact should allow her to access your memories and impressions. It will help her come back to herself.”

 

Wanda nodded up at the professor and laid her cheek on the side of Xandria's head. She drew on her memories of Xandria. From their first meeting nearly a year ago to the way Xandria and Bucky had smiled at each other on the jet just before the team touched down in Lagos. Each memory pulled her friend a little closer to the surface. Jean joined them a moment later, her hand on Xandria's shoulder as she too drew up memories to anchor Xandria back inside herself.

 

 _Thank you_. Xandria's voice was still faint but it was the first complete thought she'd yet offered.

 

“This is only the beginning, sweetheart. The damage, it's... it's severe.”

 

Xandria raised her head from Xavier's knee and frowned. Her thought-form was closer to normal though she still didn't feel real under Wanda's hands.

  
“Damage?” Her voice came out as a croak but it was something. Wanda tightened her arm around Xandria's shoulders and offered a small smile.

 

“You suffered a mental break, I'm afraid. We still don't know the exact nature, but we're going to find out. We wanted to find you, first. You gave us quite a scare.”

 

“I'm sorry.” Xandria rested her head on his knee once more. The professor patted her head.

 

“I don't think it's quite something to apologize for. More something to be avoided in the future.”

 

“But to do that,” Jean cut in. “We need to find out why it happened this time. Do you remember anything?”

 

Xandria frowned, brows drawn. They felt her mind working before she shook her head.

 

“I... woke up... cold.” She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes as her mind struggled to piece together her memories. It was the same process she'd once helped Bucky with, though on a blessedly smaller scale. “I looked for...Bucky. And then my head...”

 

Phantom pain brushed against them. Xavier chased it away and gently shushed Xandria.

 

“That's enough for now. I imagine the rest can be pieced together from security camera footage. In the meantime, perhaps we should go explore what is left of your wards.”

 

“Left of... what happened?” Xandria sat up as the Professor slowly pulled away. Wanda and Jean slowly helped her stand on legs that shook with the effort.

 

“That's what we're going to find out, sweetheart.” Jean looped her arm through Xandria's.

 

She and Xavier took the lead. Wanda caught up and laced her fingers with Xandria's. She nearly burst into tears when she felt Xandria touch lightly on the bridge that had once connected their minds. Wanda opened it and gathered Xandria inside, wrapping her senses around the ghost of her friend's presence.

 

_He's gone, isn't he?_

 

Wanda hesitated and that alone gave Xandria the answer she needed.

 

_Did he choose to go? Or were we... was I..._

 

 _We weren't attacked. He... he did it to protect you, I think_.

 

Pain flared to life all around them. Xavier and Jean ignored it, keenly aware that the younger women were communicating over a private bridge. Xandria kept walking, even as her head bowed and the pain around them grew heavier.

 

_It'll be okay, Xandria. I promise._

 

 _No_.

 

Xandria's voice was sharp, though her next words came out so softly that Wanda nearly missed them.

 

 _No more promises. Never again_.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	13. Way Back When

The group stopped short of the wards that Jean had erected.

 

“Where...where are mine?”

 

Xandria pulled free of both Jean and Wanda. She took a few steps forward, then stopped and crouched down. Her hands explored the place where Jean's wards fused into the shattered remnants of her own. Jean and Xavier glanced at each other.

 

“That's what we need to find out.”

 

Xavier rolled forward and laid his hand on Xandria's shoulder. She tensed under his touch, her agitation palpable in the air.

 

“Why can I feel him?” Xandria rested her hand against a remnant of her wards and looked up at Xavier. “Why is he still here if he left?”

 

“We were hoping you could tell us,” Xavier murmured. For the first time, Wanda didn't see him as a professor or one of the world's foremost mutants. She saw him as a person, as a father. Xandria's pain was mirrored in Xavier's eyes.

 

“How should I know?” Bitterness spilled into Xandria's voice and tainted the air around them. “I did what you taught me to do. I fixed him.”

 

“But _how_ did you fix him? Sweetheart, you're saturated in his fear. I can feel his memories twisting through yours without even trying.” Jean crouched down beside Xandria.

 

Xandria looked back at the broken wards and frowned.

 

“We walked his memories,” she murmured, brows drawn in thought. “I taught him how to connect memory chains and how to detect false memories or fragments.”

 

“None of that would have fused your minds,” Xavier prompted softly. Xandria glanced up at him then looked back at the wards.

 

“I... I built a bridge, but it was nothing special.”

 

Wanda knelt down beside her friend and gently took her hand.

 

“What about the trigger? Or when the two of you went into the wall?”

 

“Went into the wall?” Xavier frowned faintly. Xandria only shook her head.

 

“Hydra's mindwipes put up these walls in Bucky's mind. They kept him from remembering but let his conditioning through. They were crude but effective. He...he brought one down.”

 

“I remember that from his file,” Jean cut in. “But what do you mean you went _into_ the wall?”

 

Xandria slowly sat back and drew her knees up to her chest.

 

“We were trying to clean up the debris from the wall. Wanda helped me reach him without being in the same room.” She laid her cheek on her knees. “We were almost done and then Bucky reached for this really bad section.”

 

Sadness nearly drowned them all as Xandria closed her eyes and buried her face against her knees. Wanda pulled Xandria against her chest as her friend's shoulders began to shake. Xandria tried to speak but a soft sob was all she could manage. Wanda took over.

 

“It contained the trigger that made Bucky go after Steve. He fell into it and Xandria went in after him.”

 

“How did you get out?” Jean smoothed her hands over Xandria's hair until the younger woman calmed enough to go on.

 

“Wanda fed me warm memories, happy memories. I blended them with my own and used them to support him. And then we... he kissed me. And it... it seemed to shake off the construct's hold on him.”

 

“All of this sounds normal so far. Although it is unusual to channel as much into him as you seemed to have done.”

 

Xandria raised her head and looked up at Professor Xavier.

 

“It was the only way. He was so lost for so long. And then they came for us in Siberia and-” Xandria cut off as her eyes slowly widened.

 

Jean brushed her fingers through Xandria's hair in silent encouragement.

 

“Bucky's mind fractured on the tower, in Siberia. I tried to connect with him but he couldn't open to. He wanted to but he couldn't. So I just... just forged one. But then Hydra was there and he was on his feet and my mutation broke free and I...I forgot all about it.”

 

Wanda's brow furrowed before her eyes widened. Her surprise attracted the attention of the other three and she blushed when she looked up to find them all staring at her.

 

“I was the one who put him back together after Siberia. A little, anyway. I don't have Xandria's skill.” Wanda squeezed Xandria's hand and Xandria managed a faint lopsided smile for her friend. “I could feel Xandria when I went into Bucky's mind. I didn't think anything of it back then. They'd worked together so much that I thought it was just her memories.”

 

Xavier sat back in his chair and pressed his lips to the tops of his knuckles.

 

“I had wondered about his recovery on the tower. But there never seemed to be a reason to pry. Perhaps I should have.”

 

The color drained from Xandria's face and the air around them seemed to grow cold.

 

“What did I do?” Xandria's voice thinned with fear. “Is that why he left? Because I did something? I didn't mean to!”

 

A thread of panic wove through her words until Jean pulled Xandria in against her chest. Wanda's own fear rose. She had never seen Xandria like this. Not cool, collected Xandria. Even on the tower in Siberia, she had been in control right up until her mutation broke free. Now her fear roiled around them, shot through with panic and the heartbreak she could not hide.

 

“No, sweetheart. That's not...” Jean trailed off and rested her brow against Xandria's hair. “If you didn't know you'd forged a permanent link, there is no way Bucky knew.”

 

“He wanted to protect you. He did it wrong, but that's... that's what Steve's note said.”

 

“Steve's... why did...?” Xandria looked up at Wanda through a curtain of her hair. Wanda gently tucked it back out of the way.

 

“Steve and Sam went with him. We don't know why, but Natasha is working right now to try and find them.”

 

Xandria shook her head and buried her face against her knees again.

 

“She won't. If they don't want to be found, they won't be.”

 

“Natasha can -”

 

“No, she can't.” Xandria shook her head and slowly pulled free from both Jean and Wanda. “I...I'm okay. For now, anyway. I want some time alone to...to clean this up.”

 

“You can't do it alone, Alexandria.” Professor Xavier reached for her but Xandria drew back and shook her head.

 

“I know. I just... I need time alone. To think and...and process.”

 

She stood up and stepped out of the ring her family made around her. Her senses pushed at them and urged them back to their own minds. They hesitated and she pushed again. It was more forceful this time but still had none of the strength it should have. Xavier and Jean slowly retreated until only Wanda remained.

 

“You don't have to be alone with this,” she murmured. Xandria just shook her head before her thought-form vanished entirely.

 

_Please, Wanda. Just...just go._

 

The push came again. This time Wanda let it force her from Xandria's mind. She opened her eyes and found Jean and Xavier deep in conversation across the room.

 

“What happened?” Pietro murmured the words beside her ear but Wanda shook her head.

 

“I'll tell you later.”

 

She looked down at Xandria. Her friend's eyes were still closed and she hadn't moved since the professors had arrived. But two damp tracks gave away the tears that had fallen. Wanda gently brushed her thumb over one and then the other.

 

“She wants to be alone.” The words hurt Wanda's mouth but she forced them out.

 

“We shouldn't leave -”

 

“Piet, please.” Wanda slowly stood from her chair. “It's what she wants. Right now she needs someone to listen.”

 

She looked up at her brother, then moved toward the door. The professors led the way out. Pietro went after and Wanda brought up the rear.

 

 _We love you._ She left the thought with Xandria. _We're here when you're ready._

 

She paused at the door and looked back. Xandria didn't answer in mind or voice. But fresh tears darkened her lashes before Wanda stepped out and closed the door.

 

“What do we do now?”

 

The professors were gone but Pietro waited in the hall. His twitching fingers betrayed his agitation.

 

“We follow her lead. We support her.”

 

“What about Barnes?”

 

Wanda could only shake her head. Natasha would find them. She had to.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	14. Waiting is the Hardest Part

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the pause in updates! I hit a snag when writing a chapter not too far ahead of this one and needed to fix it before I could keep updating. It should be smoother sailing from here on out!

Wanda sat beside Jean in one of the compound's conference rooms. The team rarely used places like this. They preferred the commons that connected their apartments. But the commons was for family. And Secretary Ross did not count as family.

 

“Twenty-four hours ago Miss Wesson was recovering from a battle wound. Sergeant Barnes was at this table and Captain Rogers assured me that Lagos was a fluke.” Ross stared at each remaining team member in turn. His eyes did not, Wanda notice, pause on either Jean or Xavier.

 

“Now Miss Wesson is – how did Doctor Cho put it?”

 

“Borderline comatose. Suffering severe tissue damage to the interior of her throat. Bearing several lacerations, both major and minor, from broken glass and falling debris.” Tony shrugged when most of those assembled turned to look at him. “I might have looked over the report once or twice.”

 

“And Barnes is AWOL. Not only is _he_ gone, but it seems he took Rogers and Wilson with him.” Ross turned on Natasha. “Are you absolutely certain his actions weren't hostile?”

 

Natasha was impossible to read as she nodded and tapped at the tablet in her hands. The screen behind Ross lit up with the message Steve had left for them.

 

“Rogers didn't use any distress codes, his language is controlled, and he promises to be in touch.” She tapped on her tablet a few more times. The screen flicked over to the feed from a security camera. “Rogers is driving the truck, Wilson is in the shotgun seat. Barnes is in the back.”

 

Natasha's mind brushed Wanda's. Their eyes met and Natasha's eyes flicked to the screen. Her mind guided Wanda to Bucky. Stark's security cameras were in a league of their own. Which meant that Bucky's face was crystal clear. Even with only a few seconds of footage, Barnes' pain was palpable. It didn't help Xandria. But it eased some of Wanda's doubt. She passed the knowledge onto Pietro and his foot stopped tapping for the first time since they'd gone to retrieve Xandria. His anger ran too deep to be cooled so quickly. At least it was a start.

 

“So they abandoned the team for no reason?”

 

Ross leaned in and braced his hands on the head of the table. Tony tensed, then leaned back in his chair. Wanda raised her shields as tension flooded the room. Everything felt off-balance. Xandria wasn't there to draw away the tension. Steve wasn't there to answer questions. Sam wasn't there as a voice of reason. It all just felt wrong.

 

“If I may, Secretary Ross?”

 

Professor Xavier motioned to the screen behind Ross' head.

 

“Sergeant Barnes left because he felt it was an act for the greater good. Captain Rogers and Agent Wilson went with him because they did not want him out in the world alone.”

 

“With all due respect, Professor, how do you know this?” Ross' voice was a shade gentler when he turned to face Xavier. It did little to mask the distaste on his face.

 

“Largely through the use of common sense.” Xavier offered a Ross a kind smile as Pietro tried to smother a snort of laughter. “Miss Maximoff was quite certain that Sergeant Barnes left to reduce the Hydra threat against Alexandria. It is my understanding that this information came from Agent Romanov.”

 

All eyes turned to Natasha. She nodded, though her eyes rested uneasily on Xavier. Wanda shifted in her seat, acutely aware of Natasha's general distrust of telepaths.

 

“Barnes has done this sort of thing before.”

 

“Is this personal knowledge or knowledge from his file, Agent Romanov?”

 

Natasha leveled a cold stare at Ross. Their gazes held. And then Ross shifted his weight from one foot to the other and the barest smile graced Natasha's face.

 

“Both. Barnes is gone but Miracle is here. That means he left to protect her.”

 

“And if he left alone, there is little doubt that both Hydra and the US government would be in hot pursuit.” Xavier jumped back in. “Therefore it makes sense that both Captain Rogers and Agent Wilson went with him to forestall any concern that Mr. Barnes had gone rogue.”

 

Ross looked from Xavier to Natasha and back. His eyes lingered on Jean and the Wanda before he turned to Tony.

 

“Do you have any input on this, Mr. Stark? You are in charge of this team.”

 

“I mostly just pay the bills, if I'm being honest. Rogers was the more hands-on parent.” Tony shrugged. Wanda had to look away. The casual motion was at complete odds with the pain ringing out from his mind.

 

“Mr. Stark.” Ross' voice held a note of warning.

 

Tony sighed and stood up. A few taps on the head of the table brought up a live feed of Xandria's recovery room.

 

“Wesson is in no state for fieldwork. I can't speak to the state of her mutations, but she is physically in no shape for much of anything.”

 

“Can either of _you_ speak to the state of her mutations?” Ross turned to Jean and Xavier. The two of them exchanged glances before Jean leaned forward and folded her hands on the table.

 

“Telepaths can do what we do only because we learn to ward ourselves. If we don't, we are overrun with the thoughts of other people. We go insane.” Jean sighed and motioned at Xandria's form. “Alexandria's wards are gone. It is our belief that she – under duress and without her own knowledge – formed a permanent bond with Mr. Barnes. When he left, the nature of their bond allowed him to take her wards with him.”

 

“Allowed him to what?” Tony frowned and crossed his arms over his chest.

 

“He took her wards with him when he left. At some point, he got far enough away that their mental tether snapped. When it did, the nature of their bond sent all of Alexandria's wards to his end of their link. To give a visual reference, it is like a giant ripped a house off its foundations and left little but rubble.”

 

“Can she recover?” Tony slowly sank back down into his chair. Jean nodded, though a frown drew her brows together.

 

“She can, given time. Her recovery will go faster if she is aided by another telepath.”

 

“Are you taking her back to your... school?”

 

A ripple went through the room. Pietro frowned and glanced at Wanda as Tony exchanged startled looks with Rhodey. Natasha froze in her seat until she may as well have been cut from marble. Ross looked around the room and let out a short, dark laugh.

 

“I'm surprised this thought didn't occur to the rest of you. If she is too injured for field work and her work with Barnes is no longer relevant, she has no place in the Avengers.”

 

Pietro's hand clenched around the edge of the table. Wanda reached for her brother's mind and flashed a note of warning. It held him in check, but just barely. Tony's hands flexed as he forced them flat against the tabletop.

 

“With all _due respect_ , Secretary Ross, that is not your call to make.”

 

“Not at the moment, perhaps.”

 

“Meaning?”

 

Ross glanced at Xavier and Jean before he went on.

 

“Lagos did not go unnoticed. Neither did Sokovia, Washington DC or Seoul. There is a movement in the works known as The Sokovia Accords.”

 

“The Sokovia Accords?” Wanda looked around the table but nobody else on the team seemed any less confused.

 

“It's a registry.” Horror slowly filled Jean's voice. Revulsion swept through the room.

 

“It's not that kind of registry, Doctor Grey. It is an initiative – much like the Avengers Initiative – to put power in the hands of the people.”

 

“By power, you mean the names and location of anyone seen as other than human.”

 

“This meeting is not about the Accords, Professor Xavier.” Ross motioned to Xandria's form still hovering on the wall behind his head. “It is only relevant in that it would put control of the Avengers in the hands of the UN and the World Security Council.”

 

The implication was clear. Pietro opened his mouth, looked at his sister, then vanished from the room. Tony's hands spasmed as he fought to keep them flat against the tabletop. He and Rhodey held a silent conversation in glances and frowns until Tony slowly stood from his chair.

 

“It's been a long day, Secretary Ross. And I'm sure the professors would like to get some sleep before Xandria wakes up.” Tony swept a hand towards the door. Ross hesitated and glanced around the room. Something in the faces he saw sealed Tony's invitation.

 

Ross left the room, Tony tailing close behind. Natasha slid down in her seat once the men were out of sight. Nobody spoke for a long moment, their eyes on the table or Xandria or the walls. Anywhere but the faces of their teammates.

 

“I'm going to go help Tony see the secretary off.” Rhodey rose from his seat. “Professor Xavier, Doctor Grey, it was a pleasure.”

 

“Colonel Rhodes, a pleasure indeed.” Xavier shook Rhodey's offered hand, then sat back in his chair. A moment later Rhodey was gone. Natasha slipped out on his heels and left Wanda alone with Xavier and Jean.

 

The three mutants looked at one another then at Xandria's image.

 

“What do we do now?” Wanda murmured.

 

Xavier slowly rolled back from the table as Jean rose from her seat. Wanda followed as they made their way out of the conference room.

 

“Now,” Jean said as she took Wanda's hand. “We wait.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	15. Living Things

Xandria refused visitors the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that. Nearly a week went by before anyone but the medical staff set foot in her room. Wanda went every day and tried to convince Xandria to let her in – to let anyone in. But, in the end, it was Tony who got his foot in the door.

 

“Knock knock.”

 

Tony poked his head into the white sterility of Xandria's recovery room. She didn't bother opening her eyes though the monitors said she was awake.

 

“I brought these for you. I know you like flowers and, well, living things.”

 

He set down the potted flowers on the only table in the room, then stuffed his hands into his pockets and began a slow lap around the perimeter. Xandria shifted on the bed, her knees tucked into her chest and her hands clenched in the blankets as she curled on her side.

 

“Is it alright? Me being in here, I mean. The good professors said something about wards and mental static. I don't want to overload you. I wanted to come see you, though. Make sure everything is up to par. Top shelf, if you will. But if it's too much I can -”

 

“It's fine.”

 

Tony rocked to a stop. Her voice was a broken rasp of what it used to be. But it was the first time anyone had heard it since Bucky had pulled her out of Lagos.

 

“The room or me being here?” Tony bit back his usual urge to ramble and waited. Xandria's lashes fluttered against her cheeks.

 

“B-both.”

 

She grimaced and swallowed, words foreign to her damaged throat.

 

“We can fix that up, you know. A little tissue regeneration and boom, singing like a songbird again.” Tony wandered over to a chair against one wall and quietly picked it up.

 

“Don't wanna.”

 

“Oh, I get it. Going for the old lounge singer rasp. Gotta say, Xanadu, doesn't really fit your style.”

 

Tony set the chair beside Xandria's bed and eased down onto the seat. Xandria still hadn't moved, save the slight shift of her weight on her hip. Her pale skin was free of the red tendrils that warned of a power surge and Tony leaned toward her. He stopped when her shoulders tensed.

 

“You can't stay locked in here forever, Xandria.” He rested his hand on the edge of the bed. Xandria didn't move. Tony held his breath as he slowly slid his hand closer to hers. “Wanda's got nobody to talk about books with. Pietro is absolutely out of control without that little glare you do. Barton's taken over the track for archery practice. Natasha's dyed her hair blonde. It's total chaos out there!”

 

Tony sucked in a deep breath and held it as he eased his hand over Xandria's. The bed creaked as she tensed with a jerk. But Tony held fast. He slowly covered the knot of her hands with his fingers.

 

“Please, Xandria. Let someone in. Let us help you.”

 

Faint red lines glowed along her cheekbones before they faded from sight. Tony sucked in another breath and held it as Xandria slowly opened her eyes. They were rimmed in red and it had nothing to do with her mutation. The damp spots on her pillow were just additional evidence that Tony didn't need.

 

“Has...has Natasha...” Xandria swallowed, then licked her lips. Tony reached for her water with his free hand and let her drink before she went on. “Has Nat... found... them?”

 

Tony slowly shook his head.

 

“Not yet, kid. She's looking. And Rogers said he would be in touch. Just, ya know, not _when_.”

 

“They're not...coming back.” Xandria grimaced and took another sip of water when Tony offered the straw.

 

“I...I don't know, Xanadu.”

 

“I know. He's... they're gone.”

 

Tony watched her for a moment. Xandria closed her eyes and Tony squeezed her hand, afraid to lose her again.

 

“What about you, huh?” Tony flashed her a soft smile when Xandria opened her eyes to squint at him. “You've got people out there who want to help you. Here and at the school. Wherever you decide to go, you don't have to be alone.”

 

Xandria stared up at him. A frown tugged at her lips and Tony tensed. But no shockwave came. No red streaks marred Xandria's skin.

 

“The...the school?”

 

“Yeah, Xavier's school. Word around the compound is that you've got a ride back to your old stomping grounds if that's what you want.”

 

“I...I don't know. I don't belong...here.”

 

“I don't know about that.” Tony patted Xandria's hand then sat back in his chair, his hand still over hers. “I meant what I said before. It's chaos out there. Utter mayhem. We could still use a Miracle on the team.”

 

Tony's smile faded a little when Xandria's didn't appear. The old teasing still couldn't touch her. He wasn't surprised. But he had hoped.

 

“Just think about it, okay? We just want to help.”

 

Tony patted her hand and rose from his chair. He only made it a half-step before Xandria's hand closed around his trailing fingers.

 

“Please...don't go.” Xan swallowed and squeezed her eyes shut. “Just...just for a minute.”

 

“I can do that.” Tony slowly sank back into his chair. “Just for a minute, though. Any longer and I think Wanda might get jealous.”

 

“Is...she here?”

 

“She's right outside. Do you want to see her?”

 

Slowly, as if it hurt her, Xandria nodded. Tony felt a prickle of remorse for the small lie, but it was necessary. Wanda was in her room but between Friday's notification and Pietro's speed, she would be at the door fast enough that it wouldn't matter. And, just as predicted, Wanda poked her head into the room a few seconds later.

 

“Can I come in?”

 

Xandria's nod was slow and pained. But there was no mistaking the way her shoulders slowly eased at the sound of Wanda's voice. Wanda glanced at Tony as she silently crossed the room. Her brows rose when she saw Xandria's fingers curled around Tony's. It should have overwhelmed Xandria's senses. Either Jean's wards were still holding strong or Xandria had been building her own. And that's what Wanda needed to know.

 

“How are you feeling?” Wanda leaned over Xandria and slowly rested her hand on her friend's shoulder. Xandria tensed but didn't try to shift away from the touch.

 

“Tired,” Xandria mumbled. “Throat hurts. Brain hurts more.”

 

“We can fix all of that,” Tony murmured. “Helen can get your throat fixed up. And the professors are still here. We'll have you right as rain in no time.” He and Wanda glanced at each other when tears gathered behind Xandria's lashes.

 

“It all _hurts_ ,” she whispered. Wanda ran her fingers through Xandria's hair, gently working out the knots she encountered in the auburn curls.

 

“Let us help, Xandria. Please?”

 

Xandria opened her eyes and met Wanda's gaze. Tears slipped down the side of her face.

 

“Will you let us help, Xanadu?” Tony squeezed Xandria's fingers gently.

 

And, just as gently, Xandria nodded.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	16. Breaking News

“Do we have to watch this?”

 

“I just want to make sure everyone is okay.”

 

“Coulson could just give us a report.”

 

“I don't trust any intel coming out of the base. Not if Ross' hands have been on it.” Steve shook his head. Sam sighed and settled back into his corner of the couch.

 

Their TV took up a stretch of wall nearly as long as the couch. And at the moment it was tuned to one of the 24-hour news cycles that covered Avengers activities. Reporters on the ground in California tracked a quinjet as it sped by overhead and swooped in for a landing. Steve only looked away when Bucky grumbled a hello on his way to the kitchen.

 

“Don't eat all the shredded wheat this time,” Sam called. Bucky's response was too mumbled to hear. But that didn't mean the intent wasn't clear. Sam rolled his eyes at Steve who just shrugged.

 

“It's been six months, man. He's gotta get over this. I want to go home.”

 

“I do too...” Steve trailed off as the first members of the team appeared on the screen.

 

“Reports are coming in that Iron Man and Hawkeye have been spotted on the other side of the city. The team appears to be tracking an active Hydra cell somewhere in central LA.”

 

The screen split in half as someone in the studio joined in on the report.

 

“Do we know who's on the ground, Allison?” The woman in the studio rifled through the papers in front of her before looking intently into the camera.

 

“Black Widow was seen in the pilot's seat of the quinjet. Reports of a blue and red blur indicate that the Maximoff twins are on the ground as well. We haven't – wait... Talia, I'm getting word from Micah on the other side of town. We're going to him for the rest of the story.”

 

Steve frowned as the feed blinked out. It came back on a minute later, a new reporter to the side of the frame as the camera tracked the combat going on behind him.

 

“Talia, I'm reporting live from the site of the battle. We're about a block back but, as you can see, we have a clear view of the Avengers dealing with a Hydra cell that tried to take action here in the heart of Los Angeles.”

 

“Pietro, Wanda, Tony, Clint, Natasha. That's damn near a full compliment,” Steve muttered. Bucky grunted his agreement as he came to stand behind the couch, a bowl of cereal in one hand.

 

“I swear to god if that's my shredded wheat -”

 

“It's not your shredded wheat, Wilson. Don't go rufflin' your feathers.”

 

“Oh, you wanna go -”

 

“Guys!” Steve leaned forward and frowned at the TV.

 

A new figure had appeared, one dressed in a black jumpsuit that clung to her curves. With her short hair and black uniform, she could have been Natasha. But her hair color was wrong. And she didn't move like Natasha. Steve pointed at her, then slid to the edge of his seat and squinted as if it would make the picture any clearer.

 

“Micah, can you confirm which members of the Avengers are on the scene? Has Captain Rogers been sighted?”

 

Steve flinched back from the TV for a moment before he leaned back in, eyes tracking the unknown fighter.

 

“There's still no word on Captain Rogers, unfortunately. But we have had sightings of Iron Man, Black Widow, Hawkeye, Scarlet Witch, and Quicksilver. And, for the first time since Lagos, Miss Miracle has joined the team on a mission!”

 

Bucky froze. Sam and Steve exchanged startled glances before turning to Bucky. His wide eyes were locked on the screen.

 

“Miss Miracle is one of the more reclusive team members. What little we've gathered on her indicates that she is a telepath much like Wanda Maximoff.”

 

“Is Sergeant Barnes on the scene as well? They were both last seen in Lagos.” Talia rifled through her papers again, an edge of excitement in her voice.

 

“Neither Barnes nor Wilson have been seen since Lagos, unfortunately. It seems Miss Miracle has joined the team on her own!”

 

Bucky's hand twitched and Sam scrambled off the couch with a cry as ceramic shards and cereal mess rained down from overhead.

 

“Buck?” Steve eased off the couch, his eyes locked on Bucky.

 

“She...they...” Bucky clenched his jaw as blood welled in his injured hand.

 

“Sam, first aid kit?”

 

“On it.”

 

“Buck, you need to sit down.”

 

Steve reached for Bucky and stopped when his friend jerked away.

 

“What the... the _fuck_ is she doing there?” Bucky looked at Steve with a wild fury in his eyes.

 

“I don't know, Buck. But we've gotta get your hand wrapped up. You're bleeding everywhere.”

 

“She... she was supposed to _leave_.” Bucky turned back to the TV. Sam reappeared with the first aid kit and handed it to Steve before vanishing back down the hall.

 

“I know, I know,” Steve murmured. He pulled bandages and disinfectant from the pack. Bucky didn't react when Steve began to pull debris from his hand.

 

“Why did she stay?” Bucky's voice faded as he stared at the TV.

 

The camera zoomed in as if in answer. Steve and Bucky watched as someone blew the windows out of a building that towered above the street fight. Ruby and scarlet shields appeared over the team as Wanda and Xandria held off the debris. The two shared a look and Xandria turned to relay something to Clint as he arrived at her side. She motioned to the building and both of them nodded.

 

Clint took off in one direction and Xandria looked up directly into the camera. She frowned and waved the civilians further back. The camera drew away, the feed cut back to the studio, and Xandria was gone. But not before Bucky got one good look at her. At the cold in her eyes that he had never seen before. At the uniform that looked nothing like the one influenced by his own Howling Commando colors. And at the dog tag chain that peeked out from between her collar and the shorn ends of her hair.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	17. Three of a Kind

Xandria dropped into the chair beside Wanda and slumped forward onto the tabletop. Wanda's hand rubbed small circles into her back and Xandria flashed an exhausted sense of gratitude across their bond.

 

“Look alive, ladies. We've got visitors.” Natasha slid into a chair across the table.

 

“ _You_ look alive,” Xandria grumbled. “You didn't even leave the jet in LA. That was a nightmare.”

 

“I can see that.” Natasha leaned across the table and plucked a piece of glass from Xandria's hair.

 

“I wasn't sure I liked the new 'do. But it does make clean-up easier!” Pietro appeared beside his sister and flashed Xandria a grin when she glowered up at him.

 

“How are you this peppy? You haven't even had food yet.”

 

“Some of us go on more than one mission a month,” Pietro nodded sagely. “You're just out of shape.”

 

“The mission wouldn't have been that bad without if those damn news crews hadn't been hovering around,” Xandria murmured. Pietro only laughed.

 

“You'll learn to love the cameras!”

 

Xandria tensed and Wanda began rubbing her back once more. The bond between their minds kept Xandria's newly-formed wards stable. And it gave Wanda insight into her friend's thoughts.

 

_Maybe it'll bring him back. Seeing you in action, I mean._

 

 _It doesn't matter_. Xandria sat up abruptly. She pulled her shoulders back and ran tense fingers through her hair. _If he wanted to come back, he would have._

 

_Xandria -_

 

Xandria cut Wanda a sharp look. Wanda let their bond go silent, but her hand found Xandria's under the table. For a moment Xandria's hand remained stiff in Wanda's. Then Ross appeared in the doorway and Xandria's tension shifted focus. Her fingers interlaced with Wanda's as Ross threw a curt nod at the three mutants seated before him.

 

“You all did a wonderful job in Los Angeles this morning.” Ross took his place at the head of the table.

 

Xandria glanced into the hall, then cast her mind out for the rest of the team. The nearest mind – aside from Ross' security detail – was a lone agent several rooms away.

 

“Where's Tony?” Xandria turned back to Ross with a frown. The interruption wasn't polite, but Ross' niceties never led anywhere good. She was met with the Secretary's matching displeasure.

 

“Mr. Stark has other business to attend to." Ross tensed his jaw, then gave a harsh sigh. "I called this meeting because, as the only three mutants on the Avengers team, I felt it necessary that I discuss the upcoming Accords with you.”

 

Pietro tensed. It sent a ripple of anxiety down the line of mutants and back again.

 

“You mean the nonhuman registry.” Xandria kept her tone flat even as Wanda's fingers tightened on hers. Ross scowled for a moment before he forced his features into his usual neutral mask.

 

“That is part of the Accords, yes.” Ross clasped his hands behind his back. “But more than that, it is a means of putting power -”

 

“Back in the hands of the people. We know.” Xandria glanced up at Natasha. “Not that I mind Natasha being here, but how does she fit into a 'brief the mutants' meeting?”

 

“Ms. Romanov is here because this is more than a 'brief the mutants' meeting, as you put it.” Ross spun a file folder around on the table and slid it to Xandria. She passed it to Wanda without looking at it. Ross frowned and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. Only then did Xandria look away.

 

She and Pietro leaned in as Wanda opened the file and flipped through the papers inside.

 

“Another mission? Already?” Xandria looked to Natasha for confirmation.

 

“The public reacted well to all three of you. We want to keep that positive publicity moving as we draw closer to the UN Summit.”

 

Another ripple of discomfort passed back and forth between Xandria, Wanda, and Pietro.

 

“Are you ready for another mission, Miracle?” Natasha's voice was several shades softer than Ross'. Wanda pushed a sense of support across their bond as Xandria looked up.

 

“I think so.” Xandria nodded. “I might need a couple of days to rest up and heal from LA. But I should be fine by the mission date.”

 

“Good.” Ross cut in before Natasha could say whatever it was that had her hands tense on in her lap. “You have three days to prepare. Ms. Romanov will be your commander.”

 

Ross gave them each a nod then bustled out. Half the tension in the room went with him.

 

“So, Commander. What's the plan?” Xandria settled back in her chair. Natasha cracked a small smile.

 

“You three have the file.” Natasha motioned to the folder in front of Wanda. “Memorize the contents and come to me with any questions. The three of you will be going in on your own. It's a small local problem that we've been asked to step in on.”

 

“How much combat should we expect?” Pietro motioned to the folder. “This is an awfully big folder for something small and local.”

 

“The combat risk is high. Which is part of why the three of you are going in. Ross wants to see how Xandria holds up in a high-fire situation.”

 

“What about Tony?” Xandria frowned. “Did he approve this mission? I know we're running with the... Accords... but Tony is still supposed to be in charge of the Avengers.”

 

The unspoken “ _since Steve left_ ” haunted the air above the table.

 

“Tony isn't wild about it. But he knows it's publicity we need.”

 

 _Is she telling the truth?_   Xandria pushed the thought at Wanda. It wasn't that she didn't trust Natasha, because she did. But Xandria knew men like Ross. They were  **not** to be trusted.

 

 _As far as I can tell._ Wanda reached for Xandria's hand again. But this time Xandria shifted away.

 

“If Tony has greenlit the mission, I won't argue.”

 

Natasha nodded and stood. Xandria, Wanda, and Pietro followed suit. Natasha waved them out and they filed into the hall. Nobody spoke. They didn't have to, not once Natasha veered off down a side corridor. Telepathy wasn't necessary to know they all shared the same thought. Ross could claim the mission was good PR all he wanted. The twins and Xandria knew they were being used. They just didn't know how to stop it.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	18. Machinations

“Sam?” Steve made his way down the dim hall to Sam's room.

 

Sam sat on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees and a familiar silver phone clasped in both hands. He tapped the phone rhythmically against his chin. The tapping stopped when Steve appeared in the doorway, but Sam didn't look up when he spoke.

 

“How's he doing?”

 

Steve sighed and shook his head. He wedged his shoulder against the door frame and folded his arms over his chest.

 

“About well as you'd think. He really thought she would just pack up when he left. Go back to Xavier.”

 

“Like she'd be any safer there?” Sam frowned up at Steve but neither man pursued the argument. It had been done before. It only ended in a shouting match between at least two of them.

 

Steve nodded toward the phone instead.

 

“What did Coulson want?”

 

Sam sighed and tossed the phone down beside him on the bed. The SHIELD logo on the back stood out matte against the gleaming silver case.

 

“ _I_ called _him_ , actually.” Sam rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “Thought maybe we could go home now. Those two could patch up whatever it is they've still got and we could go back to our team.”

 

“Our family,” Steve murmured.

 

It wasn't a correction. It was a confirmation, a sign he understood the pain Sam was in. That he understood what leaving had cost all of them. Sam flinched all the same.

 

“Well, our family isn't in a position to take us back just yet. Not according to Coulson's intel.”

 

Steve frowned and Sam shrugged, then rose from the bed. He motioned at the phone. The gesture was casual but sat at odds with the tension in his shoulders.

 

“You're welcome to call him too.” Sam shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. Steve didn't move as Sam wandered away from the bed and toward the window. It wasn't much of a view; their apartment was set into the ground floor. But it beat staring at Steve's tense shoulders.

 

“They're angry enough that they won't take us back?”

 

Sam shook his head. A bitter smile twisted his lips.

 

“No, no it goes deeper than that.” He struggled against the parody of a smile and turned back to Steve. “Ross has his hooks in deep. Tony's pissed and I don't blame him. But he'd get over it. It's Ross we gotta worry about. That man sees Bucky as an asset in the worst way. Coulson's pretty sure he'd use your boy as a present. Wrap him up in a bow and hand him off in exchange for political favors.”

 

“So? Let him.”

 

Bucky appeared behind Steve's shoulder. Sam blinked once. Then twice. A scowl settled on his face as he clenched his jaw.

 

“You can't be serious. After six months of hiding out in safe houses, you wanna walk back into whatever execution Ross has planned for you. Now? All because your girl didn't run back home when you took off on her?”

 

Bucky rocked a half-step forward, fists clenched, then caught himself. He shook his head and slowly eased his hands open as he stepped back again.

 

“I want to go talk to her, convince her to get out of there. Explain why I left.”

 

“What good is that going to do? You'll just have to leave her again. And this time you won't have the option of coming back.”

 

“Sam -” Steve's tone carried a warning but Sam shook his head.

 

“You think I'm kidding? A lot of people don't buy the whole 'mind wipe' thing. Xandria is your biggest piece of evidence you're telling the truth and she's a mutant.”

 

“What's wrong with mutants?” Bucky growled. This time he didn't hesitate when he stalked a little closer to the room. Sam shook his head again.

 

“There's nothing wrong with being a mutant. But – look, you have to look at the big picture here. The Accords will be signed in a couple of weeks. When they are, her name and information go on a registry. A goddamn _registry,_ Barnes. Are you picking up on what that word means? She'll officially be classified 'nonhuman'. How much trust do you think people will have in a nonhuman?”

 

Silence flooded in as Sam fell silent. Understanding lit Bucky's eyes, fury close on its heels. Sam nodded.

 

“Exactly. You walk back into Ross' hands and you'll be dead in a month. Then Xandria will be registered _and_ alone.”

 

“Then what do we do? I can't stay here while she's facing all of that!”

 

“If you'd talked to her instead of taking off, you wouldn't have to!”

 

“Sam!” Steve grimaced as Bucky slammed into his back. The blonde's broad frame was the only thing between his friends.

 

“It's the truth, Steve. And you know it! We both knew this was stupid. We accepted that before we'd packed our bags. But he was going to pop smoke no matter what. And you had to protect him, I get that. For me, going with you two was the only option because I don't play house with people like Ross. But you,” he paused to point at Bucky. “You really thought she'd leave the team? Leave the twins – leave _Wanda_? That she'd just go back to the school like she never knew you? How was that going to work? She'd just be so sad that -”

 

“She was supposed to **hate me**!” Bucky snarled as he slammed into Steve again. But the shock on Sam's face seemed to break through Bucky's rage. He slumped back against the wall across from the bedroom door.

 

“She was supposed to hate me. Hate me so much that she'd have to leave the base, the team. It's... it's too dangerous for her. And if she hated me – hated the place we shared – she'd leave.”

 

Steve threw Sam a warning look – a warning to stay back in case Bucky shot forward again – and slowly turned to face Bucky.

 

“Did you really think she would, Buck? Miracle? _Xandria_?”

 

“I don't think that woman knows _how_ to hate someone,” Sam added.

 

“She does,” Bucky muttered, head down. “You guys don't know her the way I do...did.” Bucky's hands clenched and relaxed at his side as he struggled to work through the remainder of his anger. “She could hate. Did hate a few people.”

 

“Okay, so she _can_ hate,” Sam cut in. “But do you really think she could hate _you_? Did you even notice the way she looked at you? It was like something out of a Disney movie.”

 

Bucky shook his head and finally looked back at Sam.

 

“You don't know... I promised her things. Made her think... she hates being left behind. Abandoned.”

 

Steve tensed as understanding set in. Sam's jaw slowly dropped.

 

“Don't tell me you proposed and then ditched her?” Anger edged Sam's words and, for once, Steve nodded in agreement.

 

“Never.” Bucky's own anger flared but he wilted under the combined glares of the other two men. “I wouldn't. But I did... I promised to be there. To protect her. Told her she...she was mine. And I was hers. And to her, that meant -”

 

“That meant the same thing. It meant the same damn thing and you still _left_?” Steve's indignation was quiet, dark, and hard. Bucky winced and looked away. Sam glanced up at Steve and only looked back at Bucky when he was sure the bigger man wasn't going to move.

 

“If I stayed, she'd have a target on her back. I thought if I left her, she'd hate me enough to go back home. That she'd...she'd want to get away from everything we shared. She'd be safe with her family.”

 

“Not after the Accords,” Sam murmured. Bucky glared at him over Steve's shoulder but one look from Steve pinned him in place against the wall.

 

The three stood in silence, locked in place by the pain on Bucky's face and the anger on Steve's.

 

“I knew this was a stupid idea,” Steve growled after a long minute. “And I knew you broke her heart. But this, Buck? This is beyond stupid. We left our team – our _family_ because you thought this would keep her safe. And now you -”

 

Steve cut off, jaw tight.

 

“I can make this right.” Bucky wouldn't look up as he spoke. “Tell them I made you come. Go back and convince her to leave, then -”

 

“No. Absolutely not.” Steve's tone shut down any argument Bucky might have had. “I'm going to call Coulson and see what's going on. You just sit tight. If we're lucky he can get us a line to the team. If not, I'll think of something else.”

 

Steve turned, snatched the phone from Sam's bed, and stormed off down the hall. Bucky only pushed away from the wall when the front door slammed shut behind Steve. He glanced at Sam but the other man just shook his head.

 

“I've got nothing to add to that. At least, nothing you're not already thinking.”

 

Bucky nodded and made his way further down the hall to his own room. Sam watched him go with a shake of his head. They probably could have gone back without a problem if it hadn't been for Ross. Ross and the fallout from the Accord just waiting to swallow them all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	19. Girls' Night

Xandria didn't look up when the knock sounded on her bedroom door.

 

“Not today, Wanda.”

 

“Not today, not yesterday. Not last week. You've been cooped up for months.” Wanda let herself into the room and stood in the open doorway, arms crossed over her chest and a frown on her lips.

 

“Not cooped up. Training. Big difference.”

 

“So this is training?” Wanda motioned to the bare-bones room and arched a brow. Xandria only shrugged.

 

Her room with the Maximoffs was a far cry from the homey space Xandria had shared with Bucky. It was a fraction the size and contained only a dresser, a twin bed, and the door to an attached bathroom. Xandria's uniform hung on a hook against one otherwise bare wall. The quilt folded at the foot of Xandria's bed was the only warm note in an otherwise barren room.

 

“I'm reading the Accords. Someone needs to know what this damned thing actually says.”

 

“Tony does. I can promise you that.”

 

Xandria grunted softly but didn't look up. Wanda shifted her weight from one foot to the other. Pietro's presence pressed against her mind. She shooed him off, certain that he was not the right person to pull Xandria back into the world. At least, not yet.

 

“Debrov was asking about you. He says he's got a lemon poppy seed muffin waiting for you when you come back in.” Wanda conjured up a bright smile when that finally got Xandria to glance up from the Accords.

 

The women stared at each other for a moment. Xandria's eyes softened and hope flickered in Wanda's chest. Then Xandria shook her head and went back to the Accords.

 

“Not tonight. Maybe after our next mission.”

 

“Our next mission isn't for another three days.”

 

“Then you can tell Debrov he'll see me in four or five. Depends on we get back.”

 

Xandria stuck a placeholder in her copy of the Accords and set it aside. She leaned forward and stretched before unfolding her legs and sliding off the narrow single bed.

 

“I thought you were training?” Wanda arched a brow as Xandria crossed to her dresser.

 

“I am. First intel, now a little combat training. It'll help me process the horror show I've been reading about.”

 

“That bad, huh?”

 

Xandria paused, a set of workout clothes in one hand.

 

“It's a registry, Wanda. They can dress it up however they want. But at its core, that's all it is.” Xandria snagged a pair of sneakers and slipped past her friend. Pietro waited in their living room, his attention focused unconvincingly on the book in his hand.

 

Xandria nodded a greeting as she strode past him and out of the apartment.

 

“So, no girls' night tonight?” Pietro dropped the book once Wanda had wandered back into the living room.

 

“I guess not.” Wanda frowned at the front door. “At least not until the nightmares start.”

 

* * *

 

 

Xandria grunted as the sparring dummy's fist connected with her stomach. It was more an android than a dummy, especially with Friday's voice coming out every now and then with a progress report.

 

“You still telegraph your intention, Miss Wesson.”

 

“Working on it,” Xandria grunted.

 

“Roll your shoulders down and back. You'll be less tempted to lead with your hips if your chest is open. Smaller lead space, less telegraphing.”

 

The sparring dummy pulled back to its resting position as Natasha entered the training room. Xandria wiped away the sweat on her brow with one arm and gave Natasha a grateful nod.

 

“Noted. Any other tips I can use? My hand to hand is a little rusty.”

 

“You need to strength train your wrists and forearms. Friday can set up a training routine for you.”

 

“Already done, Ms. Romanov.” The dummy tipped its head toward Natasha in confirmation.

 

“I'll run through that tomorrow. Thanks.” Xandria glanced at the training dummy, then at the clock. “I've been down here for a couple of hours. I should probably catch some sleep.” She flashed Natasha a thin smile and moved toward the door, fingers tugging at the wraps around her wrists.

 

“Sleep's good. Training's good too. So is getting off-base.”

 

Xandria stopped just shy of the door and slowly nodded.

 

“You've been talking to Wanda.” She turned back to Natasha.

 

“Wanda, Pietro, Tony. We're worried about you.”

 

“I'm fine.” Xandria sighed when Natasha arched a brow. “Okay, I'm not fine. I'm hurt and furious and the Accords scare the hell out of me. But I'll _be_ fine. I just need a little more time.”

 

“It's been six months, Xandria.” Natasha's voice was oddly soft and Xandria found herself nodding.

 

“I know. And I know... I know we were only together for six months. But I'm just not...” Xandria sighed and shook her head. “I just need a little more time.”

 

“You haven't gone through many of these, have you?” Natasha wandered a little closer as Xandria shook her head.

 

“I'd always seen it coming. Or I called it off before they did. What B... what he did – it came out of nowhere.”

 

Natasha shook her head, a sad smile on her lips.

 

“James does this. He thinks he's some kind of curse. And when it looks like his curse will rub off on the people around him, he takes off to protect them.”

 

Xandria bit her tongue and looked down. She'd heard this before. From multiple people. It didn't make it any easier.

 

“He did it to me too. So I know what you're feeling. And I'm telling you, it'll get better.”

 

A bitter laugh lodged in Xandria's throat. She didn't make a sound but Natasha nodded all the same.

 

“It will. I was with James for _years_. It hurt when he took off. I thought that was it for me. But it gets better. You just need to get back to your life. Your friends.”

 

This time Xandria couldn't hold back the hard bite of her laugh.

 

“Get back to my life...” Xandria spit the words back at Natasha and shook her head. “When he left you, did you tell yourself that it wasn't real love? That maybe you'd find another love like his?”

 

Xandria cut Natasha a hard look. The woman almost looked surprised but she locked down her expression before it could show in her eyes. Still, she gave Xandria a small nod.

 

“And I was right. I did.”

 

“Did you tell yourself that you must have loved him more than he loved you? That you'd find someone better one day?”

 

This time Natasha hesitated. But after a moment she nodded again. The bitter humor in Xandria's eyes faded until only anger and hurt remained.

 

“Xandria I -”

 

“I don't have that luxury, Natasha. I don't get to lie to myself. I was _in his head_. He was in mine. I knew what he felt for me and he knew...” Xandria swallowed back the tears that threatened to spill over. Faint lines of crimson snaked under her skin and she pushed those back too.

 

“I didn't -”

 

“You didn't know, right? Or you didn't think about what that meant? Nobody does.” Xandria's bitterness twisted her smile into something ugly. “You all want me to move on, to let it go. But he _knew_ leaving would tear me apart. Not my wards, not my control. But everything else. He promised -”

 

Xandria cut off again, her breathing tight and her head aching. Pressure pushed against her skin and she sucked in a deep breath to hold it back.

 

“I'm sorry.” Natasha held very still, her eyes on Xandria's even though both women knew she could see the crimson under Xandria's skin. Xandria nodded and ripped off the last of her wrist wrappings.

 

“You're sorry. Everyone's sorry. It doesn't change anything.”

 

She stormed toward the exit but Natasha called out to her.

 

“I just want to help, Xan.”

 

Xandria shook her head but she didn't slow until she stood at the door.

 

“You want to help, Natasha?” Xandria glared over her shoulder. “Then don't remind me you had him longer than I did.”

 

Xandria keyed open the door and turned away. Her anger burned away until only pain haunted her. And that wasn't something she'd ever let Natasha see.

 

“Don't remind me that he stayed with you longer than he stayed with me.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	20. Mail Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, Lovelies! I've decided to start posting updates every Monday AND Friday. Enjoy! 💖

Nobody slept well that night. Nightmares tripped through Bucky's mind and woke him every few hours. His cries, in turn, woke Steve and Sam. Bucky mumbled apologies the next morning over breakfast.

 

“Nightmares come with the territory,” Sam said with a shrug. “They happen to us all. There's no shame in that.”

 

Steve nodded his agreement and Bucky fell silent. The silence lingered until they had cleared the table.

 

“We've got a call with Coulson in fifteen minutes.” Steve didn't look at the other men. Instead, he kept his head down as he rinsed the dishes

 

“With Coulson? Or with someone back home?” Sam drummed lightly on the table.

 

“Both, if we're lucky. One of Coulson's people has been laying groundwork to connect with our team but that's no guarantee things will line up the way we need them to.”

 

Steve finished the dishes and set them aside to dry. He turned toward the other two men as he dried his hands. Sam looked up at him but Bucky's gaze remained on the far wall.

 

“Buck, you with us?”

 

Bucky nodded slowly.

 

“I'm here. Just got nothin' to add.”

 

Sam glanced at Bucky with a frown but said nothing. Steve only stared.

 

“Fair enough.” He set the towel aside and pulled the phone from his pocket. “Coulson will call us. If either of you have messages for the folks back home – short messages, in case they have to be passed along later – get them ready.”

 

“Mail call...” Sam muttered.

 

It wasn't much of a joke. And nobody was in the mood for a laugh. But it pulled on a common thread. The three of them looked at one another, then moved as one to the living room.

 

* * *

 

 

“I've got good news and – well, I wouldn't call it _bad news_ so much as not the news you want.” Coulson grimaced.

 

A few quick directions from a SHIELD tech and Bucky had hooked their secure SHIELD-issued phone to the laptop. None of them wanted to miss seeing a familiar, friendly face and the phone screen was too small for all three to comfortably see at once.

 

“What's the less-than-ideal news?” Sam shrugged when the other two men looked at him. “Rip off the band aid. Then the good news will take out some of the sting.”

 

“I couldn't get any information on the Avengers' official stance on the Accords.” Coulson glanced down, probably at another screen. “Whoever runs the team's PR at the moment clearly doesn't want the team taking an official stance. There's literally nothing on any servers my people can access. And they can access a lot of servers.”

 

“Friday,” Sam muttered and the other two nodded. Coulson's brows rose in confusion.

 

“Friday is Tony's AI. She replaced Jarvis when Jarvis became Vision.”

 

Coulson's brows didn't move, despite his understanding nod and turned back to whatever screen he had up.

 

“AI, life model decoys. Things were so much simpler when all we wanted were flying cars,” he muttered.

 

Steve and Bucky glanced at one another, the shared memory dim but stable. And, for just a second, the tension around Bucky's eyes softened. The corner of his lip twitched. But it was gone before it grew into anything more.

 

Bucky's sorrows were as clear as ghosts on the man's shoulder. One of them, the man Bucky had been once upon a time. And the other, the woman who'd brought him back himself, as much as she could. The woman he'd left behind.

 

Sam cut into the moment as he glanced from one man to the other.

 

“So what's the good news?”

 

Coulson smiled.

 

“We have a guest joining us.”

 

The three men shared a quick look before their eyes darted back to the screen.

 

“I'm linking her in right now.”

 

Bucky's hand tightened on the edge of the table until the wood creaked.

 

“Easy, Buck,” Steve murmured. The creaking stopped, but Bucky maintained his white-knuckle grip.

 

“Gentlemen, say hello.” Coulson flashed them another smile before the screen split in half.

 

Natasha's smile lit up the second her eyes found Steve.

 

“I never thought I'd be so happy to see a hundred-year-old man.”

 

“Easy there, Romanov. You're no spring chicken.” Steve grinned, the first real smile he'd flashed in months.

 

Bucky slumped back in his chair and closed his eyes. Natasha's gaze flicked to him. Her smile vanished.

 

“James.” She pursed her lips. “Wish I could say I'm happy to see you. I'd be happier to kick your -”

 

“Is she okay?” Bucky cut off the rest of Natasha’s threat.

 

Natasha glanced at Steve, then Sam. The men exchanged glances but said nothing.

 

“Physically? Yes. Dr. Cho fixed her up but -”

 

“Fixed what up?” Bucky's eyes shot open as a frown settled on his face. Anger and guilt warred for control behind his eyes. Natasha scowled.

 

“She was a mess, James. It’s not my place to give details. That’s her choice. But -”

 

“Is she there?” Bucky sat forward again as Natasha clenched her jaw. Steve steadied Bucky with a hand on his shoulder.

 

“Let her finish a sentence, Buck.”

  
“I need to -”

 

“I know. Nat knows. But we won't get anywhere if you don't let her talk.”

 

Bucky clenched his jaw and slowly sat back.

 

“You're nicer than I would have been,” Natasha said.

 

“Why do you think I jumped in? We've all been a little on-edge.”

 

“Can't imagine why,” Natasha muttered under her breath as she tapped at something just off-screen. “And to answer James' question: no, she’s not here.”

 

Bucky opened his mouth and shut it again when Steve cut him a hard look.

 

“Miracle and the Maximoffs are on a mission. And, no, I can't give you details. This call alone could get me arrested. Divulging mission details would land me in a very deep hole.”

 

“We'll make this short, then.” Steve nodded, despite the way his hand clenched under the table.

 

“The short version of things is that Tony is for the Accords. Only so far as it makes us a global entity rather than vigilantes.” Natasha set aside whatever she had been tapping at. “But that still means he's in deep with Secretary Ross. Which means the team is in deep.”

 

“How are the, uh... How is the team taking it?” The implied “nonhumans” hung in the air.

 

“They're not happy but there isn't much we can do. If we'd had time to prepare counter campaigns, we might have stood a chance. But now...now all we can really do is try to limit the fallout.”

 

“There's no limiting the fallout from something like this. We've all seen the history books.” Sam leaned an elbow on the table as Natasha nodded.

 

“Some of us lived them,” Bucky muttered. The rest of the group shared uneasy looks.

 

“Is there any way we can regroup? Coulson made it pretty clear that Ross isn't our biggest fan.”

 

“Oh, he's a fan of yours. You're a national icon, he would love to have you back on the team. And Sam is a modern war hero. He'll look great in front of the press. James, on the other hand -”

 

“I get it, he wants me dead.”

 

“I honestly don't think he cares that much,” Natasha shrugged. “But he has some friends who do. And they care _a lot_. There's practically a waiting list of countries vying for extradition rights.”

 

“Not an option.”

 

“Easy, Captain. Nobody on the team likes the idea any more than you do. I've got a few ideas to curb the issue, but I'll need Miracle's help.”

 

“Do you think she'll... would she still help me?”

 

Natasha's expression softened.

 

“Of course she would. She...” Natasha cut off with a shake of her head. “She would never turn her back on you, James. On any of us. But right now she's... she's hurt. And angry. It makes her a little more stubborn. And, well... she's not happy with me at the moment.”

 

“What happened?” Steve frowned and Natasha shook her head.

 

“I tried to help and said the wrong thing. She left for the mission before I had a chance to talk to her again. But as soon as she gets back, I'll tell her we're in contact and we'll get the pieces moving so you guys can come home.”

 

Coulson nudged the subject back to the Accords and Bucky slumped back against his chair once more. He drifted in and out of the conversation, Natasha's words on a loop. _She'd never turn her back on you, James_.

 

Bucky knew she hadn't meant the words to hurt him. But they did. And, on some level, he welcomed it. It was better than the cold numbness that had settled in the places Xandria had once been.

 

“Buck?”

 

Steve's voice cut into the rut Bucky's mind had lodged in. Bucky looked up and found everyone looking at him.

 

“You have any messages for the team?”

 

Bucky's mind raced, lurched, and faltered. He waited for Xandria's presence to smooth things out the way it used to. But the last traces of her had vanished months ago. He was all alone in his head.

 

“I... Just that...” Bucky grimaced and shook his head. He looked away to gather his thoughts. The others gave him the time he needed.

 

“Tell her I'm sorry. I meant to protect her. Like... like I promised I would.” Bucky swallowed. “And that I'll... I'll explain. When we get back, I mean. If she wants me to. If she'll...” Bucky trailed off. Natasha jumped into the opening.

 

“I'll tell her. As soon as she gets back. And, James?” Natasha waited until he looked up at the screen. “She'll listen. She's still her.”

 

The others added their own messages and Coulson cut off the call. Sam and Steve leaned in as they murmured plans back and forth. Bucky could have joined, he knew that. But all he wanted to do was sleep. So he pushed back from the table and ignored Steve's eyes on his back as he made his way to his room.

 

 _She'll listen. She's still her_. The words added themselves to the loop running through Bucky's mind.

 

Xandria was still Xandria. Bucky didn't want to image the thing that could possibly change that. So Xandria would help him. But he couldn't help but wonder if she could still loved him. Or if he deserved her love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	21. The Proving Ground

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I know this chapter is late. I blame my work deadlines. But never fear! You'll still get two chapters this week per the new publishing schedule. I'll put the next one up tomorrow!

“This is **not** high-combat,” Xandria grunted.

 

Her arms shook. She'd held a shield for nearly ten minutes as the team raced through the streets amid a hail of bullets and debris. Wanda had cleared their way as Pietro did his best to dodge between the shots and take out enemy snipers along the way.

 

It was more energy than Xandria had used in months. Now, safe inside the dim entry of the boarded-up building they’d been sent to, she slumped against the wall and fought to calm her hammering heart.

 

“You wanted higher?” Pietro appeared at her side and dropped another chair in front of the door. He’d built the barricade as soon as they’d cleared the door, enemy soldiers at their heels.

 

“Gods no,” Xandria groaned as she let the shield drop. “This is **all-combat**. They damn near shot down our jet!”

 

Pietro grunted, vanished, then reappeared with yet another busted wooden office chair.

 

“Ross said he wanted to test us. I'm sure his office has some _lovely_ footage to work with.”

 

The three mutants shared a dark look in their moment of respite. Then something boomed outside the door and footsteps thundered from overhead.

 

“Break's over,” Xandria muttered. She pushed off from the wall and flexed her fingers. Faint red lines pulsed beneath her skin. They were bright in the gloom. But not bright enough.

 

“We need to get you out of here,” Pietro frowned. Xandria shook her head.

 

“We need to finish this mission.”

 

Xandria unholstered the pistol on her thigh. It felt odd in her hands, the grip still new and unfamiliar. Logan had sent it to her weeks ago. A replacement for the rifle Xandria never touched anymore.

 

“You two head down to the basement and get the data we came here for. I'm going up to clear out our guests.”

 

“Alone?” Wanda's frown made the twins look more alike than usual.

 

“I'll be fine. I just need to buy you guys a little time. Come find me as soon as you have the files transferred to the drive.”

 

“Be careful.”

 

Wanda grabbed Xandria's free hand and squeezed. Xandria paused then, gently, squeezed back.

 

“As soon as you've got the files, we're out of here. And,” Xandria gave her friend's hand another squeeze. “We'll finally go get those muffins. I promise.”

 

Wanda's relief flooded through their bond. Xandria squeezed her hand once more. Then she let go, settled both hands around the grip of her pistol, and turned toward the stairs.

 

The twins vanished in a twisting trail of blue and red. Xandria took one deep breath, then another. Being alone was still hard. She could still feel Wanda's presence in her mind. The link kept Xandria’s powers stable. But it did little to take away her fear.

 

More footsteps thumped overhead, closer this time. Xandria took another deep breath. Only one flight of stairs separated her from the upper floor of the building. It seemed like so much more without someone watching her back. Without Bucky watching her back.

 

 _Shake it off. Focus_.

 

Xandria raised her pistol and started up the stairs. The staircase wrapped around to a landing and she cast out her senses before glancing around the wall that hid the second half of the stairs from view. She felt no one, saw no one. But she could hear them shuffling just out of sight.

 

She considered goading them until they took the first shot. But she didn't have Clint's aim and if too many came at once, she'd be overrun. So she slipped around the wall and crept up the edge of the stairs, careful not to make a sound.

 

Someone moved in the shadows of the hall just beyond the stairs and Xandria fired. A body thumped to the ground as another shadow moved. Another shot, another body. Xandria tried to tell herself it was the right thing. Still, she turned away and swept the other end of the corridor before she saw too much of her handiwork.

 

A shadow ducked into a room at the far end. Xandria moved toward it, then stopped. It was Setup 101 and she knew it. But it was also the only movement she could see. So she crept toward the room, wishing all the while that she could still scan for minds as easily as she once did.

 

Grunts and thumps filtered out into the hall. Xandria strained to read something – anything – from the minds in the room. But she was still too far away. Even when she drew closer, though, all she could feel was the low buzz of unconscious minds. And the last lingering thoughts of dying men.

 

She pressed herself against the wall beside the door and took a breath. Then she leveled her gun and pushed clear of the door.

 

One man stood alone by the far wall, his jeans spattered with blood and a hood up over his head. Dead and dying men littered the floor of the room, all of them bearing the insignia of the hate group she was here to stop.

 

“They came in through the window.” The man pointed one gloved hand at the shattered windows in front of him. “I cleared most of the floor but then you started coming up... I couldn't let them hurt you.”

 

His voice rooted Xandria to the floor. So familiar, like home. The pistol shook in Xandria's hand.

 

“B-Bucky?” She hated the whine her words trailed into. But she couldn't breathe around her heart hammering in her throat.

 

The man finally turned. Dark hair, blue eyes. The lips she had traced with her own a thousand times. Xandria rocked back a step but Bucky was faster. He had always been faster. His hands were on hers and then her pistol vanished into his coat before he took her face in his hands.

 

“I'm here. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.” Bucky's lips found hers. Xandria opened to him without thought, her lips parting under his. She pulled him close, her hands fisted in the front of his jacket. Her mind nudged at his but he didn't answer her, didn't let her in.

 

 _Why?_ She pulsed the thought at him but it bounced back to her.

 

“Bucky, please -” Xandria mumbled the words against his lips, her tears hot on her cheeks. And his.

 

“It's going to be okay. It'll all be okay. I promise, doll. I promise.”

 

Xandria nudged his mind again but Bucky only slid his hands into the short waves of her hair. She wanted to believe him but it felt wrong. All wrong. And then the pain came.

 

It wasn't much. Just a little pinch at the side of her neck. But it sent icy flames rushing through her veins. Xandria stumbled back as one hand flew to her neck. Confusion bubbled in her mind even as fog rolled across her vision. She tried to call for Wanda but her thoughts slipped away before she could send them down the bond.

 

Xandria hit her knees, then slumped to the side. The fog grew thicker. She looked up at Bucky and tried to ask why. But the words would not come. He stood above her – so far above her – smiling. And in the last moments before she fell into the fog, Xandria realized it was wrong. His smile was all wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	22. Reminders

“Man, will you sit down?”

 

“No.”

 

“You're starting to make _me_ nervous.”

 

“Fuck off, Wilson.”

 

“Here I am, trying to help, and the man tells me to fuck off.” Sam shook his head. Bucky glared at him but Sam didn’t look up from the book in his hands.

 

“Will you two knock it off? Miracle and the Maximoffs have been on their mission for three days. They've got to be heading back soon. We just have to wait it out a little longer.”

 

“I don't think your buddy's gonna make it, Steve. The man's about to wear a hole in our floor.”

 

Bucky shot Sam another glare. But even he had to admit the man had a point. It had been a full day since their call with Natasha. Coulson had managed to find limited information on Xandria's mission. And, by all rights, the team should have been back on base by now. But still nobody had called.

 

“C'mon, Buck,” Steve muttered. “Sit down, eat something. Clean a gun. Play cards. Anything but the pacing.”

 

“I can't sit Steve. If I sit around any longer I swear I'll -”

 

Bucky choked off as he slammed into the far wall, surrounded by a haze of blue. Sam jumped off the couch as the sound of the front door bursting open reached them a moment too late. A heartbeat later, both Sam and Steve were flat on the floor under shimmering curtains of red.

 

“Tell me it was you,” Pietro growled. He dodged Bucky's left hook, then reappeared to land a blow across the bigger man's jaw. “ _Tell me you have her!_ ”

 

Another blue blur left another shadow of a bruise on Bucky's jaw.

 

“ _ **Do you have her?**_ ” Pietro bellowed.

 

“W-Wanda? Piet?” Steve craned his neck and tried to peer up at the twins. “What the hell are you doing here?”

 

“Looking for Xandria.” Wanda moved in from the front hall, hands held out and fingers spread wide.

 

“Looking for... you _lost her_?” Bucky's anger flared and he swung at Pietro again.

 

“You _took her_.” Pietro dodged the blow and pulled back for another punch. But the grip of his sister's power pulled him up short. Bucky tried to take the shot, but his arms held fast to the wall. Everyone seemed wreathed in red. Wanda held tight until she felt the men regain their self-control.

 

“He didn't take her.” Wanda twitched her fingers and the shimmer of her magic vanished from sight. “He doesn't know where she is. None of them do.”

 

“Latvia,” Bucky grunted as he pulled himself away from the wall. “Coulson said your mission was in Latvia.”

 

“That was the last time we saw her. Ross thinks she ran away to join you.” Wanda moved further into the apartment and offered Sam her hand. He took it, then pulled her into a tight hug.

 

“It's good to see you two. Even if you did pull a shock and awe.”

 

“Xandria is _missing_? And you thought she came here?” Bucky looked from one twin to the other.

 

“I think you two need to fill us in.” Steve stood and motioned to the table. “Starting with how you got past our wards and read our minds. Xandria said -”

 

“Xandria set them up. Or, in your case, strengthened them. I've been linked to her mind for six months. There's not a ward she's set up that I can't slip past.” Wanda frowned as she stepped away from Sam.

 

“Even mine?” The color drained from Bucky's face as Wanda nodded.

 

“Especially yours. Because they're **not** yours. They're Xandria's.”

 

“What are you -”

 

“Wait wait, hold on.” Steve cut his hands through his air and the group fell silent. “There's too much to unpack here. We can't keep jumping around. Sam, run a perimeter check. Bucky, sit down. Maximoffs... also sit down.” Steve motioned at the table, then turned away, confident his team would listen.

 

Sam peeled away from the group and headed out the front door. Bucky threw Pietro an uneasy glance as they moved toward the table.

 

“I...sorry,” Pietro muttered. He scrubbed a hand over his face and dropped into a chair. “She's missing and we were so certain... I'm sorry.” Now that he sat still, there was no missing the dark circles under his eyes or the tension in his jaw.

 

“Why, though?” Bucky looked from Pietro to Wanda and back. “Why us? She didn't have our location. And even if she –”

 

“She'd have come to you if she knew where to go.” Wanda cut in before Bucky finished his thought. The confidence in her voice stunned him into silence.

 

Steve reappeared and set a tray in the center of the table.

 

“Water, chips. Things to keep our hands busy.” He motioned to the food, then vanished down the hall only to return with an office chair. “We wait for Sam, then we go over everything. Together.”

 

Tense silence filled the room. Bucky's eyes snapped to the door a few minutes later. Sam stepped inside after a moment.

 

“We're all good, Cap. The neighbors didn't notice anything weird and I don't see any signs of hostiles.”

 

“Good. That means we've got time to figure this out.” Steve sat back in his chair. He pointed at Wanda. “Start with our wards.”

 

&&&

 

“I did that?” Bucky stared down at his hands as if some trace of Xandria's wards could be found there.

 

“Not intentionally, no. And we all knew that. You had no way of knowing the wards would go with you. Xandria didn't even know. She just... gave.”

 

“Is that how you found us? I know Xavier can track mutants.” Bucky looked up. “Did he track her signature or something?”

 

Wanda's frown hadn't vanished. Now it deepened.

 

“Nobody has been able to reach Professor Xavier in a week. Or anyone at the school, for that matter.” Wanda shook her head. “We found you through Natasha who found you through Coulson.”

 

“Where is Natasha?” Steven cut in.

 

“She stayed behind to keep Ross off our tail. She wanted to come, but staying was the best way to help. So she got us a jet Ross couldn't track and sent us after you.”

 

“So you and Xan have been linked up for six months. And someone snatched her without you noticing?” Sam held up his hands when Pietro glared at him. “I'm not blaming you guys. I'm thinking about logistics. That couldn't have been easy. Which means we're looking for someone who can pull off that sort of interference.”

 

Wanda laid a hand on her brother's shoulder. They looked at each other for a long moment before Pietro slowly sat back in his chair.

 

“Our bond wasn't like that. I was...” Wanda sighed and pressed her palm to her lips as she gathered her thoughts. “Xan and I were tightly bound after she left the recovery ward.”

 

Bucky flinched. Wanda had told them everything. About the night they left and the damage it had done. Guilt spilled over Bucky's wards and Wanda quietly pushed it back as she went on.

 

“She couldn't sleep without help. It was me or the drugs. And I was the safer option.” Wanda's cheeks fused with a trace of pink but she pressed on. “After a few months she could sleep on her own, but I stayed connected. She moved into our apartment so I could help her if her powers grew unstable.”

 

“Things were getting better,” Pietro added. “But then she asked to start going on missions.”

 

“She _asked_ to go on missions?” Bucky’s fist clenched and he pressed his knuckles to his mouth when Wanda nodded.

 

“She wanted to be helpful and she felt the current state of her abilities meant she could better serve as an Avenger than a therapist.” A bitter smile twisted Pietro’s lips and he took a drink of water to hide it.

 

Bucky opened his mouth but a glare from Wanda cut him short.

 

“No, we didn't try to change her mind. She'd already had enough taken from her. She deserved to make that choice for herself.”

 

Sam's eyes widened and he looked away. Even Steve winced but Bucky only nodded. Wanda had a fair point. They all knew it.

 

“Xan worked hard to improve her control, to expand her powers. She wanted to prove she could control her own powers while on a mission. And LA was her first big mission.”

 

“We saw that one,” Steve muttered. “I thought it was Natasha at first. Xan didn't... she didn't look like herself.”

 

“New uniform, new hair, new weapons. She didn't want reminders,” Pietro nodded.

 

“Dogtags,” Bucky muttered. “She... were those...”

 

“They were yours.” Wanda dug into her pocket, then tossed the tags onto the table with a faint _clang_. “And that's why we thought you had her. These were wrapped around the grip of her pistol.”

 

“Would Xan have done that?” Steve bent forward and poked gently at the worn tags. Bucky snatched them from the table. He pooled the chain in the palm of his hand and stroked a finger across the lettering as Wanda answered.

 

“Not a chance. She never took those things off. And the pistol was a gift from Logan. She'd never give it up.”

 

“So why did the tags point to Bucky?” Sam frowned.

 

“They were the one reminder she allowed. She told me that they were a crutch. One she needed. And that she'd take them off when she was ready or...or when Bucky came home. We thought that she might have left them behind to tell us she had him back. That she...she didn't need them anymore.” Wanda shrugged, then looked away. Pietro's arm slipped around her shoulders.

 

“So they got her in Latvia because she was mostly flying solo.” Sam looked to Pietro for confirmation and the younger man nodded. “That explains the how. Now we just need the who and the why.”

 

“Coulson said he would dig into that.” Wanda slowly lifted her head from her brother's shoulder. “He said to call him if we didn't find her here. He seemed confident we wouldn't but... but I had hoped.”

 

Steve reached across the table and Wanda let him take her hand.

 

“We'll find her. If Coulson is on her trail, we'll find her.” Steve looked over at Bucky.

 

“We better,” Bucky muttered.

 

“We will.” Steve's voice took on a hard edge. “I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	23. Through the Looking Glass

Something soft trailed up Xandria's spine. She frowned in her sleep and tried to shake it off.

 

“Knock it off, Piet,” she muttered into her pillow. “I'll get Wanda to zap you.”

 

A deep chuckle dragged her from the last tendrils of sleep.

 

“If Piet is touching you like this, he and I need to have a talk.”

 

Xandria scrambled off the bed, one hand out in front of her pulsing red.

 

“C'mon, doll, it was just a joke.” Bucky frowned and sat up on his knees. Tendrils of hair hung down around his face, just way Xandria liked it best.

 

“What... what are you... how...”

 

“I _was_ going to try and wake you up gently. Apparently I need to try another tactic next time.” Bucky slowly slid from the bed. He moved in closer and eased Xandria's hand down. All she could do was stare up at him, mouth agape and eyes wide.

 

Bucky traced her lower lip with the cold metal of his thumb and eased his other hand into her hair.

 

“More nightmares, darlin?” He leaned in and kissed the tip of Xandria's nose. “I told you, I've got you.”

 

Xandria blinked as tears welled behind her lashes. Something was wrong but she couldn't put her finger on it. She looked around but it was all perfect. Their books on the bedside tables. Their clothes in the closet. Her quilt at the foot of the bed. The smell of Bucky and the way his arms felt as he pulled her into his chest. Her confusion welled into panic and a sob caught in her chest.

 

“Hey, hey. It's okay. Everything's okay.” Bucky's hand smoothed over her hair and idly traced the braid that hung down her back. Her mind kicked against the sensation. But when she tried to think of why, her irritation slipped away.

 

“You wanna talk about it?” Bucky murmured.

 

“I...I don't remember it. The nightmare, I mean. Do you?” Xandria pulled back just enough to look up at him. They shared their dreams. And their nightmares. It was the nature of their bond. But Bucky shook his head.

 

“I don't, I'm sorry. It must not have lasted long.”

 

“It feels like forever.” Xandria reached up and cupped Bucky's cheek. He turned his head to press a kiss to her palm, then smiled down at her.

 

And it was wrong. It was all wrong.

 

* * *

 

“What the _hell_ is going on in there?”

 

“I don't know, sir!” A tech scrambled to make sense of the readings on his screen. “One second she was fine. She was _happy_. The program must have tripped on something it couldn't suppress. A memory or something.”

 

“Well, _fix it_.”

 

“I'm trying, sir. This system... it's not built to house a telepath.”

 

“Your team told me you could handle this. We need her to get to the Soldier. So _figure. It. Out._ ”

 

* * *

 

Something soft trailed up Xandria's spine. She frowned in her sleep and tried to shake it off.

 

“Knock it off, Piet,” she muttered in her pillow. “I'll get Wanda to zap you.”

 

A deep chuckle dragged her from the last tendrils of sleep.

 

“If Piet is touching you like this, he and I need to have a talk.”

 

_Wrong wrong wrong WRONG_

 

* * *

 

“She's pulling herself out.”

 

“She's _what_? How is that possible?!”

 

“Because she's not human.” Another man spoke up. He only shrugged when he met the other man’s fury. “She's a mutant. Our system can’t cope with her mental output.”

 

“Fix this. Without her, we have nothing to hold the Soldier with.”

 

“I don't think we can, sir. You may have to rely on more conventional means of containment.”

 

* * *

 

Something soft trailed up Xandria's spine. She frowned in her sleep and tried to shake it off.

 

“Knock it off, Piet,” she muttered in her pillow. “I'll get Wanda to zap you.”

 

A deep chuckle dragged her from the last tendrils of sleep.

 

Scarlet pulsed under Xandria's skin until it felt like the bed would catch fire.

 

* * *

 

“Call in the wet work team. Tell them to get the helmet ready. The helmet and the drugs.”

 

An agent scurried off to do as she was told.

 

“We held her longer than I thought we could.” The scientist bent over the nearest terminal and peered at the readings as they flowed down the screen.

 

“You should have tried harder.”

 

The scientist flicked an annoyed glance a the brooding man in black.

 

“You'll get your Soldier back. And, if your chemistry team has done even half the job I've done, you'll have a whole new toy to play with.”

 

* * *

 

Something soft trailed up Xandria's spine. She burned it away with a feral growl.

 

* * *

 

Xandria's eyes snapped open. She could see. But she couldn’t feel anything. Not the air on her skin or the beating of her own heart. Nothing.

 

“You're a very hard woman to keep down, Miss Wesson.”

 

Xandria tried to follow the voice but it belonged to someone outside her line of sight. And, worse still, her mind felt trapped. She could sense her own thoughts. But she couldn’t even find a way to send her senses beyond her own mind.

 

“How rude of me. Is this better?” A man moved into her line of sight and sat down on a stool beside Xandria.

 

He had dark hair and beautiful eyes. And a smile that was all wrong.

 

“You must be very confused, and I don't blame you.”

 

Something in her eyes must have gotten across the thoughts running through her mind.

 

“I'm not the one you should be angry with, Miss Wesson. I didn't leave you all alone. I didn't send you into a nest of terrorists with shaky mutations and a broken heart.” The man smiled and, for all the obvious kindness it was meant to carry, it made Xandria's skin crawl. A faint trace of heat at the base of her spine answered her anger. It wasn’t much, but it was enough.

 

“Who?” She managed the word through clenched teeth. Surprise lit the man's eyes before he looked at something behind Xandria. He looked back at her after a moment.

 

“You are so much stronger than you look. That will make this next phase much more interesting.” He leaned back on the stool, crossed his arms over his broad chest, and smile. “My name is Grant Ward. I'm the Director of Hydra.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	24. Unexpected Visitors

“We're still tracking a few leads.”

 

“It's been a week, Coulson,” Steve drummed absently on the table. “Do you have any idea who might have her?”

 

“Well... a few. We ruled out the smaller anti-mutant and anti-Avenger groups. Of which there are quite a few.” Coulson grimaced. “Which leaves us with the big guys.”

 

“How many 'big guys' are there?” Bucky leaned in toward the screen bearing Coulson's face. Coulson's gaze flicked from one supersoldier to the other.

 

“Not many. But they're harder to track.” Coulson tapped something on his desk. His face minimized to the bottom corner as a data display took over the screen. “Mostly we're looking at intelligence organizations from the more...aggressive countries. There are one or two terrorist organizations that might have the resources, but they would have made demands by now.”

 

Coulson paused but the familiar emblem had already scrolled across the screen.

 

“And Hydra,” Bucky muttered. He swallowed and pushed back from the table to pace across the living room.

 

“And Hydra,” Coulson echoed. “I'd rather find her in one of Ross' blacked out military installations.”

 

“Just...find her. Please.” Bucky moved back to the table.

 

“We will, Sergeant Barnes. And you'll be the first to know when we do.”

 

Coulson's face vanished from the screen and Steve closed the computer.

 

“Buck -”

 

“Don't.” Bucky stomped away down the hall. “Just don’t.”

 

Wanda sidestepped him on her way to the living room without looking up from her phone.

 

“Natasha still hasn't convinced the team,” she announced. “Bruce is on the fence and nobody knows where Thor is. But Tony and Rhodey are pretty certain she's with Bucky.”

 

“What about Clint?”

 

“He's off on another mission. Something to do with his sister in law. I didn't get details.” Wanda sighed and tossed her phone onto the kitchen counter. She braced her hands against the tile and pursed her lips, gaze distant. “What happens if we can't convince them? We need more firepower.”

 

“That depends on who has her.” Pietro appeared on the couch. “With a little luck, I can get in, grab her, and get out before anyone knows we've found their location.

 

“What about our luck in the last six months makes you think that's going to happen?” Sam asked as he stopped at the end of the hall. He jerked a thumb over his shoulder, back toward the bedrooms. “I don't mind you two being here, but sharing a room with that man is _unbearable_. He just sits in there and does his Thousand Yard Stare.”

 

Steve's brow furrowed. He glanced down the hall, then pushed away from the table and moved to Wanda's side.

 

“Are we losing him?”

 

Shock flowed across Wanda's face, irritation close on its heels.

 

“Is that really what you're worried about? Xandria is missing. She could be dead and you -”

 

“Read my mind.” Steve frowned down at Wanda. “Look inside and then ask me if I'm not worried about Xandria.”

 

Wanda's irritation held a moment longer until it withered under Steve's gaze.

 

“I'm just as scared as the rest of you. But if Bucky slips back into... if he becomes... if he _relapses_ , we're going to have an even bigger mess on our hands. And it might derail any chance we have to bring Xandria home.”

 

“He's... holding on.” Wanda looked toward the hall. “His guilt is so intense it almost hurts, even with Xandria's wards in place. But he wants to bring her home, to make sure she's okay. So he's holding on.”

 

Steve nodded and scrubbed a hand over his stubble.

 

“Best we can hope for, I guess.”

 

Sam opened his mouth, then cut off short when someone knocked at the front door. Everyone glanced at the door, then turned to Wanda. She only shook her head as red lightning sparked between her fingers. Pietro was at her side in a blink. Steve moved toward the door as Bucky appeared at Sam's side, pistol in his hand as he handed Sam a second gun.

 

Steve glanced at the team one more time, then reached for the knob.

 

“Your neighbors are staring. Let me in.”

 

Tension bled out of the room, then rushed back in like a riptide.

 

“Natasha?” Wanda was past Steve before the man could move. She wrenched open the door and dragged the other woman inside. “What are you doing here?”

 

“Hello to you too.” Natasha threw her usual cocky smile at Wanda but it vanished as Sam shot forward and pulled her against his chest.

 

“It's so damn good to see you.”

 

“You too, Sam. Nothing's been the same since -”

 

“I know.” Steve chimed in when Natasha cut off.

 

Sam released Nat and she dragged Steve into a tight embrace.

 

“We'll fix this, right? Together. Like you said. Win or lose, we do it together.”

 

Steve grimaced as Natasha stepped back but she caught his hands and squeezed until he looked at her.

 

“This is still 'together', Rogers. Taking off with James... I get it. He's part of the team, one of us. Letting him go off alone isn't how we work.”

 

“Could've gone about it better,” Pietro mumbled. Natasha glared at him and he vanished only to reappear on the couch.

 

“He's right,” Bucky mumbled. The team turned to him as he clicked on his pistol's safety.

 

“We need to talk.” Natasha gave Wanda a smile as she passed. Then her focus was back on Bucky.

 

Bucky glanced at Steve, then shrugged.

 

“I'm going to go put this away.”

 

Natasha followed him down the hall. She didn't speak until they were in the room Sam and Bucky now shared with the door firmly closed.

 

“Steve can still hear you,” Bucky muttered.

 

“Wanda can read your mind from the parking lot if she wanted to. And Pietro is probably listening outside the door.” Natasha kicked back at the door and a faint thump in the hall confirmed her suspicion.

 

Bucky grunted and set his pistol on his bedside table.

 

“What do you want, Nat?”

 

“I want my family back together.” Natasha frowned. Bucky only stared at her. “This stunt didn't work with me. Why on earth did you think it would work with Xandria?”

 

“Because she's not like us.” Bucky crossed his arms over his chest.

 

Natasha arched a brow and sat on the foot of Bucky's bed.

 

“She's more like us than you think, James. And she loves you.”

 

“Loved,” Bucky corrected her. His jaw twitched and he had to look away. “After what I did -”

 

“She was devastated. And if she were anyone else, I don't know if she'd forgive you. You fucked up, James. In the most spectacular fashion possible.” Natasha shook her head. “But that woman loves you. Really, truly loves you.”

 

Bucky's arms tightened over his chest, poor armor against Natasha's words.

 

“What's your point?” His words came out thick and Natasha didn't have to see his face to understand his pain.

 

“My point is that when we get her back – and I mean _when_ ,” Natasha pushed when Bucky looked up with despair in his eyes. “When we get her back, you need to tell her how you really feel. And you need to make sure that you never pull a stunt this stupid on her again.”

 

“I don't know if I'll even have the chance.”

 

“We'll get her back -”

 

“That's not what I mean.” A bitter smile flickered on Bucky's lips before it died. “We'll get her back. I refuse to believe anything else. But... after. When she's home.... she deserves better. And Ross -”

 

“Ross won't get his hands on you,” Natasha rose from the bed, her own jaw tense. “I promise you that. As for Xandria... let her make that call, okay? You're right, we _will_ get her back. And when we do, stop making choices for her. She's a big girl. She can make her own choices.”

 

Natasha moved close enough to give Bucky's arm a squeeze. Then she was gone. Bucky didn't move, couldn't move. They'd bring her home. They had to. Because if they didn’t, Bucky wasn’t sure what he would do. All he knew for certain is that he’d find whoever took her. And then a lot of people would die.

 

* * *

 

“I can't believe you're going to the signing.”

 

The team had gathered around the kitchen table, though Bucky remained in his room.

 

“I don't really have a choice, Sam.” Natasha frowned up at her friend. “And it will be good to have someone on-site to keep an eye on things. Someone critical of what's going on.”

 

“Someone on our side, you mean,” Pietro added.

 

“I wouldn't call it 'our side', exactly,” Natasha hedged but Pietro was having none of it.

 

“It's a registry. There's 'our side' and then there's the wrong side. End of discussion. The rest of it I don't care so much about. Tony or Steve gives me an order, I trust it. But the registry?” Pietro shook his head. “My people know registries. They always lead to pain.”

 

Sam nodded along, arms crossed over his chest and brow furrowed.

 

“He's right,” he added. “He's right and we all know it. But Natasha's got a point. Having someone critical but low-key about it will be an asset. People will talk and she can listen.”

 

“What I don't understand,” Wanda murmured. She hadn't spoken since letting Natasha in and the group turned to her as she broke her silence. “Is why you're still with Ross in the first place. You don't like him any more than we do. You don't like the Accords. So why stay?”

 

Natasha glanced at Steve, then Sam, then back to Wanda. She took a moment to answer and, when she did, her words came slowly.

 

“Before Lagos, I told Xandria that we needed to play ball with Ross. That it was.... that we didn't want to seem at odds with the US government. Not after, well... not after Sokovia.”

 

Wanda flinched and Natasha reached out to squeeze the other woman's hand before sitting back once more.

 

“Lagos made it even more important to get on the government's good side. And then James took off with Steve and Sam.” Natasha shook her head and sighed when she realized Wanda's frown was only deepening.

 

“Look at it like this,” Natasha began again. “Who are the non-humans on the team?”

 

Wanda glanced at Pietro. He shrugged and began ticking names off on his fingers.

 

“Me, Wanda, Xandria,” he paused for a moment. “Banner if you count irradiation. Viz, Thor, and the supersoldiers. So Barnes and Rogers.”

 

“And me,” Natasha finished with a nod. “Now which of those people are still on-base?”

 

Wanda's eyes widened as understanding came over her.

 

“Banner and Viz and you.”

 

“Banner isn't likely to make the registry because he's classified as “sick”, not non-human,” Natasha held up one finger. “Nobody can agree if Viz is a person or a machine.”

 

Wanda scowled but Natasha pushed on.

 

“That leaves me. The sole non-human left on the base. As far as the public can tell, the team split apart along human and non-human lines, with the exception of Sam. It doesn't look good. And if it gets worse, we lose all our bargaining power.”

 

Natasha sat back and let her words sink in.

 

“Shit,” Pietro muttered.

 

“Shit is right,” Natasha agreed. “And that's why I stay. To try and smooth the way for us to maybe break the registry down, or get everyone back into the government's good graces. We will work better from the inside.”

 

The team shared uneasy looks. A few people opened their mouths, then closed them again before saying anything.

 

“I have to get back anyway.” Natasha rose from the table. “Bruce can only cover for me for so long.”

 

“So that's how you got away.” Steve rose from the table to follow her out. Natasha paused long enough to hug her friends, then made her way to the door.

 

“He's not happy about any of this. I think he's going to take a little vacation of his own soon. Stress tends to bring out the Big Guy.”

 

Steve hummed in agreement as they walked toward Natasha's car. It was low-key and local, probably bought with cash as soon as Natasha touched down.

 

“You didn't come all this way to check on us, did you?” Steve stopped short of the car.

 

Natasha's bitter smile could have been its own answer.

 

“I wanted to see you all before you saw me at the summit.” She glanced around for any eavesdroppers. “But I needed to talk to James. To see how he was doing and to...” She cut off with a sigh. Steve nodded.

 

“We should have told you what he wanted to do. You might have been able to head this whole mess off.”

 

“Well, you know what they say about hindsight.” Natasha tried for a more genuine smile. She gave up after a moment.

 

“I'll just have to make sure we run things by you from here on out.”

 

“You better. I hate picking up after you guys.” A smile finally came to Natasha's face as she gave Steve a final hug. “Take care of yourselves, okay? And...and bring her home. All of you... come home.”

 

“We're trying. Believe me, we're trying.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	25. Resilience is Never Easy

Pain. Pain and blood...so much blood. Xandria didn't know where the blood came from, not anymore. She didn't know where the pain began and ended. The only thing she knew any more was that she wasn't cooperating. That's all that mattered.

 

“I don't -” Ward cut off. He hissed a sigh between his teeth and drummed his fingers against the table by the door. “It doesn't have to be this hard, Alexandria. All you have to do – all you've ever had to do – is tell us how you broke the Soldier's programming. We can't replicate it without a telepath, so what's the harm? Hm?”

 

Xandria jerked her head to one side. It hurt too much to talk, but Ward got the point all the same. His fist came down on the table. Xandria jumped against her bonds and agony swarmed through her.

 

“So... stubborn!” Ward's voice grew louder as he moved closer and a mirthless chuckle undercut his words. “All this to protect a man that abandoned you.”

 

Ward crouched down until Xandria had no choice but to look at him. It hurt too much to even try and raise her head. It hurt too much to look away. Ward reached up and gently pushed a blood-soaked clump of hair back behind Xandria's ear.

 

“I could give him back to you, you know. Make all this pain go away. Make sure you're never without your Soldier again.” Ward smiled and its wrongness washed over Xandria. “I'm not the bad guy here, Alexandria.”

 

Her own name made Xandria's stomach roil. It was all he called her, all any of the Hydra agents called her.

 

“All you have to do is tell us what you did. How you put Bucky Dumpty back together again. And all the pain stops.”

 

Xandria stared at Ward. Her eyes were bruised and one was swollen shut. But she managed to bring him into focus. His brows rose as if to encourage her. Xandria opened her mouth. And spit in his face.

 

Ward lurched back. Blood and saliva dripped down his cheek despite his attempts to wipe it away.

 

“Fine. The hard way, then.” He glared down at her, though Xandria couldn't look up enough to see the expression. Ward crossed to the door and knocked. An agent let him out and closed the door behind him.

 

Three men waited for Ward in the small room beyond Xandria's cell.

 

“Well?” Ward motioned back toward the cell door. “Get to work.”

 

The men glanced at one another. The oldest shook his head.

 

“She's one session away from dead, sir.”

 

“So run a half-session. Figure something out. I _want that information_.”

 

“We could... we could wipe her, sir. The way they wiped the Soldier.”

 

Ward pursed his lips and leveled a cold look at the man.

 

“If you have a way to fit four decades of conditioning into a week, I'd love to hear it.”

 

Ward looked at each man in turn. A predator's smile curled his lips when none of them would meet his eyes.

 

“You've already had a week with her. We move on to Phase 3 in seven days, gentlemen. If we don't have her methods by then, there won't _be_ a Phase 4. And all of this – every mission for the last eight months – has been so we can reach Phase 4.”

 

“I might be able to help.” A fourth man sauntered into the room. Ward turned to face him and arched a brow when the man held up a vial.

 

“More mutation suppressant? I thought her dose was already at critical levels.”

 

“Oh, not a suppressant. An accelerant... of sorts.” The man smiled and handed Ward the vial. “It's a little something I mixed up when it became clear these brutes wouldn't get anything from her.”

 

The three men glared at the doctor but Ward only arched a brow to encourage an explanation.

 

“Phase one found more than a dusty old notebook. They found serum. Still viable, if a little unstable. I mixed in a few odds and ends, then tested it on one of our... less useful guests.”

 

“You want me to turn her into a supersoldier? Dr. Radcliffe, she'd kill us all.”

 

“Not if we time it right.” Dr. Radcliffe held up a finger and pulled out his phone. He pulled up the calendar and handed the phone to Ward. “This isn't the high-quality stuff Steve Rogers had access to. It'll take more than one dose to get her powered up.”

 

Ward looked over the timetable and arched a brow.

 

“I still fail to see how increasing her strength and abilities will benefit us, Doctor.”

 

The doctor tsked and snatched his phone back from Ward. Ward pursed his lips but said nothing as the doctor pulled up another program and handed the phone back.

 

“The serum causes extreme confusion. I propose we spread her serum dosage out across the remaining week. She'll be so disoriented that we can stick her back in the Framework and she'll never know the difference. By the time we pull her out, we'll have the Soldier and the information. And a pretty little toy to help keep the Soldier in line.”

 

Ward scrolled through the document on the phone's screen. His brows slowly rose as he read the doctor's report.

 

“This may actually work,” he murmured. Doctor Radcliffe grinned at the three men behind Ward but quickly looked away when one growled low in response. Ward scanned the document once more, then handed the phone back to Radcliffe. “Have you people come collect her. And make sure she's secure. If she gets loose in your lab, I'll just gas the whole wing.”

 

* * *

 

 

When Xandria came back to herself, everything was white. And nothing hurt. Her mind scrambled to bridge the gap between her memories. She remembered the prick of a needle but nothing else.

 

“Ah, she wakes!” A smiling face appeared in the white field of Xandria's vision. “How are you, my dear?”

 

Xandria experimented with moving her jaw. To her surprise, it worked.

 

“How...long...was I...out?” Her tongue felt thick in her mouth. The man tsked and vanished only to reappear a moment later with a glass of water. He guided a straw to her mouth. Xandria hesitated. But the temptation of water won out over her fear of poison. It helped to know that Hydra had better ways to kill her if that was their plan.

 

“Almost a week. It's lucky the team found you when they did. Another round of Hydra's interrogation techniques and I don't think you'd be here now.”

 

“Team?” Xandria muttered around the straw. The man nodded. He took the water away and set it aside.

 

“The Avengers, of course. All of them. It seems taking one of their own was a quick way to bring the team back together.” The man chuckled and shook his head.

 

“Back together?” Xandria frowned. It didn't sound right but she couldn't figure out why.

 

“Captain Rogers led the charge, or so I'm told. I'm just the new guy. Nobody tells me anything, so everything I pick up is just gossip.”

 

“Cap... Steve? Steve's back?” Xandria tried to sit up.

 

The man shushed her and braced her back against the bed by her shoulders.

 

“Easy, Miss Miracle. You're not ready to get up yet. Those monsters...you need your rest.”

 

“Listen to him, Xandria. Please?”

 

“Wanda?” Xandria twisted toward the sound of her friend's voice. Wanda hurried forward when she saw the tears in Xandria's eyes.

 

“It's okay. It's all okay. You're home now. We're all home.” Wanda gave the doctor a tight smile, then took his place on the edge of Xandria's bed as he gave them space.

  
“All? Even... even Bucky?” Xandria winced at the sound of his name. Her friends – her family – should be enough, she knew. But she wanted Bucky. Everything in her ached for him. She needed him. Now more than ever.

 

Tears rolled down Xandria's cheeks when Wanda nodded.

 

“Steve led the charge, officially. But Bucky was the first one through the doors. He... he found you. Cut you down. Brought you home.” Wanda swallowed back her own tears and took Xandria's hand in her own.

 

Xandria tried to reach for her friend's mind but felt only static. Wanda's smile softened.

 

“The medical team suppressed your powers until you're done healing. You were so... they weren't sure you'd make it. And your control was... it was rough.”

 

Xandria nodded and turned her hand over in Wanda's. Their fingers laced together and, for just a moment, Xandria felt herself relax. It was a distant sensation, almost foreign. But she welcomed it.

 

“Can I... does he...”

 

“He's right outside. He's been asleep in the hall since they brought you home.”

 

Xandria whimpered and it was all the plea Wanda needed. She squeezed Xandria's hand and flicked her eyes toward the door. It opened a moment later. Xandria closed her eyes as the familiar, heavy tread came closer.

 

“She wanted to see you,” Wanda murmured. Xandria tried to swallow another whimper but it stole past her lips.

 

Wanda's hand vanished from Xandria's. Thicker, rougher fingers took their place.

 

“Xan? Doll?”

 

Xandria shook her head and whimpered again.

 

“I know...Coulson told us about the... the Framework. About what they made you see,” Bucky murmured. “But I promise you. This is real. I'm real. And I'm not going anywhere.”

 

Xandria slowly forced her eyes open. Bucky stared down at her, dark circles under his eyes and a frown on his lips.

 

“Stay?” Xandria whispered. She was supposed to be angry. She was supposed to tell him she could make it without him. But she reached for him instead, hands trembling. “Please stay?”

 

“As long as you want, doll.”

 

Bucky climbed up onto the bed and pulled Xandria against his chest. A machine beeped in protest but they ignored it. They ignored the doctor's cries for Bucky to let Xandria rest. They ignored the doctor storming from the room in search of someone to “talk sense” into them.

 

Xandria didn't want to rest. She didn't want to be alone. Not anymore. She wanted to be in Bucky's arms. To feel safe and warm and for things to finally feel _right_.

 

And it did. It felt good and perfect and _whole_. Until Bucky's mouth found hers. He tasted right, he smelled right. But he didn't smile as he pressed his lips to hers. And the longer he kissed her, the more wrong it felt.

 

“Bucky.” Xandria drew back but Bucky followed. Xandria had to brace both hands on his chest to hold him still. “Bucky, will you do something for me?”

 

“Anything, doll.”

 

“Will you... will you smile?”

 

Bucky's brow furrowed.

 

“Smile?”

 

“Please? I know it's weird to ask but I...I just need to know.”

 

Bucky chuckled and shook his head.

 

“Alright, doll. How's this?” Bucky arched a brow as he smiled. And Xandria knew why everything felt wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	26. Smile

Another week passed. Coulson checked in with the team every day but his message was always the same: no leads yet. Bucky withdrew a little more every day until he barely seemed to be in the room when the team gathered to watch the Accords summit.

 

“First person to spot an Avenger buys dinner?” Pietro muttered. Sam managed a small smirk. Steve only braced his elbows on his knees and leaned toward the TV. Wanda curled into herself a little more. And Bucky, seated on the floor by Steve's feet, didn't move.

 

“Representatives won't officially sign the Accords until this evening,” the reporter announced. “But crowds of people – both in support of and protesting against the Accords – have already gathered in front of the UN embassy.”

 

The reporter glanced over her shoulder as a fleet of sleek cars pulled into the reserved driveway of the building behind her.

 

“I'm told that the Wakandan delegation has just arrived. King T'Chaka is, of course, slated to be among the first speakers once proceedings get underway.”

 

The team's SHIELD-issued phone buzzed against the coffee table. Bucky's eyes snapped toward it but Sam was the first to pick it up.

 

“You're on speaker, Coulson. We're watching the signing of the Accords.”

 

“Hope you've got DVR because you're going to miss it.”

 

For a moment nobody spoke. He could have meant any number of things. Ross was at their door, Hydra was closing in. But hope made them afraid to ask.

 

“Stunned silence. Not what I was expecting,” Coulson pressed on after a moment. “We have a lead on Xandria's location. I'm only about eighty-five percent confident we've got the right place. That said -”

 

“Where?” Bucky was on his feet before he'd finished the word.

 

“The exact coordinates should be on your phone already. Generally speaking, eastern France. But there's a catch,” Coulson sighed. “Between the Accords and various refugees already trying to relocate, SHIELD's resources are stretched pretty thin. I _can_ reassign some agents to meet you in France but they can't make it there until tomorrow.”

 

“Tomorrow is too late.” Bucky glanced around the room. Every face echoed his own determination. “We're going in to get her and we're going right now.”

 

“Everyone, go suit up.” Steve rose from the couch and took the phone when Sam offered it. He switched off the speakerphone as the team filed down the hall. When the last member was out of sight, he dropped his voice. “Should we be preparing for a rescue or a recovery?”

 

“Honestly, Cap? I wish I knew.” Coulson's answer was nearly as quiet as Steve's question. “I remember when Wesson joined us. She seemed like a good kid. But the new head of Hydra... he used to be one of ours. Well, sort of.”

 

“One of the double agents,” Steve growled. Coulson hummed in confirmation.

 

“One of my team, specifically. Grant Ward.”

 

Steve swore under his breath.

 

“Obviously his reputation precedes him,” Coulson muttered.

 

“That's not a good thing. Barton told me a few stories,” Steve scowled. “If Ward is involved, there's a very real chance we're not going to like what we find.”

 

Wanda appeared at the mouth of the hall, Steve's uniform in one hand. Steve nodded toward the couch and she tossed the uniform onto the cushions before vanishing back down the hall.

 

“Do you need transport?” Coulson asked.

 

“No, we've still got the jet the Maximoffs flew in on.”

 

“Always good to have a jet that Secretary Ross can't track.”

 

“Don't I know it.” Steve sighed and shook his head. “Do you want an update when we... If we… Do you want a post-mission brief?”

 

Silence filled the line for a moment.

 

“Let me know when you bring her home,” Coulson finally murmured. “She's one of ours. And SHIELD will honor that, whatever you find.”

 

* * *

 

“She won't know the difference. Isn't that what you told me, doctor?” Ward's jaw worked as he struggled to maintain his calm.

 

“How was I supposed to know she's bloody Sherlock Holmes?” Doctor Radcliffe threw his hands in the air. “The serum should have caused intense confusion. And it did! We got her further into the simulation than we had before. If I could just get a little more time -”

 

“Time's up, doctor. Today we move to Phase Four. What we can _salvage_ of it, at any rate.” Ward forced himself to relax when he felt his teeth grind together. It was all falling apart.

 

“Salvage, sir?” One of Ward's lieutenants stepped forward.

 

“I’ve been giving it some thought and we can still make something of Phase Four. Without the mutant's methods, we have little to no chance of retrieving the Soldier. The Fist of Hydra. Which means we change our plans. The next best thing to controlling the Soldier is to destroy him. If we destroy the Soldier, it will destroy Rogers. Destroy Rogers, destroy the Avengers. SHIELD will follow. Then there will be nothing in our way.” Ward said all of it calmly as if he were reading off the directions on a box dinner.

 

Agents rushed in and out of the lab as they removed the last pieces of vital equipment. None of them looked at the concrete slab in the corner. Or the woman chained down against its surface. Only Ward and Radcliffe seemed to acknowledge she existed at all.

 

“We can't fight the Winter Soldier. Especially not when he sees _her_.” Doctor Radcliffe nodded toward the slab in the corner. Ward smiled.

 

“I'm aware, doctor.” Ward's eyes ran from Xandria to the last of the serum on the counter. “Leave that.”

 

An agent froze, her hands already around the vials.

 

“Sir?”

 

“Leave that. And bring me a full dose of Inhuman stimulant.”

 

“What are -” Doctor Radcliffe's eyes widened as understanding dawned. “You can't give her _both_! You're going to kill her -”

 

“Or set a berserk fighter loose against her own team,” Ward cut in. He moved to Xandria's bedside. “She saved Bucky Barnes. She can help destroy him.”

 

* * *

 

Xandria floated. There was no up, no down. No sight or sound. Nothing stretched out around her in an endless void. She was sure she'd float in the nothingness forever. But the prick of a needle pulled her back into the nest of confusion her mind and body had become.

 

She braced herself, though she did not know how. All she could sense was nothing. But somehow she knew to expect the fire that ripped along every vein and nerve. It was all she could do not to scream. Or maybe she did scream. It was hard to tell one pain from another any more.

 

Just as she knew the fire would come, she knew it would end. But this time was different. The fire began to wane only as something like raw lightning flooded into the void.

 

This time she felt it when she screamed. She felt the force of it leave her throat as the lightning consumed her every cell. It erupted from her skin and obliterated the Nothing that had held her for so long.

 

* * *

 

 

Bucky took point. Nobody dared argue. Even Pietro remained behind with the group until Bucky signaled him around the perimeter.

 

“There's nobody here.” Pietro scowled as he delivered his report.

 

“Run it again. Look for traps, alarms, and sentries.” Bucky shifted his weight from one foot to the other as Pietro took off again.

 

Wanda glanced at Bucky, then flicked her gaze to Steve. It took the Captain a moment to lower his shields and he made a point of keeping his gaze on the surrounding trees when he did.

 

_Barnes is terrified. You have to be ready to -_

 

_He'll handle it. Whatever it is._

 

Steve pulled his shielding back in place. But he moved a little closer to Bucky when Pietro reappeared.

 

“The entire place is empty. Most of the doors are wide open, windows blown out. It's like they evacuated and trashed the place for good measure.”

 

Bucky's jaw clenched. He motioned Pietro back into formation, then led the team toward the nearest door. He hesitated for a moment as he swept the area. Sam spun to cover the team's back as they filtered into the deserted base.

 

They moved through it room by room, floor by floor. There was nothing but empty offices and destroyed equipment.

 

“Looks like they left in a hurry,” Pietro muttered.

 

“They do this.” Bucky didn't even turn as he answered. “They move on to some new mission and abandon small bases. It's never a clean break, though.”

 

“That doesn't sound good,” Sam tossed over his shoulder.

 

“It's not. They always leave a trap -”

 

A wall of livid purple energy slammed into Bucky. It threw him clear across the room and through the wall into the next office over. The scarlet of Wanda's energy burst into life around the team as another wave of reddish-purple washed over them. Even with Wanda’s protection, the team felt the anger thrumming through the wash of purple energy.

 

Bucky staggered back through the hole he'd left in the wall. He fired into the roiling mass of orchid-hued chaos, A scream of rage answered, even as he heard his shots ricochet off things too hard to be living tissue.

 

“ **Leave me alone!** ” The shriek seemed barely human.

 

It was hard to see through the haze of power but Bucky didn't need to see. He’d know that voice anywhere. It still spoke to him in his dreams. He dropped his gun and staggered through the energy field, squinting for any sign of the source. Scarlet cut through the air and sealed him behind Wanda's shield.

 

“Xandria!”Bucky sprinted to the boundary of Wanda's protection. He pounded against it, eyes wide and frantic. “Xandria, baby, stop. Stop, it's us! It's me!” Bucky rounded on Wanda when her energy shield held strong. “Let me out!”

 

“She'll kill you.” Wanda grimaced, her eyes closed as she held her shield with one hand and reached the remainder of her focus through the chaos. “I can feel her but it's... it's all wrong.”

 

“She needs me!” Bucky launched himself at the barrier once more. Pietro flashed into his path and sent the larger man sprawling.

 

“Just give Wanda a minute. If something is wrong with Xandria's mind, Wanda might be able to help.”

 

“ **I** can help her!” Bucky barked. “I... I _need_ to help her.” The anger fled his face as he looked past Pietro to the vague outline Xandria made through the layers of energy. Raw guilt twisted his features. “I left her and they -”

 

“She's hurt,” Wanda groaned. “But I can't... I don't... oh god.” Wanda jerked as a dry heave shuddered through her. “They... they mutated her. They _mutated her mutation_.”

 

“How?” Steve all but spat the word out, his eyes wide. Wanda looked up at him.

 

“I don't know. I didn't even think – we need to get her home. To Xavier or SHIELD or something. But....but she's dying. If we don't get her home, get her help...”

 

“Let me _OUT!_ ” Bucky threw himself at the barrier and this time Wanda couldn't hold it. Her power fractured and shattered, red sparks falling like ruby snow. Xandria's energy flooded in. Pain and fear suffocated them all until everyone hit their knees. Everyone but Bucky.

 

Bucky didn't even stumble as Xandria's power washed over him. It clawed at him, only to slide off as it found familiar barriers protecting his mind.

 

“ _STOP!_ ” Xandria staggered through the room, her power swirling around her in a vicious cyclone.

 

“Babydoll... Xandria... darlin..” The names fell from Bucky's lips as he felt her mind grate against his. He opened to her but she wouldn't bridge their minds. Every time she seemed close, fresh pain and fear flooded the room and her mind would dart away again.

 

He finally got close enough to see her face. And he understood why she wouldn't bridge their minds. Xandria's eyes were wide, her pupils blown. Whatever she was seeing, it wasn't the world in front of her.

 

“Enough... enough _lies_!” Xandria staggered as her words hitched on a sob.

 

“I'm sorry, darlin.” Bucky reached for her but Xandria lurched away from him. “I never meant to lie. I was protecting you. Trying to... I'm so sorry.” Tears pricked Bucky's eyes and he blinked them back.

 

The rest of the team moved behind him but Bucky motioned for them to fall back. There was nothing they could do, short of shooting her. And he couldn't – **wouldn't** – let that happen.

 

“Babydoll, please...”

 

Xandria slowly turned toward him. Bucky held her gaze as her brows slowly drew together. It took longer for her eyes to focus. A riptide of anger lashed the room when she finally made sense of Bucky's face.

 

“You....you... are a...a lie,” she hissed. “Another lie. And another and another and another.” A hysterical laugh bubbled up her throat, only to die on a sob. “I just...want to go home. To my family. To _my_ Bucky!”

 

Xandria's fingers tightened into a fist. Tendrils of her power wrapped around a filing cabinet and she sent it hurtling across the room with a sweep of her hand. Bucky dove out of its path and rolled to his feet as the cabinet crumpled against the far wall into an unrecognizable mass of shrapnel.

 

“I _am_ your Bucky, darlin.” Bucky held out his hand and inched closer. “I only left to protect you. Thought they'd follow me, not you. But I was wrong. I was so wrong.” Bucky let his tears fall this time. “And I'm sorry. I will be sorry for the rest of my life. But I'm... I'm still your Bucky. Always gonna be your Bucky, babydoll. I promised you that and I meant it.”

 

Bucky took a step toward her and Xandria flinched. Her fingers twitched and Bucky tensed. But no new tendrils appeared.

 

 _She's breaking down, Sergeant. We need to get her out of here and fast_. Wanda's voice whispered through his mind.

 

_Can you put her under?_

 

_If I can get close. Pietro can bring me close enough in a blink. But she's so volatile –_

 

_Tell your brother to be ready. Her power.... it doesn't hurt, but I don't know if that'll hold when I lay hands on her._

 

Bucky took another step forward.

 

“I've seen you before,” Xandria muttered. She glanced around as if searching for something before her gaze found Bucky again. “Over and over. So many times. Never … never right. Never my Bucky.”

 

She whimpered as Bucky moved closer, swaying on her feet as if exhausted.

 

“This time it _is_ your Bucky. I swear.”

 

“Then smile for me.” All the dazed confusion drained from Xandria's voice until only a furious hiss remained. She raised her hands, more sangria energy swirling between her fingers. Her command more than her fury stopped Bucky's approach.

 

“What?”

 

“Smile for me, Bucky. That's what they could never get right, could never fake. Your smile. The one just for me.” Her voice softened on her final words but the power around her fingers was as bright as ever. A twitch of her finger sent a lash of energy his direction. Bucky ducked behind the shield of his arm and hissed as the energy sent pricks of pain through the arm's sensors.

 

“The one just for you?” Bucky didn't understand most of what she said. God only knew what tricks Hydra had in their arsenal now. What those tricks had done to Xandria's mind. But he knew the smile she meant. “You mean the one I give you with your tea in the morning?”

 

Xandria's fingers stilled. Tears gathered in her eyes, though she didn't seem to notice. Not even when they broke free and slid down her cheeks. Bucky lowered his arm and reached for her.

 

“The one I give you at night when I'm reading to you?” The memories played liked films in his head, a gift of Xandria's presence in his mind for so long. “That smile, babydoll?”

 

Bucky slowly wrapped a hand around each of Xandria's wrists. Energy pricked at his skin, each jolt burning just a little hotter than the last.

 

“This smile?” Bucky murmured. Xandria slowly dragged her eyes away from his fingers around her wrists and up to his eyes.

 

Bucky pulled Xandria against his chest as he forced a tender smile past his own fear and the clinging tendrils of Xandria's emotional overflow. Her energy burned like a flame against his body before every trace of it went cold. Xandria's eyes widened, her gaze locked to his face.

 

“Bucky?” The word was little more than a whisper.

 

“Yeah, baby.” Bucky's voice caught and he swallowed down the lump in his throat. “It's me.”

 

His thumbs brushed over the delicate bones of her wrists.

 

“It's _us_. We're going to take you home.”

 

_Now!_

 

Wanda and Pietro appeared behind Xandria. Wanda's eyes found Bucky's for just a moment before she sank both her hands into the gnarled mess of Xandria's hair. Even Bucky felt the pull of her power. But he pushed against it as Wanda forced Xandria down into a deep slumber.

 

The haze of Xandria's energy vanished as suddenly as it had appeared. Her eyes rolled back as the tension drained from her muscle. She went limp in Bucky's grasp and he scooped her into his arms. Her head still fit perfectly into the hollow of his shoulder as he curled his body around hers.

 

“We need to get her to a doctor, _now_.”

 

Wanda's voice rang hollow in Bucky's ears. Xandria's heartbeat was so close and so unstable that he could hardly hear anything else. Every missed beat – every racing double count followed by sudden silence – dug a pit through his stomach.

 

“Do we have access to Xavier?” Steve asked. Wanda shook her head and Steve swore.

 

“We'll call Coulson from the air. He'll have the resources.” Sam motioned toward the door.

 

The team moved as one, Wanda and Pietro covering their exit while Sam and Steve took point. Bucky set the pace from the center as Xandria shivered in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	27. Homecoming

Nothing. There had been light and sound. And Bucky. _Her_ Bucky. She was sure of this time. And then the Nothing swallowed her down again.

 

Xandria snarled, for all that there was no sound. But she didn't need sound. She had her rage.

 

Her senses fought against the Nothing. Tendrils of fury dug in and tore, sharper than any claws. Pain trickled in around the wounds but it wasn't hers. For the first time in so long, the pain wasn't hers. So Xandria dug in deeper.

 

Even as part of her tore at the Nothing that held her captive, small slivers of her mind drew away from the violence, from the pain. They hid beneath the few traces of Bucky she had held onto when the world blinked out again.

 

His hands on her wrists, fingers gentle even when he pulled her close. The sadness and fear in his eyes when Xandria had finally been able to find them in the chaos of his face. And his smile. His perfect, perfect smile. Just for her. The only thing that had made sense as her mind splintered under fear and pain she still didn't understand.

 

But Bucky would understand. She just had to get back to him. Whatever it took.

 

* * *

 

Wanda's cries echoed off every surface of the jet. Steve flinched and pushed the jet to go just a little bit faster.

 

_Fighting me... so strong..._

 

Wanda's thoughts rolled freely through the cabin. Words were impossible as she set her jaw and gritted her teeth. One hand still cradled Xandria's head but the other moved in quick flicks and deft twists as Wanda wove her power in and around Xandria's.

 

“Is she stabilizing?” Bucky whispered. He pulled Xandria tighter against his chest when Wanda shook her head.

 

_Furious...terrified...dying. Need... need help. NOW!_

 

“We're close, Wanda. Three minutes, max.” Steve pushed the engines until they whined in protest.  
“SHIELD's guiding us in. Coulson's got a team waiting. Just...just hang on.”

 

* * *

 

The Nothing shivered, she was sure of it. It was enough to draw every splinter of Xandria's mind into the battle for her freedom. She dug in and launched herself into the thickness of the veil.

 

A flicker, that was all. Xandria caught a flicker of a mind that was not her own. It was whole and strong and _scared_. Her senses flicked against the fear and skittered away, the taste of it too familiar. She knew the mind holding her captive. The mind whose pain still lingered in her senses.

 

 _Wanda_ , a small fragment of her mind whispered.

 

But as suddenly as she conjured the name, it was gone. Confusion spilled into the space it left behind. And as the confusion twisted into rage, the Nothing shivered again.

 

* * *

 

The jet's roar doubled as Steve piloted them down into the hangar.

 

“The medical team's in position, Cap.” Coulson's voice came over the radio. He waved at them from the other end of the hangar.

 

Steve nodded, not trusting the radio to catch his voice as he lowered the ramp and flooded the cabin with the roar of the jet's engines.

 

Bucky and Pietro dashed from the jet even as the ramp whined to a stop. Wanda shook against her brother's chest but Pietro waved the medics off.

 

“Help Xandria. Wanda will be fine if you stop whatever Xandria is doing.”

 

“Give them to us.” A medic nodded toward the gurney as it rattled to a stop beside Bucky.

 

Bucky hesitated and his grip on Xandria squeezed a little tighter.

 

“Buck, let her go.” Steve appeared at his side. “Let them take her or you're gonna lose her.”

 

Bucky flinched. Steve's words finally spurred him into motion. He settled Xandria on the stark white sheet as Pietro nestled Wanda beside her.

 

Medics crowded around the gurney and raced for the exit. Bucky watched them go, his hands limp at his sides. He didn't even hear Natasha's approach until her pistol clicked an inch from his ear.

 

“Where was she?”

 

“Nat?” Steve edged closer, his voice heavy with warning and confusion.

 

“Where did you find her, Bucky?”

 

“Eastern France,” Bucky mumbled. He glanced at Natasha out of the corner of his eye, every other muscle perfectly still. “You know I didn't do that to her. I would never.”

 

Natasha ignored him.

 

“How long did the mission take?” This time she aimed her words at Steve, though her gun never wavered from Bucky's skull.

 

“Hours. I don't... the jet has a log. Coulson called us, we suited up, we extracted her, we came here.”

 

“You have proof?”

 

“Why do we... Nat, what's going on?”

 

“ **Do you have proof?** ” Natasha clenched her jaw.

 

“Yes, we have proof!” Steve rocked forward a step but dropped back at the look in Natasha's eyes. “What the hell is going on?”

 

Natasha stared at Steve, her eyes drilling into his. Nobody moved. Not the team, not Coulson. Not the hangar techs. Stillness reigned until Natasha lowered her gun and the safety clicked back into place. She looked away as she holstered her weapon.

 

“The UN... someone bombed it. During the signing. And the world thinks it was Bucky.”

 

* * *

 

The medics burst into the trauma ward. People scattered to their posts, save those that stayed by the gurney and tried to separate the two women.

 

 _Don't._ Wanda's voice rang out in every mind around them as a medic tried to ease her hand from Xandria's hair. _She will...break. Needs...me. Me… me and Bucky._

 

Nobody moved. They looked at one another, mouths agape. One woman finally broke away from her terminal and moved to one with a link to the Director.

 

“Director Coulson?” Her voice shook. “The mut... Agent... Scarlet Witch says Miracle needs her and.... and the Soldier.”

 

 _To stabilize her mind._ Wanda pressed on. _When we do, you... slow her heart. Stabilize her vitals. Too much. She's... she's burning up._

 

The medic relayed the information. A sudden snap from her fingers had the others lurching into action. Trays of drugs were whisked away as the medics filled new syringes and ran for new vials.

 

In the hangar, Coulson let the medic's words play out through the overhead speaker. Bucky looked to Natasha for confirmation. He was out the door before she'd nodded more than once.

 

“How's he going to find her?” One of Coulson's agents murmured. “He's never been on-base before. Should we order an escort?”

 

“Wanda will guide him,” Pietro answered. The agent looked up, eyes wide, and Pietro shrugged. “My sister will guide him or Barnes will track Xandria. Either way, an escort would just be in his way.”

 

“I wouldn't want to be in his way right now,” Sam muttered. He handed Natasha a flash drive and his small nod confirmed the evidence it contained.

 

“Coulson, do you have a containment room ready? In case this goes sideways?” Steve glanced up.

 

“For Wesson or Barnes?” Coulson frowned faintly.

 

“Both.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	28. An Awful Kind of Triage

Bucky thundered down the hall, dropping weapons as he went. Someone would come for him when Xandria didn’t need him any more, he knew that. He didn’t want to give them a reason to open fire anywhere near the trauma ward.

 

 _Hurry, please_. Wanda’s pleading tones forced new power into Bucky’s stride as she guided him deeper into the base.

 

He dropped his last knife on the floor and turned the final corner. One last burst of speed launched him down the hall and into the trauma ward. The sound of his arrival was lost in the shouts of medics and the beeping of machines. Xandria lay flat on the gurney, Wanda now curled on another rolled right up tight to Xandria’s side. An empty chair waited for him opposite Wanda and Bucky dropped into it without a word.

 

Wanda still held one of Xandria’s hands. Bucky reached for the other hand and flinched when he found Xandria cold to the touch.

 

 _She’s never cold_. He looked up at Wanda. She didn’t even open her eyes.

 

 _She’s dying._ Even in his head, Wanda sounded bereft. _Do you remember when you broke your first wall? And I brought Xandria in to save you?_

 

Bucky nodded and, somehow, it was answer enough.

 

_Let me into your mind. Together we can bring her back to herself._ _Like she and I brought you back_ _. Whatever they gave her is burning her up, but she can stop it. We just have to help her._

 

Bucky dropped every defense he had. Wanda could slip past them, he knew that now. But he didn’t want her wasting the time.

 

_Take a breath, Sergeant. You’re going to need it._

 

Wanda’s mind wrapped around Bucky’s as he took a deep breath. He felt her hold on him squeeze tight.

 

And then the world disappeared

 

* * *

 

Bucky came back to himself in a wash of bright scarlet light.

 

 _Wanda_? He tried to form a body for himself, a thought form, as Xandria had taught him.

 

 _Don’t_. Wanda’s voice cut off Bucky’s attempt. _She’s more powerful now and incredibly fractured. If we want to put her back together, I need your energy._

 

_Like a psychic battery pack?_

 

_Exactly._

 

_Am I really the best choice? With my own damage…_

 

_Xandria gave you her wards. They still carry the strength she used to have. You’re the only one left carrying that signature. It might help us anchor her._

 

The scarlet energy surrounding Bucky flashed a few shades brighter and Bucky realized Wanda already had him anchored within her power. A moment later Wanda’s thought form snapped into existence.

 

Wanda began to walk, Bucky’s awareness hovering just above her shoulder as if he walked beside her.

 

“Do you remember when you brought your first wall down? The hell it unleashed in your mind?”

 

Bucky grimaced, or at least gave the impression of a grimace. It was enough of an answer for Wanda.

 

“Whatever else they did to her, they locked her mind up in something like that. I think it’s why she attacked us.”

 

_Can we pull her out?_

 

“I’m not sure.” Wanda pulled up short as she reached the edge of her protective bubble. “But she’s right there, just beyond my shelter.”

 

_Do we know what we’re walking into?_

 

Wanda shook her head.

 

“We knocked her loose, back on the base. I had her for a little while but she...she fought free.” Wanda frowned and swallowed hard. “This… construct, I guess you’d call it. It took her before I could get her back.” Her voice trailed off and Bucky nudged her gently.

 

_We’ll get her back._

 

“Yes. Yes we will.” Wanda squared her shoulders. Bucky felt her hold on him tighten. And then she pressed her hand to the wall of energy. It vanished without so much as a _pop_.

 

For a moment it seemed like the only thing waiting for them was brilliant, blinding light. Then something shifted in Xandria’s mind, a heavy grinding that felt like it nearly shook Bucky free of Wanda’s hold.

 

A room flickered into view around them. Everything – walls, floor, ceiling – looked slick to the touch and all of it was a bright, polished white. Except for the blood spatters. Those stood out starkly crimson and Bucky felt his stomach roll at the same moment Wanda’s did.

 

“It’s not going to get any easier.” A deep chuckle followed the words.

 

Bucky and Wanda turned toward the voice. But the owner wasn’t looking at them. The man stood shoulder-to-shoulder with two others, all three of them intent on something their broad frames blocked from view.

 

“I can see why the Soldier liked this one,” one of the men muttered to his companions. “She was so pretty.”

 

“Screams real pretty too,” the third man added.

 

“Fuck. You.”

 

Xandria’s voice pushed Bucky and Wanda into motion. They circled the men on either side, careful to keep their distance. But not one of the trio seemed to notice them.

 

_Is this a construct? Or a memory?_

 

“A memory.” Wanda swallowed, her disgust thick in the air. “They...oh god...”

 

Wanda’s hands flew to her mouth. Bucky balked against Wanda’s hold, rage nearly throwing him free. Xandria hung from the ceiling by her wrists, one shoulder twisted at an angle no healthy joint could withstand. One eye was swollen shut and blood dribbled from the corner of her mouth. Someone had broken her nose, more than once. Cuts and burns littered every limb and peppered her torso in sickening clusters.

 

 _Baby...no..._ _ **NO!**_ Bucky railed against Wanda’s control, scrabbled against it in his need to reach Xandria.

 

“Stop!” Wanda’s power surged. Bucky growled as he forced himself to relax back into Wanda’s hold.

 

Xandria raised her head as Wanda cried out. Confusion darkened the one eye that could still see.

 

“Wanda?” Her chains creaked as she shook her head. “Not this...not again.”

 

“Yes, again,” one of the men answered. Wanda rounded on him but the man only had eyes for Xandria. “And again and again until you tell us what we want to know. Just do that and we can put all this nastiness behind us. Might even be able to save that pretty eye of yours.”

 

Xandria spat her blood at the man’s feet and.

 

“Like I said. Fuck. You.”

 

The look on Xandria’s face sent a jolt through Wanda and into Bucky. Bucky could only stare. Even walking with Xandria through her worst nightmares, Bucky had never seen pure hatred on her face. He had no doubt that, had she been free, her abusers would be dead. Xandria, who still wept when she remembered the lives she took in Siberia, could have killed all three of her abusers without a second thought.

 

“We’ll bring the Soldier home either way. Don’t you think it’d be better for him to have his _doll_ here to welcome him?”

 

“We really don’t want to kill you, you know.” The man in the middle shook his head.

 

Bucky turned on them, their faces memorized in an instant. He would find them. And he would kill them. Slowly.

 

“You’re just so stubborn!” The man closest to Wanda peeled away and turned to rummage around on a tray against the first wall. He reappeared with a knife in one hand and a pair of pliers tucked into his pocket.

 

Xandria closed her eyes. Her body relaxed into the chains and Bucky had to swallow back a wretch when he realized she hadn’t even flinched at the change in her shoulder’s ungodly position. She was either in shock or too far gone to care. Neither was good. If her condition here had any effect on Xandria’s actual health, they had to act fast.

 

 _She can hear you!_ Bucky pressed hard against Wanda’s control. _Talk to her. Tell her we came to take her home!_

 

Wanda shook her head and moved closer, her hand still pressed tight to her mouth. She steadied herself with a deep breath.

 

“Xandria, _d_ _ragă_.”

 

“Go away.” For all her anger towards her abusers, Xandria’s voice faded to a whisper when she looked up at Wanda.

 

“No.” Wanda’s hand dropped from her mouth and reached for Xandria’s chin. The chains rattled overhead as Xandria jerked away, not even a faint hiss of pain escaping her lips.

 

Bucky’s alarm blasted through him and into Wanda. It took her a moment to understand and her eyes widened when she did.

 

“You can’t feel your arm, can you?” Wanda murmured.

 

“I can’t feel much any more. I...I think I’m dying.” A bitter laugh brought bubbles of blood to her lips. “And I think that’s okay.”

 

“No!” Wanda surged forward. This time Xandria couldn’t move away before Wanda’s hands cupped her face and tilted it up until their eyes met. “No, _dragă_. You can’t think like that.”

 

Bucky pressed as close to Xandria as he could, willing her to feel him too. Wanda’s power held him fast but still he tried to wrap himself around Xandria. Anything to let her know he was here, that he had come back for her.

 

 _I’m right here, baby. We’re gonna get you out of here. Gonna take you home, get you all patched up. Good as new._ Even without a body, Bucky could feel the pressure of guilt at the back of his throat. He flicked his attention up to the chains and Wanda’s eyes flashed up as well.

 

_Can you break those? Get her down?_

 

Wanda frowned as she sent tongues of her power dancing along the chain anchored in the ceiling.

 

“Your chains...they’re more than metal, Xan. I can’t get you down on my own.”

 

Wanda turned back to Xandria. Her head hung down again. Behind Wanda, the man with the knife moved closer.

 

“Xandria, I need you to look at me. Can you do that?” Wanda cradled Xandria’s chin one hand and smoothed back her hair with the other.

 

Xandria raised her head, her good eye half-open.

 

“Can’t you just leave me alone?” Her words were slurred.

 

The men laughed as if she had addressed them.

 

“Oh honey, we already told you we can’t do that. Director Ward was very clear on what he needs from you. We won’t stop until you tell us how you broke the Soldier’s conditioning.”

 

Xandria shook her head again. One of the men growled.

 

“You know he won’t let you die, right?” The man’s growl died as a wicked grin split his face. “They’ve got a few tricks up their sleeve to keep you around for a long, long time.”

 

Wanda turned on the man, her power already flashing to life around him. The man’s motions slowed, but did not stop.

 

“What does he mean?” Wanda looked back at Xandria, though her hand stayed out, her power webbed around the broadest of the men. Xandria only shrugged, even as the same grinding sensation shook the world around them.

 

“ _Dragă_ , listen to me. Do you -” Wanda cut off when Xandria sagged against her chains. A thin thread of Wanda’s power wove around Xandria’s head to help her cradle it until she looked at Wanda once more. “Do you remember when Bucky brought down the wall? Do you remember the way Hydra used his own memories against him?”

 

“Of course. So scared...” Xandria trailed off, a faint frown on her lips. Bucky ached to hold her, to lift her weight from the chains and carry her home. But all he could do was watch. Wanda drew from his anguish, his rage, and the bonds around Xandria’s abuser glowed hotter.

 

“This is just like that.” Wanda dropped her voice to a gentle murmur. “None of this is real. It was, once. But you survived. You survived because they did something else to you, something after this. Do you remember what it was?”

 

“After?” Xandria’s frown deepened. “There’s no...no after.”

 

“Yes, there is!” Wanda moved closer until she was all Xandria could see. The men froze completely when Xandria couldn’t find them, the memory interrupted. 

 

“No...” Xandria shook her head but Wanda held her still.

 

“Yes. They did something else after this, d _ragă_. Something that healed you but changed you, changed your powers. Then they let you loose, knowing we were coming for you. Do you remember?”

 

“My… powers...” Xandria shook her head against but this time Wanda let her.

 

“They’re stronger now. And so are you. I need you to remember that. I need you to remember how strong you are. Because I need – we _all_ need – you to come back to us.”

 

A thick wave of bitterness rolled over them. And for all it’s choking anger, it sent a wave of relief through both Bucky and Wanda. If they could feel Xandria’s emotions, it meant she was shaking herself free of the memory. 

 

_Come on baby, you can do it. I know you can!_

 

Wanda bit her lip for a moment then, slowly, let a trace of Bucky’s presence slip free of her grasp. Xandria jerked in her bonds.

 

“Bucky...” Xandria whimpered his name and Wanda stifled a gasp as Bucky threw himself against her control, reaching for Xandria without thinking. 

 

“He came back for you,” Wanda murmured. “He’s here with me. He helped me reach you. But you’re...you’re slipping away. I needed him to reach you but we couldn’t both come through like this.” Wanda waved at her solid form. Xandria slumped in her chains once more as her chains shook with faint, dry sobs. 

 

“That...that wasn’t a….a dream? Or...or whatever they’ve been d-doing to me?”

 

“No, _dragă._ The team, the base, Bucky. It was real. _**This**_ isn’t.” Wanda swept her hand toward the men behind her. “This is one of Hydra’s lies. You broke Bucky free of his. And I know you can break free of this one too.”

 

Xandria’s head tilted to one side. She grimaced and the grinding sensation rumbled to life around them.

 

_Go, baby...Go!_ Bucky cheered her on, for all that she couldn’t feel him. 

 

The slick walls around them cracked. Thick purple veins pulsed to life in the stark white stone. Xandria groaned and the purple flashed a darker, more livid color before the cracks spread wider.

 

“Keep going, _dragă._ You’re almost there!” 

 

The men behind Wanda began to flake away. Wanda dropped her hand and the man trapped inside the bonds of her power disintegrated into dust. 

 

“Wanda?” Xandria’s voice slurred. Her chains began to flake, but she sagged more fully against them even as they began to groan. “After...serum...that was after.”

 

The grinding grew louder.

 

“What serum?” Wand cupped Xandria’s face in both hands and shook gently. “D _ragă,_ what serum?”

 

“Like...like Steve...and Bucky.” Xandria tried to lift her head as the world around them slowly burned from white to purple. “And… Skye.”

 

“Sky?” Wanda’s brow furrowed but Bucky buzzed with sudden understanding. 

 

_Skye Johnson! She’s one of Coulson’s Inhumans. Whatever they did, it involved supersoldier serum and Inhumans._

 

Wanda’s relief spilled over until even Xandria seemed to feel it. 

 

“We’re going to fix this,” Wanda promised. 

 

Purple fire consumed what remained of the memory. Xandria faded from sight, but the sense of her swirled around them as she fought to regain control of her own mind. 

 

_Did we…_ Bucky trailed off, fear twisted around his words.

 

“We set her free. Now we let the medics do their job. If there’s anything they _can_ do.” 

 

Wanda’s form vanished. She pulled Bucky back toward his own mind, but not before he felt Xandria. The touch was faint but unmistakable. 

 

_Hold on, babydoll_ . Bucky wasn’t sure Xandria could hear him. But he had to try.  _Just hold on._

 

Bucky wanted to say more, to stay with her the way she had stayed with him so many times. But Wanda sent him tumbling back into his own mind before he could even try  to get free of her hold. 

 

_She’s still dangerous,_ Wanda cautioned. 

 

_She needs me!_

 

_Yes, she does. But not in her head, not yet._

 

Wanda’s presence vanished from Bucky’s mind and he was alone again. For a moment, the silence of his mind overwhelmed his senses. And then the world began to register once more. 

 

Someone pulled Xandria’s hand from his and Bucky’s eyes snapped open. He tensed, ready to fight. Steve held him still. 

 

“We need to give them room, Buck.” 

 

Steve nodded to the white-coated scientists now circling the terminals and workstations in the room. 

 

“They..they...” Bucky struggled to explain but Steve only nodded. 

 

“Wanda told us about the serum and...and Inhumans.” Steve pulled Bucky to his feet and pushed him toward the exit. Bucky dug his heels in but Steve still managed to get him out the door. 

 

“I can’t leave her, Steve. Not again, not now!” Bucky struggled against Steve’s grip but Steve held fast. 

 

“And you won’t!” Steve managed to get Bucky around a corner. Only then did he let go. “But they need space to work, not extra bodies in their way.”

 

Bucky glared but Steve shook his head.

 

“You know I’m right.”

 

Bucky fumed but said nothing. He hated it, but the Steve  _was_ right. Bucky had seen enough carnage and triage as the Soldier that the rhythm of it was all too familiar. Even if this carnage was grotesquely bloodless. 

 

“And there’s...there’s something else.” Steve glanced down the hall, then shook his head. “Nat’s been briefing us on the UN bombing. It doesn’t look good, Buck. They’ve got witnesses who talked to you. And they’ve got you on camera. It’s clear footage, too. If I hadn’t been with you in France, **I** would think it was you.”

 

“What…” Bucky trailed off as everything caught up with him. Natasha’s interrogation hadn’t mattered once Bucky had hit the trauma ward. Now it screeched to the front of his mind. He cursed under his breath, thoughts spinning as he switched focus. “How is that possible?”

 

“Our best guess is a Photostatic Veil, or a Nano Mask. It’s SHIELD tech. Natasha used one to bring down Pierce. We thought SHIELD still had possession of them all. Apparently we were wrong.”

 

Bucky scrubbed a hand over his face. 

 

“How...how do we fix this? All of this?” Bucky dropped his hands and slumped back against the wall. 

 

“I don’t know, Buck. But we will.” 

 

Steve clapped a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and gently pulled him away from the wall. He guided his friend down the hall toward the room where the rest of their team waited. Bucky went where Steve led him, but his mind bounced from the trauma ward to the UN and back. 

 

The two were connected, he was sure of that. Hydra took Xandria –  _hurt her –_ and then framed Bucky for the bombing. He didn’t know why. But then, it didn’t really matter. They’d hurt Xandria and used his name to hurt innocent people. And they’d regret it. Somebody would answer for the horror at the UN. And then they would die for what they’d done to his girl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	29. Doctors and Debriefings

They waited. Coulson set rooms aside for them, but they stayed in the waiting room all the same.

“It could be hours.” Coulson tried to reason with them. “And that’s if she wakes up today.”

“We’re staying here – staying together – until…until we know.” Steve had spoken for the team. Bucky had flinched and leaned back in his seat, eyes closed. The others had only nodded.

“Captain, we need to talk about -”

“After, Coulson. Please.”

Coulson had left them alone after that.

Sam and the twins managed to doze, but never for long. And never well. Steve tried to sleep, Bucky knew that from his breathing. But all Bucky could do was close his eyes and lean back, his arms crossed over his chest. He busied his mind with thoughts of after. Because there would be an after. There had to be. After Xandria was stable, after she was better. After Bucky had a chance to prove he wouldn’t leave her again.

His eyes snapped open when he felt a mind brushing against his. It took less than a second to recognize Wanda’s signature. He glanced at her, but her eyes were closed as she dozed against her brother’s shoulder. Bucky settled back against the wall as he welcomed her connection to his mind.

 _You’re projecting_. There was no mistaking the vague annoyance in Wanda’s thoughts. But it vanished as she went on. _I wouldn’t have intruded but… but don’t expect too much. She loves you, that hasn’t changed. But she’s...harder. And that was before Hydra took her._

Bucky’s fingers dug into his arm and a brief sense of calm washed from Wanda’s thoughts into his.

_I’m not saying she’ll hate you. I don’t think she ever could. But she might not be able to take you back. It might hurt too much._

_I don’t care._ Bucky clenched his jaw _. Whether or not she takes me back doesn’t change my mind. I’m not leaving her again._

Bucky cut the connection before Wanda could reply. He felt her annoyance flicker against his mind before Wanda suddenly shot up out of her chair. Bucky’s eyes flew open as he surged to his feet, hand going to the empty sheath on his thigh before he registered the approaching footsteps.

“The doctor is coming.”

Wanda’s words pulled the rest of the team from their seats. The doctor appeared in the door and rocked back a step when she found herself faced with five anxious Avengers. She covered the motion with a glance down at the tablet in her hand before she stepped back into the room.

“I’m Dr. Abara.” She shook Steve’s hand when he offered it, then looked at Wanda. “You’re Wanda Maximoff, the telepath. Right?”

Pietro tensed but Wanda nodded quickly. Dr. Abara smiled.

“I don’t know how you do what you do, but you saved Miss Wesson’s life. We would never have thought to check for serum in her bloodstream. Nobody has seen an active superserum in decades.”

“What about the, uh...” Pietro waved a hand for a moment before he remembered the word. “The Inhuman serum?”

Dr. Abara grimaced and consulted her tablet again.

“We had to call in the big guns for that one. Thankfully Coulson has Doctors Fitz and Simmons on his team. They had prior knowledge of Miss Wesson and intimate experience with Inhuman biology. Without their guidance, I don’t think we’d have been able to save her.”

“What happened?” Bucky’s fingers twitched with the need to snatch the tablet from the doctor’s hands. He shoved his hands into his pockets instead, all too aware of his reputation. To her credit, Dr. Abara met his eyes as easily as she met Wanda’s. Even if her heart rate did pick up. Bucky took a step back and tried again. “We know they dosed her and...and tortured her. But what did all of it do?”

“That’s… we’re still trying to figure that out.” Dr. Abara shook her head. “There are no signs of torture. That makes sense, given the supersoldier serum. The Inhuman serum was just unnecessary. So at the moment, your guess is as good as ours.”

“Something altered her mutations. They… they felt wrong.” Wanda grimaced and shook her head when the Doctor arched a brow. “It’s hard to explain when you can’t feel them. But everyone has a sort of mental signature. I knew Xandria’s inside and out. But when we found her… I wouldn’t have known her signature if I hadn’t been looking right at her.”

“Her energy was a different color too,” Sam added.

“Her energy?” The doctor’s brow rose higher. “Like her aura?”

“No,” Sam shook his head, then motioned to Wanda. “Wanda, show the doctor what your energy looks like, please?”

Wanda spun a web of energy between her fingers. Dr. Abara’s eyes widened as she stepped closer. It was Wanda’s turn to arch a brow as the woman looked at her hand from every angle before she stepped away again.

“I’ve seen footage of your missions. But seeing it in person… well that’s something else entirely.” Dr. Abara tapped at her tablet and typed something in before glancing up at Sam. “And this is what you meant by Miss Wesson’s energy? She can do the same thing?”

“Not exactly the same, but close enough.” Sam frowned for a moment. “Her energy used to be red, like Wanda’s. A different shade, but still red. When we found her, though, it was… purple. Like really dark wine or -”

“A bruise,” Bucky mumbled. “A deep one. It’s...they’re the same color.”

Dr. Abara took a few notes, nodding as Sam and Bucky explained.

“I’ll share this information with Doctors Fitz and Simmons. It might help them determine what the Inhuman serum was meant to do.”

The doctor gave the team a small nod and rushed from the room, her eyes still on her tablet. Silence reigned until another, more familiar figure appeared in the doorway.

“Guys,” Natasha nodded back toward the hall. “Coulson’s been patient. But it’s time.”

 

* * *

 

Wanda and Pietro stayed behind in case Dr. Abara came looking for them again. Steve, Sam, and Bucky followed Natasha deeper into the base. Bucky’s shoulders tensed a little more with every turn that took him further from Xandria.

“We’re going to figure this out, Buck,” Steve murmured. Bucky only shook his head.

Natasha led them into a meeting room and stepped aside to close the door behind them. Coulson sat the head of the table, a woman at his side.

“Gentlemen, I’m sorry to pull you in while Miss Wesson is still in recovery. But we need to get in front of the UN bombing.” Coulson nodded at the woman to his left. “This is Agent -”

“Melinda May,” Steve cut in. He moved around the table and extended his hand. “You visited us a year or so back, when Wesson joined the team. It’s good to see you again.”

Agent May hesitated, then stood up and shook Steve’s hand.

“Not the best circumstances,” she answered. Her voice was soft, but there was no mistaking the authority in it. “Wesson’s abduction and then the UN bombing. It’s a mess.”

“Any word on the UN investigation? Has Bucky’s name been cleared?”

“Yes and no. In that order.” Coulson sighed and pulled his phone from his pocket. A few taps on the device and a flick of his wrist had the display projected on the wall.

“Ross has had a field day. He’s done everything short of outright blaming Sergeant Barnes for ‘breaking up the team’.”

Steve crossed his arms over his chest as Bucky looked away.

“Natasha has the flight log from your jet as well as the information we gathered when you arrived on-base. She’s going to take it back to the team, but there’s no telling what they’ll do with it.”

“If I can prove that James was in France when his doppelganger was sighted at the UN, that’ll be enough for most of the team. Tony and Rhodey… I don’t know. They might need a little bit more. But nobody who knows Steve – who knows James – really thinks Steve would let this happen. Or that James is capable of something like this.”

“So what now?” Sam leaned against the other end of the table, his eyes scanning the information on the screen as it scrolled by. He frowned before anyone could answer and pointed up at the screen. “Hang on...about forty seconds back. Who is that?”

Coulson reversed the footage, then paused it. A man’s furious face filled the screen, the expression hardened by the debris and dark stains covering his jacket. Coulson looked down at his phone as everyone else looked up at the wall.

“King T’Challa of Wakanda, though he was Prince T’Challa prior to the UN tragedy. His father was giving a speech when the bomb went off. The late King T’Chaka was the first reported casualty.”

“The bombers murdered a king? That’s not going to go over well. Especially not when his son has that kind of look on his face.” Sam glanced at Steve, then sat back, worry etching lines on his face.

Coulson shook his head.

“Nobody has seen King T’Challa since he was released from the UN with the other survivors. He might have gone back to Wakanda, but my gut says he’s not the type to let someone else find his father’s killer.”

“And right now he thinks that’s me. Because that bastard wore my face when he… when they...” Bucky’s words faded into a growl. He stalked toward the door, then turned and stalked back. “The people who did this… they took Xandria too. It’s too big a coincidence otherwise.”

“We had the same thought,” Coulson motioned to Agent May and nodded. “And since you found Xandria on a defunct Hydra base, that means we’re looking for Grant Ward.”

Steve shook his head, jaw tense.

“It could have been anyone else. But no. It had to be Grant Ward.”

“Am I supposed to know that name?” Sam glanced from Steve to Bucky but Bucky’s return glance was just as confused.

“Grant Ward was one of SHIELD’s best. He was part of my team… my personal team.” Coulson cut himself short with a bitter smile. Steve took the opportunity to jump in.

“He was in the academy with Clint and his brother Barney. From what little Clint has shared, Ward was always a little off.”

“Too good at the mean stuff, too quick to take on cover work,” Natasha jumped in. “I met him a few times before SHIELD fell. He could’ve just been good at the work but something was just...”

“Off,” Agent May finished with a nod. “It was hard to see when he was right in front of you. And that’s what makes him so dangerous. He’s good at what he does. Including blending in.”

“So, I’ll ask again.” Sam stood up and motioned to the information on the wall. “What do we do now?”

Coulson glanced at May, then both rose from the table.

“Now we go digging. And we hope we find Ward before someone else finds us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	30. Home is Where the Heart Is

_Hold on babydoll. Just hold on._

 

Xandria wrapped the remnants of herself around Bucky’s words. They were the one thing that she knew she could trust as her mind struggled with everything Wanda had shown her. Everything Wanda’s questions had set free. Memories and thoughts that she couldn’t even be sure were her own. Sometimes she was almost sure she found something Hydra had planted inside her mind, when a thought was so obscene it made everything hurt. But then she remembered her anger at the men who tortured her. And she wasn’t so sure anymore.

 

But even then, Bucky’s words were her anchor. Once upon a time, before she was a scared, broken thing, she had been his babydoll. It hurt to think of it, think of the way they had been. They way they weren’t anymore. But even in the pain, the words helped. They brought back memories, things she had either tried to forget or that Hydra had forced down under whatever it was they tried to do. Memories of mornings in bed and evenings tangled together on the couch. Of their room – their _home._ The life they’d been building together.

 

Other memories surfaced too. They were darker but still Xandria knew they were true. They fit with the other memories. She’d remember telling Bucky a story from her childhood and then suddenly the memory of the event would surface. One scene at a time, she slowly reformed the chains of her memory. Just the way she had taught so many others to do. The way she had taught Bucky to do.

 

And, with each chain, she forged a small measure of control over the storm of power that had overrun her mind. The energy felt… off. Slick and almost oily. She wasn’t sure what her energy was supposed to feel like – her memories were still too broken for that – but she knew that it wasn’t supposed to be oily. Still, she learned to hold on. And the more energy she held, the more memories she could sort through. Over and again, on a loop. _Sort, chain, control_.

 

There was no sense of time in the mind. But still, Xandria knew it took her a long time to gather enough control. Too much time. But she couldn’t risk moving outside her own mind until she knew she wouldn’t unleash the oily power she contained. So she waited and she worked. And when she thought she had enough control, she gathered Bucky’s words even closer. They had lost their shape and most of their sound. But they still felt like Bucky. They felt like home. His energy still colored them. And she followed that energy up out of her mind and back toward her family.

 

* * *

 

Bucky jerked awake. His neck ached from the way he’d been slumped forward in his chair, but the pain faded before he’d really made note of it. Something else had his attention. He rose from his chair and frowned. Without knowing why he moved into the hall, careful not to nudge any of his sleeping teammates. The sensation grew stronger as he moved down the hall toward the recovery ward.

 

“Sir? Mister… Sergeant Barnes, you aren’t authorized -” The nurse cut off when Bucky brushed past him and kept going. He tried again when Bucky paused, frowning as he tried to follow the pressure behind his eyes. “Sergeant Barnes, you need an escort!”

 

Bucky almost turned back. But then the pressure shifted, twisted. And suddenly it was gloriously familiar.

 

 _Baby?!_ Bucky sprinted down the hall toward Xandria’s room

 

_Bucky?_

 

Her voice was faint, little more than a whisper. But it was _her_ voice. Xandria’s voice. Her real voice for the first time in so long. Not just the memory Bucky had carried with him since leaving her behind. Bucky choked back a relieved sob as he burst into Xandria’s room.

 

Xandria was sitting upright in her bed, her eyes wide as she stared around the room. She jumped when Bucky threw open her door but he had his arms around her before she could move. The machines blared in protest as Xandria’s heart rate dipped, then spiked. A faint pulse of purple static silenced them as Bucky dragged her closer.

 

Bucky opened his mouth to speak but nothing would come out. All the sweet names, all the promises. They tripped over each other in his head but none of them would reach his tongue. So he tried to find her mind with his. But the moment he made contact, her mind skittered away and the pressure behind his eyes began to fade.

 

 _No no no! Please, please don’t go!_ He buried his nose in her hair, hating that they had used the wrong products when they bathed her. She smelled _off_. But under that, she still smelled like his Xandria. Like his babydoll.

 

“Bucky… Bucky stop, please.”

 

Xandria’s words slid under Bucky’s ribs and lodged there. His hands twitched against her back in protest as he forced himself to ease the force of his embrace.

 

“Xandria, I...”

 

“Please?” Xandria braced her hands on his chest and pushed. Not hard, just a little. But Bucky still found himself on the other side of the room, his back against the wall beside the door.

 

 _I...I can’t. Not now. I’m sorry_.

 

It was all she sent him before he felt her mind draw away from his completely. He tried to reach for her but she shielded herself and looked away.

 

“Baby...”

 

Xandria only shook her head. She pulled the sensor pads from her temples and her chest without looking at him. It wasn’t until Wanda and Pietro appeared at her bedside that she raised her head. Wanda launched herself into Xandria’s arms. And Bucky had to look away as Xandria pulled the other woman close, her face buried against Wanda’s shoulder.

 

Pietro pulled both women into an embrace, murmuring softly in Sokovian. Xandria nodded along as if she understood every word. It was a moment before Bucky realized that she did. He had been gone long enough that she had learned a new language. Fluently. The full weight of the last six months hit Bucky like a blow to the chest. Wanda’s warning came back to him and he slipped from the room just as Sam and Steve arrived.

 

“Buck?” Steve reached for him but Bucky shook his head.

 

“Go...go say hi. She’s awake. She’ll… she’ll be happy to see you.”

 

Sam and Steve exchanged glances as Bucky leaned back against the wall. He jerked his head toward Xandria’s room one more time. Steve lingered a moment longer, until Sam pulled him into the room.

 

Wanda had warned him it could take time. She had warned him that Xandria might not take him back at all. But it had seemed impossible. Not his girl. Not his Xandria. Now the pain in her voice had been all too real. He had meant it when he told Wanda he wouldn’t leave her a second time. But, for the first time, Bucky realized that he might have lost Xandria. Really and truly lost her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	31. When Worlds Collide

Steve tried to insist that Xandria should rest. But Xandria was tired of the darkness. She was tired of being alone with only her own thoughts. So when Coulson arrived and hesitantly mentioned the need for a team briefing, Xandria jumped on the idea. She didn’t tell him – or anyone else – how loud their minds were. Their thoughts whispered to her, even through their shields. She would tell them soon, of course. She just couldn’t stand the thought of more silence. Not yet.

 

But Wanda knew in that way Wanda always knew. Xandria felt her friend’s disapproval as they took their seats at a large conference table. And she wasn’t surprised when Wanda’s shields came down around their minds. Or when she formed a bridge between their minds.

 

 _I just didn’t want to be alone._ Xandria her opened her thoughts to Wanda, letting her friend see her intentions.

 

 _You’re not alone, not anymore._ Wanda took Xandria’s hand under the table.

 

 _In my head_ , Xandria clarified. She gave Wanda’s fingers a gentle squeeze.

 

 _I know._ Wanda returned the squeeze as she wrapped Xandria in a wave of warmth and comfort. _I’m here. And so is Bucky_.

 

Xandria flinched. Wanda tightened her hold on Xandria’s hand.

 

_We need to talk about -_

 

“You know you can still back out, right?” Sam leaned in on Xandria’s other side, cutting Wanda off without realizing it. “Nobody is going to mind if this turned out to be too much.”

 

“I’m okay.” Xandria managed a small smile for Sam. “It’s just… it’s been too quiet. In here.” She touched the side of her head. Sam nodded, though she could see in his eyes that he didn’t understand, not really. But he was trying. And Xandria couldn’t help the wave of gratitude that flooded over her wards and broke against Wanda’s barriers.

 

Wanda glanced at Xandria, then let her barrier slip just enough for Sam to get a hint of what Xandria was feeling. Surprise lit through his eyes before he gave her a small nod and a smile. Avenger to Avenger – healer to healer – they both understood.

 

“Is everyone ready?” Coulson took his place at the head of the table. Sam gave Xandria a final smile and joined the rest of the team in facing Coulson. “There’s a lot to unpack here, so we’re going to chronologically as best we can, starting with the day Hydra took Miracle. Miss Wesson, if you could walk us through what you remember from that day?”

 

Xandria opened her mouth to talk and finally took a good look around the room. She closed her mouth with a slight frown and a glance toward Wanda.

 

“Where is the rest of the team?” She looked around the table when Wanda wouldn’t answer. “Where’s Tony?”

 

“We’ll get to that.” Coulson’s voice was a few shades gentler when he answered her. “That’s all part of the briefing, unfortunately.”

 

Panic shot through Xandria, sending purple tendrils writhing under her skin. Wanda’s hand tightened on hers as the other woman’s wards slammed down around Xandria’s mind. It took a moment for Xandria’s control to reign in her agitation and the telltale flickers of power flicking up and down her arms.

 

“They’re alive, doll.” Bucky’s hands tensed on the table as he resisted the urge to reach across and take Xandria’s free hand. “They’re alive and they’re okay. They’re just not here right now.”

 

Xandria stared at him. She pushed at Wanda’s control, gently, until the other woman let go enough that Xandria could brush her mind against Bucky’s. His eyes widened but he said nothing as he let her in and showed her the truth in his words. The way the team had fractured, the reasons Tony and the others weren’t there. He held back the rest, the things Coulson would want to cover. Xandria frowned when she realized he had filtered his thoughts, but she gave Bucky a small nod all the same.

 

“Thank you.”

 

Bucky gave her a soft smile and Xandria had to look away. His smile was right, just like she remembered. But it still hurt.

 

“The day I went missing, I was on a mission with the twins. We were sent to a border city in Latvia to try and take it back from some small terrorist cell that had taken it over. Ross wanted to see how we would hold up in combat without the heavy fighters taking the brunt of it.”

 

Bucky’s chair creaked as his hand tensed against the armrest. The rest of the team pretended not to notice.

 

“I don’t know if he has a different idea of high-combat than we did, but that place was a war zone.” Xandria grimaced and glanced back at the twins who nodded. “I’ve been in firefights. LA was maybe a week before and it wasn’t easy. But the Latvia mission… they nearly shot down our jet. If I were the conspiracy-theory type, I’d say they knew what to look for, knew how to spot us.”

 

“That’s something we’ll have to look into when the rest of this dust settles,” Coulson murmured. He made a note on the tablet in front of him, then motioned for Xandria to continue. She glanced at the twins one more time, took a deep breath, and went on.

 

“We were supposed to get into one building, get some information, and then get that information to local allies. Supposedly the intel would help them push back the terrorist forces. We weren’t told how that was supposed to work.” Xandria shook her head and frowned. “Looking back it doesn’t make sense. But -”

  
“But that’s a question for later,” Steve cut in. He leaned forward across the table and laid a hand over Xandria’s. “We’ll get the mission details when we link up with the rest of the team. But we need to figure out this mess first.”

 

Xandria’s frown deepened but she nodded and went on.

 

“We made it to the target building and took a breather for maybe a minute. At that point we heard footsteps upstairs. We needed the intel, that was the mission priority. So I sent the twins to get it while I held off whoever else was in the building.”

 

“You were the mission lead?” Coulson paused in the notes he was taking. Xandria shook her head.

 

“Not really. Natasha was supposed to be our remote mission commander but we had lost radio contact with her. At that point, we were just running of general consensus. It made sense for the twins to get the intel since they are more practiced at moving quickly as a unit. That left me to hold the line and give them whatever time they needed.”

 

“Still, going into a group of hostiles alone?” Sam shook his head. “That’s never a smart tactic.”

 

“I know. But I didn’t sense many minds or hear all that many footsteps. There weren’t that many people and if I took them out, I could make sure the floor stayed clear. If I waited for them to come to us, we might have been stuck in a corner.”

 

Sam’s frown didn’t budge but his only answer was to shake his head. Xandria felt Bucky’s eyes on her, could feel the irritation rolling off his mind. She kept her eyes on Coulson.

 

“We entered the building on the ground floor. The intel was stored on computers in the basement – one floor down from us - and the intruders were one floor up, on the top floor. Once the twins took off, I went upstairs. Wanda and I were still mentally linked. But the further away we get, the weaker it gets. So rather than rely on my mutations, which were still weak fr-” Xandria stumbled, then paused.

 

Bucky’s mind tripped into a carousel of guilt and Xandria tucked herself more fully into Wanda’s wards.

 

“Rather than rely on my mutations, I drew the pistol I carried at the time. Two terrorists were to the left of the stairwell opening, and I shot them. There was nothing else to that side of the hall, so I moved toward the only other sounds I could hear, off to the right.”

 

This time, when Xandria paused, she glanced at Bucky. Their gazes held for just a moment before she had to look back at Coulson.

 

“The rest of the insurgents were dead. Someone had killed them – just finished killing them. I thought… he looked...” She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and forced the words out. “He looked like Bucky. Sounded like him. Talked like him. I thought he...I… he...” The words tangled over themselves and stuck in her throat.

 

“You thought I’d come back for you.” Bucky’s words were quiet but they rang into the silent room. Xandria nodded, careful not to look at him when she opened her eyes.

 

“I tried to connect with his mind but I couldn’t. It was like… it was like there was nothing there. Just static. And then he… I felt a sting in my neck, a needle. Less than a minute later I was on the floor. I...I don’t remember much after that. Not for a while.” Xandria couldn’t tell them about the man’s smile. How it was all wrong. That Bucky – _her_ Bucky – would never have smiled at her like that.

 

“Knowing Ward, he went and got you himself. Hydra wants the Soldier back and they must have felt you were the key to that,” Coulson murmured.

 

“That’s what they asked me when they… when I was with them.” Xandria clenched her free hand before hiding it beneath the table. “They wanted to know how I broke his conditioning. I didn’t tell them anything.”

 

“Nothing?” Steve glanced at Coulson, then back at Xandria. “They had you for nearly a week. We know they -” Steve cut off, careful not to glance at Bucky or stare too long at Xandria.

 

The tension in the room pulled tight. Xandria felt it against her senses like a hand pressed over her mouth. It sent a bolt of anxiety across her shoulders, pulling them in tight. The pain of it pushed Xandria past when she could handle.

 

“Torture, Steve.” Xandria sighed as the word seemed to rip the invisible hand from her mouth.

 

Her shoulders slumped as she pulled her hand free of Wanda’s. Xandria scrubbed both hands over her face for a moment. When she looked up at Steve again, exhaustion had settled on her features.

 

“They tortured me. And, no, they didn’t get what they were looking for. Not from me.”

 

“Not many people can say that,” Coulson cut in. “Ward’s methods are very persuasive. I’m impressed.”

 

“If I told them, they’d go after Bucky. Ward told me as much. So I kept my mouth shut.” Xandria shook her head. “I know they did other things, gave me things. But those are the parts I don’t remember so clearly.”

 

Questions swirled in Bucky’s mind. They tugged at Xandria’s attention but she drew in on herself until she couldn’t feel them anymore. She would have to answer him, eventually. And she had questions of her own. But now was not the time.

 

“I think we can be of some help with that.” Coulson finalized the notes on his tablet and stood. He flicked his tablet toward the wall behind him. Almost immediately the wall flared to life. It bore a massive display that stretched across the width of the room. Most of the information made little sense to Xandria, the charts and formulas foreign languages she did not understand. But the few static images on the screen were familiar enough.

 

“Superserum?” She frowned, eyes searching the images as if they would yield more answers. And, as her mind slowly spun through the memories she hadn’t yet sorted out, the answers came. “I...I remember, I think. Some of it. They dosed me with serum, didn’t they?”

 

“That’s what you told us,” Wanda murmured. “Don’t you remember?”

 

“Not clearly, no.” Xandria shook her head. Her eyes lost their focus as her attention turned toward the mess that still lurked in her mind. “I remember you coming into my nightmare. The white room. And I remember -” She cut off abruptly, a pink flush rising in her cheeks.

 

 _I remember being his babydoll_. The words were clear enough in Xandria’s mind. And she knew Wanda could sense them. But they were too much to share so openly. Understanding flowed from Wanda’s mind and Xandria blinked back the prick of tears as Wanda offered an explanation for the others.

 

“If she doesn’t remember everything, she must have fractured after we pulled her from the mental construct Hydra had locked her in. Piecing herself back together so she remembers everything will take time. Having gaps makes sense, things she remembered and then forgot.”

 

“Is this memory problem permanent?” Steve’s brows drew together, worry deepening the nearly non-existent lines around his mouth until Wanda and Xandria shook their head as one.

 

“It’s a side effect of putting myself back together. I had a grasp on that information and then I lost it when I fractured. It’ll eventually come back. As long as I don’t fracture again, I’ll keep hold of it.”

 

Steve nodded and sat back in his chair. Xandria risked a quick glance at Bucky, needing the reminder that he was really there as she struggled to piece together the memories she still lacked. He was looking at Steve, a worried glance that Xandria knew all too well. The pain in Bucky’s eyes tore at her and she looked away again.

 

“We’ll try and give you some information to help the process along.” Coulson managed a thin smile and motioned at the display behind him. “They didn’t just use Super-Soldier Serum. They also used a serum made from terrigen crystals. We’re just not sure what order they dosed you in.”

 

“Why?” Xandria glanced around but everyone else looked just as puzzled.

 

“We’ll have to ask them that when we find them.” Coulson’s smile grew bitter, then vanished altogether. “We do know, however, that they have a full DNA profile on you. It’s the only way they would have risked using what we’re now calling the Inhuman Serum.”

 

“What do you mean ‘risked using’ it?” Bucky sat up a little straighter in his seat. _“_ And what the hell are terrigen crystals?”

 

“Terrigen crystals are used to trigger the change from human to Inhuman, but only in those that have a specific genetic marker. In their original form, terrigen crystals are fatal to humans without the Inhuman gene.”

 

“What about the serum?”

 

“Highly unstable and extremely dangerous, according to our experts. Fatal doesn’t begin to cover what this would do to a human without the Inhuman gene. Which is why we know they had a genetic workup done on Miss Wesson. You’re still alive.”

 

“So I’m...what did you call it? Inhuman?” Xandria glanced around again as the tension flooded back into her body. “I’m not a mutant anymore?”

 

“That’s just it… we don’t know.” Coulson tapped at his tablet then motioned up at the new display dominating the wall behind him. Two strands of DNA slowly spun in place, one beside the other. “The DNA on the left is the profile we set up for you after your mission in Siberia. And this one is the profile we created after we stabilized you a few days ago.”

 

Coulson’s finger swiped over the surface of his tablet and a few segments of both DNA strands flared bright yellow.

 

“These segments, more or less, represent the X-Gene. It’s what makes you a mutant.”

 

Xandria slumped back in her seat as a wash of relief she couldn’t quite understand left her exhausted. Coulson tapped at his tablet once more and a new segment glowed blue on the display of her DNA. The segment on her original profile was smaller and paler compared to the large, vibrantly blue segment on her new profile.

 

“This is the Inhuman gene. Prior to terrigen exposure, it is essentially inactive. But once a person has been put through Terrigenesis, the gene takes on a more aggressive profile. We’re still figuring out how the genetics of it works. But my people have a bit of history on the Inhumans, if you’re curious.” Coulson waited for a moment before he add, “Not at the moment, of course. Whenever you’re ready.”

 

Xandria could only nod. The blue slash through her DNA dwarfed the X-Gene. The thing that had set her apart from humans her whole life, the thing that had given her the only family she’d ever known. It felt wrong, and she didn’t know why.

 

“What...am I?” Xandria couldn’t blink fast enough to hold back the tears this time. Panic roiled in her belly and she reached for Wanda without thinking, even as her eyes met Bucky’s across the table. There was comfort there, even through the pain.

 

“You’re you,” Bucky murmured. “You’re the same person you’ve always been. You’re an Avenger. You’re...” He trailed off and Steve jumped in.

 

“You’re our family. Changes to your DNA doesn’t change that.”

 

“But it does change _me_. My abilities, my body, my...” Xandria trailed off, eyes going wide as she looked at Coulson. “How extensive is the change? I know my energy is different, my abilities. They’re stronger, more…more... I don’t know how to explain it. They’re just ... different. But what about the rest?”

 

“That’s going to take a little more time to sort out.” Coulson’s voice took on a gentler tone. “This is crazy and hard to process, I get it. And I hate to ask. But we need to run tests, a lot of them. We need to know what Hydra did to you. How it all affected you. Running the tests might give us answers to the rest of this.”

 

“The rest of what?” Xandria glanced around again, but a new display on the wall had every eye fixed on Coulson. She turned back and could stare open-mouthed at the carnage on the screen.

 

“Is that...oh, gods.” Xandria’s hand flew to her mouth.

 

“The UN embassy in Vienna. Someone bombed it the day the team brought you in. Someone who looked just like Sergeant Barnes.” Coulson glanced up at the screen as a few video clips began to play, blessedly free of sound.

 

Bucky walked across the screen in one, nodding to a few people and stopping to talk to a few others, a duffel bag in one hand. In the other clip, flames and smoke billowed out from the room where, moments before, delegates had assembled to discuss the Accords.

 

“It wasn’t him. They know it wasn’t him, right?” Xandria threw a startled look at Bucky, then Steve. Both men shook their heads.

 

“Natasha has our flight logs, she’s going to try and clear my name. But if that doesn’t work, we’ve got to find another way.” Bucky shrugged but it did nothing to undercut the threads of panic and fear that wove through his mind.

 

Xandria’s mind reached for his on instinct but she stopped herself just shy of wrapping him in the comfort she once would have. It had been so long and with everything...in that moment, Xandria wasn’t sure it was what Bucky wanted from her. The thought made her chest ache and she turned back to Coulson before Bucky noticed saw the pain in her eyes. They had enough to worry about already. More than enough

 

“We’re sure it was Hydra,” Coulson added. “We just need to find proof. And to do that, we have to find Ward. Is it possible there’s something in your memories that could lead us to him?”

 

Every eye in the room turned toward Xandria. She froze, eyes wide and body tense.

 

“I...I don’t know. They didn’t talk in front of me, not that I remember. They just asked questions and…” She trailed off with a frown. “They...they made me see things, feel things. Things that weren’t there. But they...they felt real.”

 

Coulson went still, his hand on the table as he stared at Xandria.

 

“Do you mean hallucinations? Or something more like a different world?”

 

“They were too real for hallucinations,” Xandria shook her head. “Not unless they have a telepath on board that can do what Wanda does. This was… I’ve walked memories that didn’t feel as real as what they made me see.”

 

Coulson nodded and clenched his jaw.

 

“The Framework. They’ve got someone that can program the Framework and they fed it enough power to contain a telepath. We can use that to track them.”

 

“What’s The Framework?” Sam frowned as he glanced from Xandria to Coulson.

 

Xandria only shrugged but Coulson sighed. Another few taps on his tablet brought up a new display. The wall now bore what appeared to be a normal New York City skyline. Except the Avengers tower was gone and a Hydra base stood in its place.

 

“The Framework is a sort of digital world. When you’re inside, it feels as real as reality does. Sights, smells, sounds. Your brain registers implanted memories like real ones. It was designed for training purposes but was later hijacked when SHIELD fell.”  
  
“They put me into some kind of...of knock-off Holodeck?”

 

“Put bluntly, yes. Except in this Holodeck, there is no contacting the outside world unless you know where the exit is. Or unless someone shuts it down.”

 

“It sounds like another angle to get the information they wanted. One we should probably be worried about. Is there any way to make sure you know when you’re in the Framework?” Sam focused his attention on Coulson but the man only shrugged.

 

“It depends on what you’re seeing. As a training method, we didn’t bother hiding reality from the trainees. But with Hydra, there’s no telling how deep they sink someone into the lie.”

 

“Deep.” Xandria slowly crossed her arms across her chest, her gaze focused on the tabletop. She curled into herself without thinking. “They...I saw...”

 

“You don’t have to tell us, darlin.” Bucky leaned forward before he caught himself. Xandria felt his need to comfort her. And it made her next words that much harder.

 

“Yes, I do.” Xandria steadied herself with another breath. “They made me forget that...that Bucky left. For a while, it was the same thing over and over. I’d wake up and he...he was there. But it was always off, always...always wrong.”

 

“The smile.” Bucky flushed when Xandria glanced up at him. “That’s why you asked me to smile.”

 

“When did I do that?” She frowned and glanced at Wanda. But Wanda only shrugged.

 

“When we found you.” Bucky’s voice grew quieter when he realized the rest of the team was looking at him. “You said I was… you called me a lie. You wouldn’t believe it was me – believe we’d come for you – until I smiled for you. Now I know why.”

 

“I had no idea,” Wanda murmured. Xandria flushed.

 

“I don’t remember that.” She looked up at Bucky once more before dropping her gaze back to the table. “The...the program, I guess… it was never right. Bucky’s smile was always wrong. So they tried another program. One where I’d been rescued.”

 

Sam swore under his breath. Xandria glanced up at him but he wasn’t looking at her. Instead, he shared an angry glance with Steve, one that mirrored the sudden spike in agitation throughout the room. Xandria fell silent and tightened her arms across her chest.

 

“Thank you, Miss Wesson. I know it isn’t easy to share what they did. But this helps us. There aren’t many people who can program the Framework and even fewer that can get that much detail into it. Or make it strong enough to contain someone with your abilities.” Coulson glanced around the room, then picked up his tablet. The display behind him went dark. “I’m going to get this information to my people. Captain, I suggest reaching out to Romanov and seeing if she’s made any progress.”

 

Coulson moved around the table and stopped beside Xandria’s chair.

 

“After all of that, I hate to ask. But these tests are important. Oh-nine-hundred. Is that enough time for you to rest?” He tried to give her a gentle smile but it was clear his mind was already racing ahead to wherever it was Ward had hidden himself. “I hate to push you too fast, but we need to run those tests and determine what the serums did to you.”

 

“I’ll be ready.” Xandria made sure her voice was strong and her nod firm. Coulson was right, they needed to run the tests. No matter how tired she was.

 

“Get some rest. I’ll send someone to get you in the morning.” He patted her shoulder, then strode out of the room.

 

The team remained behind, one member looking to another for answers nobody seemed to have.

 

“So...what now?” Xandria looked up at Steve. But not even he seemed to know.

 

“Now you rest.” Sam rose from his chair. “You’re exhausted and they’re going to put you through your paces tomorrow.”

 

Wanda nodded and rose from her own chair, Piet close behind. Together they pulled Xandria to her feet as she gave Sam a tight, grateful smile.

 

“Thank you, Sam. It’s...it’s good to have you back.”

 

“It’s good to be back, kid. It’s good to be back.” He managed a smile for her before the twins hustled her out of the room.

 

When they had gone, Sam glanced over at Bucky. The other man stared out the door in the direction the Maximoffs had taken Xandria.

 

“Just give her some time, okay?” Sam was unusually gentle when he spoke to Bucky. Still, Bucky didn’t look at him. “She’ll come around. She just needs to process.”

 

Bucky didn’t answer. And when it was clear he wouldn’t, Sam shook his head at Steve and walked out, following the twins and Xandria toward the rooms Coulson had set aside for the team. Steve was left to pull Bucky from his seat and guide him after the others, neither of them sure what to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


	32. First Siren

_Come back home_. The voice hissed through her head like a demon. _They don’t understand you. But we do._

 

Xandria curled in tighter on herself as she whimpered in her sleep. She drew her shields more closely around her mind, the way she had done all her life. It only seemed to make the voice louder.

 

_All alone in that big bed. So much pain and confusion. If you’d just come home – just bring him home – we’d make everything better._

 

Whatever dream Xandria had been having flickered out of existence. The voice drove it away. And, with each word, it built a new dream of its own. Snow mounded up around Xandria and the chill of it burrowed into her bones. Without thinking, without knowing how, Xandria called on the energy that still felt alien under her skin. Warmth spiraled out from the wash of purple that rose gently under her summons.

 

_See how much easier it is when you’re home?_

 

Xandria frowned and pushed against the vision of snow, but it did not budge. Instead, the snow seemed to fall even faster. In only moments it blotted out all light. The snow burned against her skin, tiny pricks of pain heralding the fall of each snowflake. And then it was all gone. Xandria stood in darkness still but the snow had vanished. Instead, she felt cold stone under her feet, dry except for the drop of melting snow falling from her sleep clothes.

 

_Come home, Alexandria. You’re not their Miracle anymore._

 

Light rose around her and Xandria’s hands rose with it. Purple static danced between her fingers, answering a summons she didn’t even know she had given. The rest of her senses flowed out in search of the voice’s source even as she scouted for threats.

 

 _There are no threats here._ Although the voice did not change, Xandria could have sworn she heard it laugh. _We are not the enemy. We see you as you are and we accept you. We are here for you. We won’t_ _ **abandon you**_ _._

 

“Stop it!” Xandria hurled a wave of energy out from her hands. It roared across the room and crumpled a desk on the far side. But that was all.

 

_We only want to help you, Alexandria. Don’t you see that? We saw the conflict in your DNA and saved you. We saw your pain and offered a solution._

 

“Stop!” Xandria squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her hands to her head. Even in her dream, her head began to throb as she fought back against the voice, against the visions it created in her mind.

 

_Where are the others, Alexandria? Your mutant brethren? The Inhumans that should call you one of their own? Where is the rest of your team? Your supposed_ _**family** _ _? Gone. They’ve abandoned you, shunned you._

 

“No! No no no!” Xandria curled in on herself as she dropped to her knees. She couldn’t be sure if it was from the throbbing in her head or the words. All of it sent pain screaming through her mind.

 

_But we’re here. I’m here. I want you to come home. Come home, Alexandria. Bring your soldier with you and we’ll make sure you’re never alone again. Just come -_

 

“ _ **NO!**_ ”

 

* * *

 

Wanda gasped awake as pain whipped across her senses. Xandria’s mind screamed as Wanda threw back the covers on her bed and bolted for the door. She expected Pietro to meet her in the small sitting room that connected their bedrooms, woken by the same cries that had woken her. He was nowhere to be seen.

 

For a moment Wanda hesitated. Then fresh fear roared across her bond with Xandria and she knew she couldn’t wait. She threw open the door to the hall and stepped out, only to jump back inside as Bucky thundered past her. He had the door to Xandria’s room open before Wanda could make it back into the hall. By the time she made her way to Xandria’s room, only one door down from her own, Bucky was on Xandria’s bed as he cradled her trembling form in his arms.

 

“It’s okay, babydoll. I’m here. It’s okay.” Bucky murmured, his lips pressed to the top of Xandria’s head between assurances.

 

“The – the voice,” Xandria sobbed. She clutched at the arm Bucky had looped across her chest, her knuckles white and her face hidden in the crook of his arm.

 

“What voice?” Bucky tried to tip Xandria’s head back so she could look him in the eye. But every time he shifted, even a little, her grip seemed to grow tighter. “Darlin’, what voice?”

 

“W-Ward’s voice,” was all Xandria could manage before fresh sobs made it impossible for her to speak.

 

Bucky looked up as Wanda moved closer. The helplessness in his eyes stopped Wanda cold.

 

 _I can help her_. She shielded Xandria from the thought so Bucky alone would hear her. _But you might have to let her go_.

 

Bucky’s expression darkened until another burst of tears set Xandria to gasping. She struggled to breathe, a flush coloring her cheeks as she tried to get more words out between sobs. It was enough for Bucky. He nodded for Wanda to move closer.

 

_Dragă,_ _let me help_ .  _Let me in and I can help you calm down_ .

 

Xandria’s head snapped up at the sound of Wanda’s voice. She launched herself from Bucky’s arms only to catch Wanda as the other woman moved onto the bed. Bucky slid to his feet, hands hovering awkwardly before he backed away toward the door. 

 

 _The voice…_ _it wouldn’t stop._ Xandria’s voice rang out through the room, reaching not only Bucky and Wanda but the other team members who were now assembling outside the door to Xandria’s room.   


 

Wanda’s eyes flicked to Bucky, fear in both their gazes before Wanda slipped her control around Xandria’s mind. 

 

_No!_ Xandria tried to pull away from Wanda, a frustrated whine slipping from her mouth.  _I know what I’m doing. I can’t… words hurt. I can’t stop crying. But this...this I can do._

 

_They’re not ready for it,_ _dragă._ _This is something new for you, for all of us_ .

 

Xandria’s frustration was like a whip against Wanda’s mind before remorse took its place.

 

_I understand._ _Shh, shh_ _, I understand._ Wanda pressed her lips to Xandria’s temple and closed her eyes. 

 

It had never been hard to share emotions with Xandria. But whatever voice she had been hearing, whatever it had told her, had filled her with fear and anger. The emotions swamped Xandria’s mind until it fought back against everything Wanda sent her. Xandria tried to calm herself. But every step forward she took seemed only to make room for more anger, more fear. It wasn’t until she let herself fall back on Wanda’s wards that Xandria could hold onto the calm she made for herself.

 

They worked together, attacking the invading emotions from either end of their bond until their minds collided in a wash of relief. The women slumped against one another, Xandria’s sobbing reduced to faint sniffles and shuddering breaths.

 

Steve and Bucky glanced at one another before both glanced at Sam. He shrugged, then shook his head.   
“This might be PTSD. This might be Hydra messing around in her head. I just… I don’t know.”

 

The three of them looked down the hall as two SHIELD agents appeared.   


“I’ll go explain,” Steve murmured. Sam glanced back at Xandria, then followed Steve down the hall. Only Pietro remained, worry in his eyes when he and Bucky shared a look.

 

“My family.” Xandria’s words were faint enough that, at first, nobody was sure if it was her actual voice or her thoughts in their minds. “Has anyone...are they okay?”

 

Wanda met Bucky’s eyes over the top of Xandria’s head. Bucky shook his head and Wanda grimaced.

 

“We’re still trying to reach them. When the bombing happened it… it accelerated the Accords. A lot of people are relocating and things are...messy.”

 

“They’re gone.” Xandria’s voice slipped into a hollow monotone. “Just like my parents. And I’ve lost...everything. Everything from them.”

 

Pietro vanished, then returned a moment later with Xandria’s quilt over one arm. Bucky’s eyes widened as Pietro  hand him the blanket .

 

“Wanda packed it when we went looking for you,” Pietro murmured. He nodded toward Xandria. “Go. Give it to her.”

 

Bucky hesitated and glanced from one twin to the other. They both nodded. Bucky shook out the blanket and stopped as the scent of home – of the room he’d shared with Xandria, of the way they’d been – filled the air around him. He breathed deep  and tried  to hold onto the scent.  Then he  forced his feet to move again. 

 

“Xandria, darlin’? There’s still something.” 

 

Xandria looked up as Bucky draped the quilt around her shoulders. It dwarfed her, the bold prints stark against her skin. Her fingers trembled as she gathered one edge and dragged it more tightly around her. 

 

“How did...”

 

“The twins had it. Brought it with them when they came looking for you and found us first.” Bucky tried a small smile but it faded before it could really take hold. There was too much there, too much to explain. Not when Xandria still shook from her nightmare and whatever Ward had been whispering to her. 

 

Xandria held Bucky’s gaze. She knew what he was thinking, Bucky was all too aware. She’d always known. And he was ready for her anger, for the accusations. But none came. 

 

“Thank you.” It was Xandria’s turn to try for a small smile. She actually managed one and it nearly stopped Bucky’s heart in his chest to see her smiling up at him, her eyes still the shade of green they only turned when she cried. “Thank you for giving it back to me.”

 

Again Bucky couldn’t speak. Just like when she’d awoken, he couldn’t choose which words to let slip from his mouth. He wanted to tell her he’d give it all back to her, as soon as she’d let him. That he’d give her anything. But she turned away before he could find the right words, turned back to Wanda as she wrapped herself even more tightly in the quilt from the only mother she remembered. 

 

Bucky backed out of the room as Wanda settled Xandria down onto the bed and drew the comforter over them both. Pietro closed the door and urged Bucky back toward his room with a hand on the back of his shoulder.

 

“She’ll be okay,” he murmured.

 

“I know,” Bucky mumbled. He glanced back at Xandria’s room once more. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at https://bigbandbombshell.tumblr.com/  
> Find me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/BigBandBombshll  
> Find me on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/BigBandBombshell/  
> Find me on 8Tracks at https://8tracks.com/bigbandbombshell  
> Find me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/bigbandbombshell/


End file.
